because i do not believe in a personal god, i usually say something like, "i'm sorry for your loss, my thoughts will be with you and your family in the upcoming days." is this appropriate?
2007-01-16 15:27:58 · 19 answers · asked by General T 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Yes, that is very appropriate. I think that's best in general. I would never say anything about 'oh she's up in heaven now' etc. because to a large degree they are dealing with their own pain that has evreything to do with the deceased's absence.
Don't ever say anything like 'oh he had a good long life' or 'I know what you're going through' -- these can be insulting to some people and upset them.
If it is somebody who I am close to, I try to call them 4-6 weeks later because for the first few weeks there will be a lot of people calling with sympathy and to provide support. But after a while, those calls stop coming and that can be when it gets very lonely.
2007-01-16 15:36:53 · answer #1 · answered by mullah robertson 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it's someone I know well, something like this:
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. What are your plans? Do you need some help at the viewing or do you need me to pick anyone up at the airport? What food would you like me to bring for the reception after the funeral?"
If it's someone I know less well:
"I'm sorry that this has happened. Can I be of any help over the next few days? Is there anyone you'd like me to notify?"
Your condolences are fine. For me, I prefer to offer to do something rather than just wish condolences.
^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^ ^v^
2007-01-16 23:38:04 · answer #2 · answered by NHBaritone 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's very appropriate. I wouldn't mention God or heaven either. I would feel like a hypocrite if I did. That's just me.
2007-01-16 23:34:34 · answer #3 · answered by Stormilutionist Chasealogist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tell them that I am sorry for their loss and that they can come to me if they need someone to talk to and I'll try to help them in any way I can. Your words would be pretty good too.
2007-01-16 23:44:19 · answer #4 · answered by Subconsciousless 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is tell them that you are there to support them through their grief. We are mere humans and we do not possess the knowledge to make guesses on what happens after we die, so don't try to.
2007-01-16 23:39:06 · answer #5 · answered by God Fears Me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, but anything short of dancing, throwing down your hat and Shouting "Yes, Yes, Yes, THANK You Jesus" seems to be OK in most cases
2007-01-16 23:34:13 · answer #6 · answered by U-98 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, that sounds good. If you say something you don't believe, you'll only come off as insincere.
2007-01-16 23:30:58 · answer #7 · answered by Linda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's absolutely appropriate, don't change a thing.
2007-01-16 23:31:32 · answer #8 · answered by iamnoone 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
absolutely appropriate. thats roughly what i'd say to everyone in that circumstance, and hopefully, that's what anyone would say to me, instead of any obnoxious, preachy cult nonsense.
2007-01-16 23:31:06 · answer #9 · answered by Jeebus is my Rectum 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds fine to me.
2007-01-16 23:31:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋