I have a woman problem of an irregular sort.I am embarrassed to talk about it but I need help...?

Question

Here goes. First let me say that I say this with no ego or pride. I'm a smart,nice, handsome single guy.No Brad Pitt,etc.When I start dating a woman, a strange phoenomenon occurs after we sleep together.They turn crazy.They "fall in love with me",want to spend the "rest of our lives together",call me constantly;SMOTHER me with affection.Apparently I am "The most amazing" guy in bed."I am perfect". I always make sure to say beforehand I don't want a Long Term Relationship.They say they understand.Always within 24 hours comes the pitch. I have been proposed to MANY times.Sent gifts....AT WORK! I don't want this! I don't ever want to HURT a WOMAN but they just throw themselves at me. I'm always nice and I KNOW I haven't led anyone on, but it is really starting to overwhelm me. One woman told her whole office that " I was God in bed" and I see them around.I don't want to settle down, nor am I a slut, but as soon as they start with the LOVE and MARRAIGE and I NEED YOU talk, I have to split

I just had a few ad ons after pondering some feedback.First, I don't think it's a particular type.I really like and admire women in general and probably reflect that.I grew up with 3 sisters so am very comfortable.One of my first LT girlfriends was very sexual and enjoyed showing me lots of ways to physically please her. So I like making women feel good.But, although I really am candid and have no bad intent (just the opposite) I still feel like I am doing wrong.If I hurt anyones feelings at all, it is awrong in my book.So maybe a vaca from dating to do some introspection.I have been vaguely planning a S.Amrc. trek .Due to some other issues going on -death/loss- I think it's a good time to spend a few solo months reconsidering what it's all about. lastly though, in my defense, I date ALL types, am totally forthcoming,don't have a malicious bone in my body, and am truly sorry if anyone has been hurt or mislead by me. Is there a Legion of Doom drug to Viagras Hall of Justice?

Answer 1

It's NOT because you're great in bed, you delusional fool! There is a BIG difference between the way we (men) think of relationships compared to women.

Now, on to generalizations.

Men have sex. We are just sticking it in (sorry, that's crude, but that's probably what you think). Women, on the other hand, are sharing a part of themselves with you by allowing you entry into their bodies. Very different experience for both sides.

Men want no limits or controls. Women want stability. Women are willing to accept faults in a man she's been with, thinking they can "change" or "learn to love". Men, like yourself, will write off a woman as "crazy" as soon as she starts reverting to form.

Until you learn a few things about yourself and your lovers, you will continue to have this issue.

Final advice: Don't sleep with women who aren't your friend first. Even if you want a "buddy", you want a friend for that, and only a friend will truly understand that's what you want. On the other hand, you might both just fall in love, based on your friendship and intimacy.

Answer 2

ok well lets assume you are telling the truth. I want to thank you for leaving these women so that I am not answering another of those "my husband/BF is an unfeeling asshole" questions.

Second I would like to say I believe your whole story...NOT! You may have blown a girl or twos hair back but one woman in bed is so different in needs and expectations as to be almost a different species.

This is the thing most guys need to learn. Each woman is differnet in bed you need to find out what makes her tick and how it makes her tick. It is rarely and I mean really rarely all physical.

Everyone enjoys a good pounding once in a while, but that doesn't make a guy a god if he is able to provide that.

Answer 3

Ok, you could stop sleeping with different women until you are ready to commit to one.. that way when she goes gaga over you, it will be a good thing. If that is just not for you, you should avoid sleeping with women that you will have to see daily. Like if you work in the same office, or say the chick working at your favorite coffee place. That way it shouldn't interfere with your everyday life. Oh, also don't tell them where you work so they can't send the gifts. I think its good that you are telling them exactly where you stand ahead of time, I would keep doing that. Good luck!

Answer 4

You are certainly the envy of every man reading this, I'm sure. But I don't understand why "you have to split". Why not continue to bed these ladies and share those pleasures while continuing to let them know you have no desire for a LT relationship?

Women seem to be born wanting a husband, but what they really want and need is a man to complete their identity. Having the services of a wonderful stud like yourself is probably a really good short-term substitute.

Answer 5

I think you are getting with the wrong kind of women. You need to find a women who really wants nothing other then a good time. It sounds like the women you attract are mistaking sex for love. And that's just bad business. There are women out there who just want a good time and nothing else. This may take some time to pick these women out, but you can find them if you are looking for them. Its ok to be picky, and don't think you have to sleep with every women who shows interest in you. Most of the time those women are the ones who are looking for love in all the wrong places. Just pace yourself and take your time. You can find a girl who is not lose and still only wants to have a good time. Just be patient, and be yourself, and you will find that are easier to find, and most of the time will find you. Hope this helps. thanks.

Answer 6

I am like this too, with the love & marriage talk, and I'm assuming you don't want to settle down. I can't say I blame you but you might want to consider what your doing when you get with these people. Something tells me your enjoying what happens regardless of what you say. If your going to be involved with someone, and you give them 100% satisfaction in that department, then be prepared for what follows. It's only normal when someone is satisfied, that they will want to hook up with you in a deeper way. In the future, tell people you know your not ready for love or marriage before you sleep with them, and make it very obvious in some way, that way these people will know what your about before it all gets started.

Answer 7

I am not sure that i really understand what your question is..From what you have said you are upfront with these women and you tell them that you don't want a relationship so basically all you want is someone to have sex with but all the women that you are sleeping with want to have a relationship with you.Here is my suggestion to you and I mean no disrespect but stop using women and playing with their emotions what you need is a prostitute they do not get emotionally attached all they want is the same thing you want and that is just sex.Strat sleeping with prostitutes and BLAM your problem is solved.This way you can sleep with different women of your choice with no attachments although you may aquire a life long disease.

Answer 8

stop having sex on the first date. Set ground rules for yourself and have some higher expectations for the women you date. Perhaps the way you present yourself and view yourself is the reason why these women act like insane mothers. I'm sure you feel smothered but you like it just the same. Change your expectations of yourself and the women you attract will be the type you are looking for.

Answer 9

Sorry to hear about your sh*tty situation.. that def. blows. I have a friend who is a lot like the women you are describing....she always gets involved with guys who make it quite clear they are not looking for a relationship...she claims to understand but then once she sleeps with them she becomes a PSYCHO! Stalker, callin them all the time, following them around, and warding off any new booty the guy might have a chance of hittin....I've asked her before why she CONTINUES to do this to herself and she could only answer "i dont know." so it could be that these women you are sleeping with just don't know. She did one night tell me that she always falls for guys who dont wanna relationship and part of the appeal is because she wants to see if she could be the girl to make these relationship constipated guys commit. It's part of a game of sorts!

Screw That....just have sex with the girls and dont give them your phone number or tell them where you live...no way to contact you! HAHA that might alleviate some of the problem!

Answer 10

Sorry to burst your bubbly this has practically nothing to do with you being good in bed.

You happen to go after clingy, co-dependent women who like to bore their colleagues and friends with all of their dysfunctional relationships. I feel bad for her co-workers more than anyone else in this scenario!

I bet those poor people in the cubicle next to hers have heard more than their fair share of "woe-is-me why can't he just love me and when will he realize that i am the one for him" stories before you even came along. UGH. How tiresome.

Stop boning these kinds of women and you will avoid their dramatics and her colleagues can get some work done.