you like my poem?

Question

I sit here wondering were I went wrong,
listening to Beyonce' sing that song.
Hoping and praying GOD keeps me strong,
My heart keeps breaking and the days are long.
I can't get the love back we once shared,
I am lonely and I feel like nobody carees.
I just want him but he dont want me.
numbers and girls calling what could it be?
My fears reality and my life has changed.
I have no choice but to go forward and never look back again.......

Answer 1

this peom is very straightforward. that's good, but its also good to have some abstract ideas/feelings put in. there isn't alot of symbolism, and that's both bad and good.
overall, the peom is easy to understand, but doesn't allow the readers to infer ideas

if i was an english teacher, this is a 55 (way too straightforward)
if i was a normal student, this is a 85 (easy to understand)

by final judgement- a 75
this really isn't that bad though, true experience??
if this is true, then im sorry

Answer 2

Poetry firstly should be for yourself so if you like it then it's great. Just remember the sentences don't always have to rhyme and don't hold back. Look up If By Rudyard Kipling (the guy who wrote The Jungle Book), it's my favorite poem

Answer 3

Mostly good, especially if you want to write pop songs, but the last two lines sound too forced. I'd redo them.

Answer 4

I really like it! It's very good. My only criticism is in the 7th line where it says "but he don't want me" you should replace "don't" with "doesn't"

Answer 5

sounds like a song

Answer 6

aw it`s good :D
it sounds kinda sad though.

but i like it anyways !

- francineeeee.`

Answer 7

I kind of like it, good job.

Answer 8

i thought it was good its a nice poem

Answer 9

terrible. give up.