Is this how you feed pills to cats... anyone with experience of it?

Question

1 Pick up your cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position left forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat’s mouth opens pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2 Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3 Retrieve cat from bedroom and throw away soggy pill.

4 Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5 Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse in from garden

6 Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between the knees; hold front and rear paws. Ignore growls and grumbles from cat. Get spouse to hold cat’s head firmly with one hand while forcing a wooden ruler gently into cat’s mouth with the other. Drop pill down the ruler and rub cat’s throat vigorously to make it swallow.

7 Retrieve cat from curtain rail; get another pill from foil wrap. Make a note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8 Wrap cat in a large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with cat’s head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of a drinking straw, force cat’s mouth open with pencil and blow down straw.

9 Check label to make sure pill is not harmful to humans, drink a beer to take away the taste. Apply Band-aid to spouse’s forearm and remove blood from the carpet with soap and water.


10 Retrieve cat from neighbour’s shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck, so as to leave the head showing. Force mouth open with dessertspoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11 Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check date of last tetanus jab. Apply whisky compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12 Ring fire brigade to retrieve the bloody cat from the tree across the road. Apologise to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13 Tie the little bugger’s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of the dining table. Find heavy pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertical and pour 2 pints of water down cat’s throat to wash down pill.

14 Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to A & E, sit quietly while doctor stitches your fingers and forearm, and remove pill from your eye. Call at furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15 Arrange for RSPCA to collect the mutant cat from hell and ring local pet shop to see whether they have any hamsters.

Answer 1

Hi there...your forgot one!

HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL:

1) Wrap it in bacon.

Source: http://www.jokefile.co.uk/numerical_order/1132.html

Answer 2

I notice alot of people are telling you to just crush the pills and put them if food. While this is a good idea, not all pills can be crushed. I work in a pharmacy and can tell you that some pills are not as potent when crushed and are supposed to be taken whole. If you're not sure, ask your vet. Another way to give your kitty his meds is to pry open the mouth and toss the pill into his mouth as far as you can, then close his mouth, and while you're holding his mouth closed, take one hand and rub his throat in DOWNWARD. This helps the cat swallow the pill. You might need someone to help you but it's the least stressful way if you can't crush the pills.

Answer 3

Hahaha! Well, sounds a lot of fun (!) although pretty unproductive! Yes, I have had experience of feeding pills to cats, and though not QUITE as bad as that ;) I know the difficulty.

Here is a method that, after several days of frustration, I discovered worked: Take the pill, knock it into pieces, slit open several chunks of cat food or pieces of fish, and slip a small piece of pill inside each chunk.

If you find your cat stubbornly eats its way around the chunks of meat containing pill pieces, which the cat I did this for did on occasion (not every time, just when she felt like being awkward) then this way is nearly foolproof: Grind the pill up with a pestle and mortar to a very fine powder and sprinkle it evenly over the bowl of cat food. I say nearly foolproof because I don't know if your cat will then refuse the food entirely, but I don't think he/she will!

ONLY do this and or the first method if the pill box does not have instructions for the pill to be swallowed whole. If it does, well, keep trying to stuff it down there! lol!

Answer 4

Place your cat in a Pillow case and allow only it's head to come out. That way they are no longer able to scratch you or run away and you can hold them with one hand.
Next you need to use a syringe like device to feed the pill to the cat. Put the pill in the device and put it into the cat's mouth. Push the end past the tongue and trigger the release. Easy!

Answer 5

This is funny. I do have experience of some of the earlier points but not the latter. You can get a special pill thing from your vets - it looks a bit like a plastic syringe which you fit the pill in at the end. Works a treat. Costs about £2.

Answer 6

Very cute!

I have to retrieve my cats from under the coffee tables to pill them - that means from under the one in the living room while they move to the one under the table in the den and back and forth, back and forth till I am successful in grabbing them. I use the plastic "pill popper" to give it to them. Usually the only problem is getting a hold of them at all. The pill goes down successfully.

By the time I get the cat I am usually pretty p****ed and they don't get "cradled".

Answer 7

Exactly!
My sweet little girl turned into the demon cat from hell when I had to give her medicine! You should see the scars on my arm. Not pretty. This is one of the few times that I say dogs are so much easier!! Wrap in a bit of cheese and the pill is gone.

Answer 8

Easy, once you get the hang of it. Take a handful of dry cat food, or, better yet, cat treats. Hide the pill in the food. If your cat will eat out of your hand, good. If not, lay the food on the floor and let him sniff it. When he gets hungry, he will start to eat, devouring the pill as well. I know, it sounds too easy to be true, but it worked with my cat! I gave Mr. Bubs (my cat) worming tablets in cat food, and he ate them up as if they were just an ordinary kibble. Hope this helps!

Answer 9

Yep! Just about right, I would say! However, you can buy a pill thingy from pet shops which takes the pill and some water and enables you to shoot them down the back of the cat's throat.

Answer 10

I have an easier way. Take the pill, pound it to a powder, take a bit of food that can be mixed. Tuna for example has a mushy consistency or ground chicken breast or some food they love and put it in there. They'll devour it right up...