What do I do? My fiance and I are to get married next January 2008 and the guy i messed around with is so sweet and he is the total opposite of my fiance, Im with my fiance for alot of diffrent reasons and with this guy, he's a really nice guy, sweet smile, and he is not in it for sex.. he makes me feel right sentimentally...this guy just found out about my fiance and wants me to decide? What do I do????
2007-01-16 08:24:22 · 29 answers · asked by marti 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I actually was kinda in this same situation, except i was the guy she was messing around with. I'm a nice guy, and still feel horrible, and wasn't in it for the sex or anything... but it worked out in the end.
Actually, now that i think about it... I made it look like it wasn't for the sex, but it kinda was. I almost made her break off her engagement so i can have my pleasure, and i fed her very minimal lies (still wrong, i know...) and the poor girl was sooo confused.
But... after all that... it worked out between them, and she ended up realizing how much she loved him, i realized how much of an a$$ I am because i knew i didn't want anything more... But ya, i didn't do much with her, and if it was any other guy then she would've gotten into a much worse situation.
Anyways, best thing for you to know. The guy your going to marry... you already know that this guy is willing to give everything up and love you and all that mushy stuff... the other guy, he can tell you things but it might not be real. Relationships are always at their best at the beginning, remember that...
Don't do something that you will regret. Whether you will regret marrying your fiance, or whether you will regret messing around with the other guy. Take some time, weigh your options, do whatever tests you need to do on the guys... make a decision. Don't mess with other people's hearts also, it's really messed up.
Wish you the best.
2007-01-16 08:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I too think you're not ready for marriage.
But before you do anything, just sit down and think about this:
Don't u love the other guy more just because he's that forbidden "thing", that could never happen? How do u know after u get together with that guy, you won't be cheating on him, with your current fiance?
Either way, I think u should cancel the wedding. If u'll mary someone u don't really want, then you'll have some REALLY hard times in the future, guaranteed.
2007-01-16 19:36:20 · answer #2 · answered by andrei . c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
obviously your falling out of love with your fiance or either its just not meant to be. Ask yourself Do you REALLY want to marry this man? If you get married remember your gonna be with him for the rest of your life. Marriage is serious. A lot of ppl just get married "just because" and end up getting divorced but if your not into him anymore then dont get married. Or maybe it's not love that you think your starting to feel for this "other man" that you've been creeping around with(hehe lol), make sure it's not infatuation or just sex because you might miss out on a good man(your fiance)!
2007-01-16 08:36:14 · answer #3 · answered by Beautiful 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to be with the other guy do it, but either way you have broken the other guys heart. I suggest that you don't marry the fiance if you having feelings about the other guy because the whole point of marrying someone is because they are the only person you want to spend the rest of your life with AND you love them whole heartedly. Not one or the other. Whatever you decide make sure you decide if for the right reasons.
2007-01-16 08:30:37 · answer #4 · answered by Angel H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This entire situation is a bad idea from start to finish. Who cares what she wants and what would devastate her! You barely said anything about your emotional health and the turmoil you went through surrounding the break up. The reason why she is coming back is because she knows she can get you at any time, you are easy terrain to plunder. She sees you as weak and a push over, you are only a backup plan in case the other situation doesn't work out. I know this is hard to read, but it is the truth. You may not know about the other guys, but trust me they are around and you are just her insurance policy. Like in the game of monopoly, you have the get out of jail free card - RUN!
2016-05-25 02:48:20 · answer #5 · answered by LucyMarie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you cheated on your fiance then there is obviously a problem in your relationship. It is better to figure that out now than later. Whether you choose this new guy or not , you need to end your engagement Hun. And if the new guy is special to you then pursue it at that time..
2007-01-16 08:30:21 · answer #6 · answered by earthangel_candy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to revaluate this whole situation. Ask yourself what you really see in both of these guys. Maybe it's not what you thought before. It seems like you are not ready to get married. I'd call off the engagement. Also, maybe you should talk to your fiance. Does he know whats going on?
2007-01-18 07:28:44 · answer #7 · answered by thathockeychick23 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
follow your heart ....make a list of the good and bad qualitties for each of the men and when your done see which qualities you want and need and choose the one that you love and just go with your heart because if you marry this man and a few years down the road you realize you married him for all the wrong reasons you will be the only one to blame and it will cause heartache for you and him dont string him aong or the other guy make your choioce
2007-01-16 08:30:15 · answer #8 · answered by ♥bLoNdIe♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a decision. I think if you are willing to cheat on your fiance, then that means that you are not 100% committed. You seem pretty into this other guy. I would say go for it.
2007-01-16 08:27:11 · answer #9 · answered by Tedo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart girl!
Otherwise, you'll just end up getting divorced in 2 years...plus, if you're already messing around, you aren't ready for marriage...plus, it's not right to keep your fiance on a string. Let him down easy and let him go so that he can find a lady that really cares for him....
2007-01-16 08:29:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋