My brother-in-law is a single Dad. He has one 5-year old daughter. He's had it pretty bad lately, major back surgery from lifting too much and he was in a car accident. But he can still get around. His car insurance is lapsed. No phone. Probably going to turn off the electric and water. He has no means to support himself whatsoever. He's about to be evicted from his rented home for non-payment. However he does manage to find the money for up his cigarette (and possibly pot) habit. All he does each day is sit around and watch TV. I think he could work, but he's hoping he'll get on disability. He has no plan for his life, and how he will get out of this mess.
What if anything should I do to help?
2007-01-16 06:43:39 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Look in the newspaper for jobs he could do. Get him in touch with state aid to help feed himself and his daughter. If he got hurt in an accident, is it possible he can sue for damages? The best thing you can do is to try not to judge him too harshly. You don't want any harm to come to the child either, and the best way to prevent that is to be a close friend and monitor the situation as objectively as possible. Encourage him. Bring him information. Help him find his options.
Good luck!
2007-01-16 06:49:34 · answer #1 · answered by Destiny 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I am not sure if I blame the guy for smoking, even if I am against it! I would find something to help him get out of this slump. Maybe even therapy, so he had someone personal to talk with each week! Or even a group therapy class of some kind! You need to let him know in a nice way that he needs to get himself together for his 5 year old! He's supposed to be setting an example, not just giving up!!! Really pound that into his brain, that might get him going!!!! It's a true statement anyway!!!!
2007-01-16 06:52:06 · answer #2 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! I think he may be depressed (I am just from reading it). This is an awful big load to carry around on a bad back. He's shutting down because he's hurt, overwhelmed and is trying to numb himself. Please enourage him to talk to his doctor about depression or call his doctor yourself and tell him of your concerns. Maybe he should talk to an attorney about the car accident. Can you let him and his daughter move in with you or someone else in the family? Please make sure his daughter isn't put into foster care (possible should they become homeless). I would suggest a family meeting to try to help him. Wouldn't you hope someone would step up and help you if you were such a predicament? Good Luck!
2007-01-16 06:58:55 · answer #3 · answered by Kimmi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should let him live his life. He is a grown man, and sounds like a flipping idiot. Just let him do his thing. It takes forever for Disability to go through, trust me I know, i am a Disability Specialist in a hospital right now and I handle many cases. It takes a very long time. It sounds like he does have a good case though. You said "major" back surgery then you think he can work now?? It could not have been too major if you think he should get right back to work now.
2007-01-16 06:50:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well he is grown maybe he has to go through things to see that there is more to life than cigarettes and pot. What about the child he lose her next especially if his utilities get shut off. I would be more worried about the child and not him.
2007-01-16 06:48:03 · answer #5 · answered by ♥♥♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, get the kid out of this mess ASAP. If she lives with him, she should not be exposed to drugs and gotta have roof over her head. Maybe the authorities should be notified, b/c it's not just about him at this point- there is another human being involved that cannot do anything about this situation.
2007-01-16 06:48:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like your husband has insecurities. you could desire to reassure him in some way, your brother in regulation is obviously not assisting the area. might it help in case you labored in a different putting? perchance if your husband might desire to work out which you have been utilising for different jobs he'd see which you weren't working there to flirt somewhat to furnish your self some independence and there is not something incorrect with that. i don't think of you may desire to "supply in" yet I purely think of that in case you like working with the conventional public you may desire to perchance seek for something slightly different and faraway from stirring kin, if just to maintain your husbands techniques comfy. Your brother in regulation might desire to be making extra of an attempt to make your husband comprehend what an asset you're somewhat than writing you off as a flirt. in spite of each and every thing, if your character is so sturdy for organization he might desire to be doing all he can to maintain you working there. Like I reported earlier, perchance if your husband might desire to work out it replace into purely a non everlasting degree to tide you over he'd relax slightly extra.
2016-10-07 06:15:32 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is unwilling to get out and get help or get a job there is nothing that you can do for him. People like this just want a free ride while they sit on there bum. Don't waste your time helping him you will just feel bad and down when all your help is gone to waste.
2007-01-16 06:49:15 · answer #8 · answered by Jessica H 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Call social services. The child should be taken care of. She shouldn't have to suffer cuz of her dad.
2007-01-16 07:09:11 · answer #9 · answered by fab 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him find his own solutions. You could offer to watch his daughter so he can look for more jobs.
2007-01-16 06:48:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋