In the last 7 or 8 years my dad has been really rough on me. For example, I bought new shoes the other day and the first thing he said was "they are going to look stupid with your pants". Also, I catch him staring at me and when I ask why he's doing it, he says that he wasn't staring, but he obviously is. I'm a good son and we get along alot but he talks down to me alot too. It's like nothing is good enough that I do. What is your take on this?
2007-01-16 05:55:27 · 5 answers · asked by xxbenchxxmarksxx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I agree, maybe he looks at you and sees what he could have been, if he had the chance to be your age again...looking at you with maybe dissapointment, but in himself.....Some parents just don't think when they speak that the words they utter may not sound wrong to them, but they are. You can say anything, but the way you say it, the tone of voice, and not thinking before speaking can really hurt someones feelings....maybe when he does that to you it is an unconscious way of making himself feel "big", without even knowing he's doing it......You take what he dishes out and promise yourself, when you have children of your own, that you won't do that to them.......have a great day!
2007-01-16 06:09:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry your dad isn't treating you well. He should be proud that you bought shoes for yourself with your own money. Is it possible he's trying to be funny, but it's coming out wrong? It's hard to talk to your parents sometimes because they get defensive if you tell them you're unhappy about something they did or said. I would suggest you write a letter to him telling him how you feel, giving examples as you did above. Be specific about when he talks down to you how it makes you feel. Let him know you love him and want to have a good relationship with him, but he seems to be pushing you away. Maybe you two could do some activity together that is fun (go fishing, wash/work on a car, watch a game, go to the movies, bowling, play poker, etc.). Sometimes reconnecting can make a difference. Good Luck!
2007-01-16 06:06:17 · answer #2 · answered by Kimmi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When kids get a certain age we start looking at them different. Maybe he is amazed at how much you've changed since you where little. It's hard for some grown ups to imagine our kids all grown up and he doesn't know what to say to you. We often don't share the same fashion sense as you kid's. He may think he just being honest. Let him know that the way he says thing's hurts your feelings. You might be surprised to find out he doesn't even realize that his words are hurting your feelings. He can't read your mind! Don't assume he knows how you feel! Talk to him! He loves you! Good luck!
2007-01-16 06:33:07 · answer #3 · answered by Mommy dearest 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he's jealous because u are young..?
maybe he feels u are growing apart, because u are maturing and soon going to go to college and stuff (don't know ur age)...?
not sure, need a bit more info. is he married? does ur mother live w/ u? if he feels badly about himself, he may be projecting that anger and disappointment ONTO you... even tho u haven't done anything "wrong". perhaps u can try to boost up his spirits, encourage him to be more active, involved in church or other groups, to get his attention off u...?? good luck
2007-01-16 06:01:50 · answer #4 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think he love you and seeing you all grow up and all make him happy but he don;t want to tell you how handsome and good you grown
2007-01-16 06:21:26 · answer #5 · answered by maya 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋