I have a 4 year old cousin that is currently living with me. The child is very free spirited and full of energy, and i love that. However, he also can be a pain in the ***. Sometimes he'll start whining if i don't give him something or give into something he wants done. sometimes it's so aggravating that i wanna smack him- but that's wrong. So, i would like to know how i can teach him, in a positive way, that what he is doing is inappropriate.
2007-01-16 01:48:27 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Four is a tough age with any kid. It's also the best time to start teaching about right/wrong good/bad etc. You have to be firm but caring. If he starts whining about not getting something, explain to him that whining will not get him what he wants and show him the right way to ask for things. He will still whine and be rambunctious, he's a four year old boy. But when he does something right, praise him. Say something like "Good job asking like this" or "Thank you for..." and give specific examples of what you are praising him for. Use more verbal praise than material praise because if you constantly give him things, he will always expect that from you and the situation could end up getting worse. As far as doing things for him, try offering to help him do them if he can. There are certain things/skills he may not be able to do and he may need you to do them for him, but take this as an opportunity to show him how to do it. He may not be able to do the task on his own for some time, but from that point on he may be able to help you do it. That's also a good way to teach responsibility. Even if you are doing a simple task around the house such as straightening something up or doing dishes, ask him to help you. Make things into games. It sounds goofy but it will work. If you make it fun for him to do, then he will be more willing to do it and will whine less about it. Remember to give him praise when he does something and do not reinforce what you do not want him to do such as whine. When he whines about not getting something, explain to him so that he understands why he can not have it and ignore him if he continues to whine. It sounds mean, but if he continues to whine and you continue to acknowledge it he'll see it as the fact that whining is good. Another idea would be to create a make a chart out of poster board, and everytime he does something good (not whine, helps with a task, etc) he can put a sticker or something on the chart and after so many stickers he gets some kind of reward (you taking him somewhere special, a piece of candy, etc). The key is not to spoil him. This sounds like a lot to do and it can be difficult. But if you do it consistently, he should eventually learn. It will not happen overnight, he's only four, but in the long run it will be the best. The key is to be consistent, firm, and still caring. Good luck!
2007-01-16 02:20:04 · answer #1 · answered by bailes5625 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be direct. Give him reward points for being good and if he is bad time out. When he has earned enough points, set a limit, then you will do something special together for those points. Example 10 points to play a board game with him. You did not say how old you are so I do not know if you could do things like go to the play ground, etc. but you can always play catch in the yard too. Encourage him to do self entertaining things, such as drawing, coloring, building blocks or looking at books.
2007-01-16 01:59:42 · answer #2 · answered by JAN 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
in case you elect to tell his mom than circulate forward, perchance that's going to offer her a head's up as to her son saying this to human beings.. yet she possibly already is conscious. Your cousin in all probability purely found out what "boobie's" are, or has purely chanced on them anyhow.. he probbaly think of's their neat because of the fact he doesnt have any. My 4 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous son has executed comparable issues, he's purely discovering. sturdy success with your solutions!
2016-10-07 05:59:38 · answer #3 · answered by cosco 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would suggest a time out for you and him, this allows him to be separated from you, so no hitting goes on, you calm down and he calms down, 4 min. passes and then you get down to his level and explain why he was placed in timeout, and what you expect behavior wise, if this happens again you will be back in time out, with repetition the negative behavior will stop, also be sure to praise and reward good behavior when it happens to encourage the good.Blessings in dealing with your 4 year old, i know they can be a daily challenge, i have a four year old son.
2007-01-16 02:05:47 · answer #4 · answered by taffneygreen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When he whines DO NOT give in. He needs to learn that being patient will be better for him in the long run. When he whines tell him that you cannot understand what he is saying and that unless he speaks in a normal tone and says please and thank you that you will ignore him.
2007-01-16 01:52:57 · answer #5 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to get to his level. Tell him calmly that you dont understand him, and ask him to use his words, if it is something that he cannot have give him an alternative. He will appreciate the attention and the calm voice will help to settle him down.
2007-01-16 01:56:23 · answer #6 · answered by willy g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
4 year old can easily be distracted, so when they get in a strop or want something, just start talking about something else that would interest them. if that doesn't work offer them something else.
2007-01-16 01:54:34 · answer #7 · answered by sweety 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
read the book "how to talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk by Faber/Mazlish its an amazing book.
2007-01-16 02:03:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when he starts crying let his mom deal with him.
2007-01-16 01:54:09 · answer #9 · answered by Badboy21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋