I have abusive parents can someone help me?

Question

I'm a teenager still living at home. Im a good kid and get good grades but I got caught smoking and my parents have been treating me terribly. My father has always been phyisically abusive towards me my whole life but this time its really bad. morning after I got in trouble I woke up to be hit by both my mom and dad, scratched, pushed down, punched and kicked. I have bad bruises all over my arms and a huge wound on my knee. Also my neck is torn up and bruised from where my dad grabbed my neck. I know I made a mistake but Im just a kid and isn't this punishment too harsh? To be beaten to the point where blood is coming out of my mouth. My parents have always been violent I guess its they're way of dealing with things. I just want to know what to do...I have always wanted to call the police each time but I don't want to be taken away and put in a orphanage or anything. And this time my parents say if I call the cops they'll tell them that I smoked and I'm a drug addict. Please help me

I have no where to go. I have no family here they are all in Europe and we have never kept in touch. Im afraid to talk to anyone about it I don't want to go to foster care.

Answer 1

I agree this is no way to treat a child. But, it may be that yours parents haven't learnt the better way. I am not sure if your parents are always treating you like that. If so, they you should see the police. But, be honest. If your parents are any good, then talk to them (start with your mother), and promise them to be a good kid and focus on your studies, so you can be independent and successful as soon as possible.

Good luck.

Answer 2

If you're serious, you have a nightmare on your hands.
Smoking isn't a crime, Hon, it's just an unwise choice. No matter what you did, NO one has to right to physically abuse you in the manner that you described. I understand your dilemma...you don't want anything bad to happen to your parents, and you don't want to end up in foster care. But you canNOT continue to live in a situation like this. It's hard enough being a teenager without having your parents beating on you for something that virtually every teenager tries at least once.
This is how I handles a situation in my neighborhood. I witnessed the man next door hitting his stepson with a closed fist. I was at a loss as to what do do, then finally called our township police officer. I explained the situation but said I was afraid that the man would go to jail. The officer told me that he would only send someone to school to talk to the boy, but to please call back should I see it happen again. Well, evidently this boy's parents were notified, because this man started treating the stepson much better. And no one went to jail.
Do you have an aunt or uncle that you can talk to? Or an adult that's close to your family? The parents of a friend? If not, please talk to your school counselor about this. Your parents may well be violent, but they have no right to take it out on you or anyone else. Perhaps an anger management course for them would be an option.
You shouldn't have to deal with this on your own. Please tell a responsible adult about this so that your Mom and Dad can get the help they need to become responsible parents. Best of luck to you...please let us know how this turns out. I'm worried about you.

Answer 3

What you did wasn't good, but you never deserve to be treated like that. You should tell someone...anyone. Teacher or police but tell them as soon as possible. Believe me, you do not need to live with them and anywhere else would be better. There are many foster homes that want and love children and will treat you better than you are getting treated there. You deserve to be treated better. Kids make mistakes and need to "learn" right and wrong, but abuse is wrong and you are being abused! You need love and direction not a beating. Your have to love yourself and save yourself from that situation. If things got worse, will you even live to see a future? God Bless you and good luck. By the way, if the cops see your bruises.....they are not going to believe anything your parents say.

Answer 4

You need to talk to someone, be it the cops or someone at Children Services. No child should have to live like that. If they have being doing this for some time now it is not going to get any better. Honey you really do need to tell someone and get some help and you need to do it as soon as possible. No kid wants to be put in foster care but given the situation that you are in it would be a whole better place for you to be.

I wish you all the best and I hope you do what is right for you to make you safe.
God Bless

Answer 5

Ok, Its not your fault they hit you and its not right. But you already know this. What you may not know is that their abuse towards you will effect you the rest of your life, and not just a little either. If you do not deal with it now you may not get a chance to until the effects from the abuse are perment. I cant tell you what to do but Im a former foster parent and ive seen the effects it has on childern and the plus side doesnt sound good at first,but if your seirous about your futiure you owe yourself every chance to break the chain. I know a person that was abused very badley and waited until she had been married for several years to let it be known. It has had a terriable effect on her life even though she hid it away from everyone.Know one knew but her and now she is trying to live day to day just to survive mentaly.pls dont let this happen to you. Im not trying to scare you just inform you. If you have anymore Q, I might be able to help.Good Luck

Answer 6

You need to get out of there NOW! Talk to a teacher, counselor, anyone. Even a neighbor. I know you don't want to be sent away, but could being away from the abuse be all that bad? You could die there. As far as your parents telling you they will tell on you for smoking, not to worry. You may be underage, but it's not something you can be prosecuted for. Cops have better things to bust people for than smoking, like putting away child abusers. I hope you find the guts to put these idiots away. Don't feel guity for doing it either. They have no guilt for what they are doing to you. You didn't ask to be brought into this, you were just put into it.

Answer 7

I've never been in this situation, thank God. I hope you realize that your parents are the ones in the wrong, not you. I understand that you did something stupid and now you know not to but that's no excuse to get the sh*t beat out of you. You need to go to the authorities about your parents. Better yet go to a teacher you can trust and tell them. Tell them you don't have any family here and you don't want to go to foster care, see what the adult tells you. You can't live like that! Never keep that a secret and tell a teacher or a friends parent. Please tell an adult and talk to someone. Good luck and KEEP FAITH:)

Answer 8

First of all let me tell you how sorry I am that this is happening to you. I know that fear is going to be in your way, but you have got to turn them in. Do not do it home, waite till you get to school and go to the school nurse or a counselor and let them do the calling for you.

Yes you may be put in foster care, but then your family may also be willing to take you in and the foster care want last for long. You do not need to let this keep happening to you.

I will tell you what I was told, there is nothing this bad not smoking, not drugs or sex that should make your parents react this way, punishment is one thing but this is wrong and they need to be punished themselves.

It is natural that you would be afraid, but don't let your fear get you.

I hope you listen to everyone here. I hope you do the right thing for your sake, you can't keep living like this.

Answer 9

well the fact is, as a teenager, the only option may be foster care if you can prove your parents to be abusive. If you are not ready to go to the police immediately, take pics of yourself and date and time if you need it later on.

I was caught smoking by mom and as laughable as it may seem my punishment was to be drastic- smoke a pack infront my daddy... that was 7 yrs ago, I moved out of home that very night to avoid it. I gave up myfamily for the last 7 yrs and it was not all good.

I understand you made a mistake and I am sorry to hear the abuse you have suffered. You do know if your parents are abusive as you say, if you report them and fail they will abuse you more. What you can do is take records of your beatings, menta, verbal and physical abuse, and for what . Soon you will have enough to blackmail them into leaving you alone- or you will report them.

I'm sorry i can't help you more. feel free to contact me at [e-mail]

Answer 10

Please tell someone. I know you love your parents but sometimes we have to resort to "tough love" with our family and friends.

The only way your parents will get the help they need - such as anger management and parenting skills is if they are told they will lose you.

Do you have a friend whose family you really feel close to? Go to them.

I had a very good friend who was abused in HS and she came to my mom and dad. They intern approached her parents and she stayed with us until she was able to stay in a good foster home within the same school system while also trying to emancipate herself. Not ideal- but you have to deal with the cards you are dealt.

You have to make a decision that no kid no matter how old should have to make. But listen to all of the people who have said TELL SOMEONE. This is YOUR life.

If you need more support before making this decision- Call this child abuse attorney - 1-888-257-0899 or this helpline 1-800-799-SAFE
They may be able to better assist you in some of your options.

you are in my prayers.

Answer 11

They can tell the cops what they want, but you have the bruises to match your words. Yes, you'll be put in foster care, unless another relative is willing to take you in. Talk to a grown up that you respect, like your pastor. Maybe he can council you, or maybe another relative. Is there somewhere else you can go live? You really need to get out of a physically abusive home.