ok, the preacher's wife is being really biased. she is literally trying to make her 2 daughters the center of attention, all of the time. i am not jealous, because there are others even adults who see it. and they agree with me. she only wants her daughters to have solos and be section leaders etc. and the daughter whine to her and get their way all of the time. even if it means hurting one of the church members. how do i address this problem that has been going on for so so long?
2007-01-16 03:57:10 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
How close are you to the wife? If you are suppose to be close friends, start by talking to her about this. Just tell her that it would be a good idea and a Christian thing to do to let others also particpate so that they also feel members of the the church. Maybe you can confront her, first, with a couple of women who are her friends so she can hear the truth spoken in love. If this does not work, go to the elders of the church. Apeal to them and ask them to speak with the preacher and his wife, afterall, it is his whole family, not just her. Find scriptures about favoritism in James that you might use. Remind them about the "Body of Christ," and that we all serve in different ways and have talents that should be used for Christ. Afterall, we all need to see how we can glorify christ. Maybe her daughters can help someone else shine. this is just way where they can be helpful and still the other person chines. Also remind them that the spotlight should be on God, not their talent. Remind the pastor, her husband that if people do not feel useful, needed and appreciated and a part of the congregation, they might find someone else to worship, somewhere that values them as "church members and part of the body." Just some thoughts.
2007-01-16 04:09:43 · answer #1 · answered by JAN W 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask her out to lunch, or at a play group or something, tell her you and some of the other members are concerned that their children are being left out and it seems like the same children are the center of attention all the time. Tell her some members have talked about going to other churches, but say it in a nice and concerned way. I guarantee she'll listen, since her husband's salary depends on the congregation.
2007-01-16 04:04:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get several of the members together and confront the preacher and his wife together. As a group it won't seem like a jealousy thing but it will show them it is a real problem in the congregation. If they don't want to lose their members they will correct the problem.
2007-01-16 04:02:53 · answer #3 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well there's the whole confrontation thing, go them first face to face alone in private, then if that doesnt work take 1 more person with you, in private and then escalate as necessary (matt 18) then there is the whole senior leaders wife and kids thing going on, could be touchy be careful but your feelings need to be heard, respect and love not finger pointing and accusations need to be remebered and in the end nothing may change and you may need to look for another church.
2007-01-16 04:05:09 · answer #4 · answered by claimusic 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like most churches.... Just be upfront with her, no matter what you say if you stand up for whats right you are going to make her mad. She is using her position to her advantage and that is wrong. I am not christian but I grew up in a Christian house hold and went to church as a kid and teen, I have seen this going on in so many places. Stand up for what you believe in and what your heart says is right, So what if she gets pissed, you are not only standing up for yourself but the other children and church members.
2007-01-16 04:52:46 · answer #5 · answered by Chris 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get the whole congregation together to talk to her and her family. GOOD LUCK!!! My ex and his family were even worse for they were the whole church! The organist, the board, etc.
2007-01-16 04:01:24 · answer #6 · answered by rhonda_seiler 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
change churches dah get over it..
2007-01-16 04:01:43 · answer #7 · answered by swimmyfishy 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋