My best friend is completely depressed because one her closest guy pals has been forbidden from having anything to do with her by his girlfriend. Basically everything was fine until another friend let slip to his girlfriend that years ago they had a one night stand. It was absoultely years ago and they were only ever mates - nothing in it whatsoever - just a drunken fumble when they were both single and he had never even met this new girlfriend. The girl has now forbidden her boyfriend from having anything to do with my friend and this means she has been cut out of the social circle more or less completely. We are all in our 30s and this situatin is just silly - I feel so bad for her and have advised that she talks to the girlfriend. Can anyone else offer advice on this one?
2007-01-16 06:27:57 · 10 answers · asked by Islandgirlss 2 in Health ➔ Diet & Fitness
Key sentance here. we are all in our thirties...however, the girlfriend is just protecting what it hers so to say...and if she doesn't trust the guy, then I can understand her fear...it does get in the way of a relationship, when another girl who has been intimate with a guy comes along, and can be tempting for the boy if a fight say should happen, and there goes the cheating...I say, tell your friend, to stay out of it, and don't get the blame if the other two break up...tell her to find a new friend, I think...this can only lead to someone really getting hurt.
2007-01-16 06:36:22 · answer #1 · answered by MotherKittyKat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's so silly and childish. the girlfriend also has some pretty serious issues with insecurity. But it is not just her that is out of control. Where is the boyfriend in all this? Why isn't he managing to keep the peace? There are obviously some trust issues between the two of them.
I really hope your friend is ok, seclusion is a terrible downer. It won't be forever though.
I think you should talk to the boyfriend and get him to sort this thing out. His partner is causing the problem, and partners act together you know? If they have a problem it should be kept between them. At the moment it is spilling over and causing sadness to your friend.
2007-01-16 06:40:12 · answer #2 · answered by jameso79 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep your thoughts are right.. at this point the "girlfriend " is running the show. Your friend needs to bring her man around more or get one. Talking to the girlfriend is the best thing for "friend" to do, and maybe the ONLY way to get in the circle again. Honesty is best at this point.... she needs to explain the situation to the GF and hope she understands. Under no circumstances EVER should a woman ever give the impression she is a whore, easy, or a sneaky sleaze. By saying it was a drunk night and we just had a 1 nightstand might make her think.....When we go out this chicks gonna be on my man when I turn my back.
2007-01-16 06:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by stephanie1101 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend's gf does not have confidence in that relatinship. He needs to say that she is a friend and that's all. Then he needs to ask her if he has given her any reason to doubt or not trust him since they have been dating. She needs to get over it. If not, then she needs to move on to someone she can actually trust. As far as your female friend, she should keep doing what she has been doing. There is no reason she should feel like an outsider now. NO One should feel that way because of this incident long ago. If the gf won't be part of the circle because of the other woman, so what? Leave her out. Eventually, she and the guy will either move along or she'll have to get over it.
2007-01-16 06:43:46 · answer #4 · answered by Baileysmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I might rethink my friendship with the one who "accidentally" slipped this information. Why would you tell someone's girlfriend that her boyfriend slept with another girl in the circle of friends?????
Lots of women don't feel comfortable with ex's and it is hard to buy that there is no longer any attraction no matter how long ago.
Your friend might try to tell the GF that she absolutely has no interest in her boyfriend, but if she's single (your friend that is) she may have problem believing that and could make matters worse.
Don't see why she is out of the circle with loss of one couple. People understanding situation can alternate activities with her or the couple. Awkward, but why abandon her???
2007-01-16 06:39:50 · answer #5 · answered by cathoratio 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is she cut out of the circle why cant you and your friends still hang out with her if i were you i would explain what you have explained to us here she should get it and be ok unless she is a real jealous type or her boyfriend and your friend flirt alot
2007-01-16 06:37:09 · answer #6 · answered by Nightchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's totally not fair. I say that you all should get together "rebel" against his girlfriend. Continue to invite your best friend around. If your friends girlfriend doesn't like that, then she can leave herself.
2007-01-16 06:56:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's absolutely ridiculous that his girlfriend would be like that. If I was him I would lose the girlfriend. Seriously. She's just being childish.
2007-01-16 06:37:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
have the others who take her side talk to the guy and tell him he needs to figure out his priorities and decide if the girl hes seeing is worth throwing away a wonderful friendship over. good luck!
2007-01-16 06:36:51 · answer #9 · answered by yourmygoodfeeling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell her "Guy friend" and if he doesn't do anything about it, then he probably isn't that great of a friend. You are being a great friend, though, so keep up the good work.
2007-01-16 06:35:39 · answer #10 · answered by ☆Star☆ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋