i couldnt figure out why ive been so sad. i couldnt figure out what was it that was keeping us from getting along. well now i know. he isnt there for me emotionally. i love him very much. ive dated him for 2 yrs. i dont know what to do. plz help. ive tried talking to him and he doesnt for some reason see the problem. i hate to break up with him. what do i do. hes 43 and im 37. i feel alone at times. he showed me several times in different situations that he doesnt care what i think or how it effects me. so how does a person deal with something like that?
2007-01-16 14:49:21 · 14 answers · asked by eaglestraces123 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Your dating yourself in this relationship, not him. What do I mean by that? You have your feelings in check and know what you want and what you are not getting. Its time to move on friend. There is nothing wrong with you! In fact, your question was filled with intelligence. You can't change his thinking. You might want to in hopes. Noone changes unless they really want to. Its time you ask yourself," AM I WORTH MORE"? YOU MOST CERTAINLY ARE AND YOU DESERVE IT!!!! When you realize that and move on and look back at the situation you were in, you will smirk and think "WHAT WAS I THINKING?". He is serving you not one purpose when he is making you feel unworthy or not needed. That is his problem. NOT YOURS. Your job is to make sure you are happy. The only one who can do that is YOU!!!
2007-01-16 15:02:23 · answer #1 · answered by hbuckmeister 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are people who are attracted to emotionally distant people. They say if your father was that way, you will be attracted to men like that. I know that is kind of cliche, but there is probably some truth to it. Obviously, you can't change him. He is how he is, and at 43, you can't teach an old dog new tricks. All you can do is change yourself.
It is a good step though that you have realized this. Maybe you can ask yourself why you have found yourself attracted to him despite the frustration you feel about not having your emotional needs met? Does the r/ship remind you at all of the r/ship you had with your father? I would just say, do some soul searching. You have been with him for 2 years for a reason, in spite of it not being a fulfilling r/ship. That in itself is worth looking into.
2007-01-16 22:55:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You deserve better than that. Why would you hate to break up with someone who doesn't respect your feelings? All you're doing is making sure that the person who really will love you and respect your feelings does not meet you.
Read the book by Greg Behrendt, "He's just not that into you". All my girlfriends are passing it around, no matter what our situation is. It confirms how you really deserve to be treated. Believe me, it will be worth the read.
2007-01-16 22:54:31 · answer #3 · answered by sherockstn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine went through something similar. The guy first wife cheated on him. He did everything with my friend. Took her to met his family, went camping together, went to beach together etc...... But would only introduce her as his friend. But was trying to get her in the bed the whole time which she held out on thankfully. Long story short she had a guy come along that loved her, wanted her and now they are married with a child. Don't waste anymore time with this person. Whatever his problem is if he hasn't gotten over it in two years you are just wasting your time.
2007-01-16 22:57:03 · answer #4 · answered by britches 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow. Sounds like my man. I always ask my boyfriend why he is so emotionally dead. He is basically like a brick wall. Its like he has no feeling or no heart. It really sucks because I have been with him for 2 years and I feel so alone in this relationship.. He is rude and will say anything too hurt me. We just broke up tonight and he told me he cheated on me many times with one girl. I say get out of the relationship. Especially if you are loving like me. It really hurts after awhile..
2007-01-16 22:57:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move on... Your wasting your time with this guy... unless you like him because he's a rescue mission... Ask yourself do you love him for who he is or do you love him because you think you can change him... Be honest to yourself first. If its the latter, then you should move on... He will never change especially now that he's 43.
2007-01-16 23:14:26 · answer #6 · answered by raiden 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u r wastng ur time if some one is a total jurk u can do beter and u need to work up courage to tell him what u think it seems to me he dosent really love u
2007-01-16 22:56:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you want to be depressed all ur life????? Move on if he shows u no care. Then he has no feelings for u.
2007-01-16 22:53:10 · answer #8 · answered by kelly p 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You find someone who cares. And date him.
2007-01-16 22:52:48 · answer #9 · answered by Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We are all emotionally dead. Some of us are better at covering it up than others.
2007-01-16 22:53:09 · answer #10 · answered by ARMY Babe 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋