My husband was sent to Iraq for 15 months and the miliarty took out child support every month and now that he is back home and just started working again she is calling him names because she only $36.00 this month.He won't even get a check unitl the 19th of this month.
This woman also lives with her boyfriend who pays for the house that they live in and pays her car payment and she works to, she gets $15.00 a hour.I think it's just a way for her to get in to our business. she is always trying to get info out of my husband and she also tells there child that she wishes that her dad wasn't her dad. What should I tell her
2007-01-15 17:05:20 · 14 answers · asked by shorty 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Got a couple different points to make here:
1. You knew what you were getting into when you married him. You knew he had a child, and you knew he had to pay support. You need to stay out of it.
2. If he is making less money now, than he was, he can always go back to court and see if they can agree on a lower amount.
3. She shouldn't be saying things to the child, however, some people are just like that...
On the other side,
1. It costs a LOT to raise children.
2. It is not HER boyfriend's duty to raise YOUR husband's child.
3. Children are there for a lifetime, the non-custodial parent should be there for a lifetime as well....and not just financially
4. It doesn't matter how much she makes, what kind of house she has, what kind of car she drives, she has a child that is the responsibility of BOTH parents, it's not a question of trying to get into your business...that child automatically makes her a part of your business.
5. Many times, it's tough to make a general statement that the "custodial parent is just bitter", there are many facts surrounding every case, and to make such a generalized statement is not right.
2007-01-16 04:25:37 · answer #1 · answered by nerdy girl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My fiance and I are having a horrible time with his ex wife also. She does the exact same thing but two children are Involved and we pay twice the amount your husband pays. She has used their kids continuously to get more money from him. I promise this has nothing to do with money though she believes that she Is entitled to every penny he makes. As miserable as you can possible be Is still not enough hate that she has. She does not want you or your husband at any time to be happy or do better than she Is. My fiance's ex Is now remarried and they are trying to start another family but every couple of days she has to call and yell and cuss and get my fiance all upset. I've been verbally assaulted by her for doing everything I can for their kids. They are not allowed to say my name In her house. I believe these woman have emotional problems. They cannot move on because they have so much hate and jealousy. Just try to Ignore the situation the best you can and hope that one day she will move on. At any point don't let her see that this bothers either of you because that's all she Is after.....good luck!
2007-01-15 17:47:24 · answer #2 · answered by passion 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for you to do sine your husband is back is to let him deal with his ex. If she wants to take him to court, then she can, and the judge will set a fair amount for child support. Many, if not most stepfamilies have issues with child support, one side always feels its too high, while the other feels it is too low.
Neither parent should ever bad mouth the other in front of the child, and your husband needs to have a talk with his ex regarding that. Otherwise check your caller id, and if you know that it is the ex calling to stir up trouble, let the machine get it until you are ready, or should I say your husband is ready to deal with her. How she spends her money is no more businees of yours, than it is hers on how you spend her money, so don't even worry about who is paying her bills.
Try joining an online support group for stepparents so that you can be supported by those whom are in your shoes and try letting your husband deal with the ex so that you dont have to get caught in the middle.
2007-01-15 17:15:17 · answer #3 · answered by Julie c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is kinda hard but you need to let him handle her. She is just being a pain in the butt. They base child support on the income of both of them and most states require a 50% change in income or a three year time period before they will make any changes to the amount he has to pay. This support issue is unfortunately between them-the court will tell you the same thing. you were not there when the child was conceived therefore it does not concern you. (I know it does but not in the eyes of the court). Best of luck.
2007-01-16 03:11:12 · answer #4 · answered by stacilynn26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first you have to have a child support order, and you need to be going through the child support division in your city. If you have the order or even a court order for that matter you take it to the child support place and let him go through them. This is in the best interest of you. If he get s behind, they will make him pay you. They will garnish his wages, the will put a lien on his car, next they will take his license and if he still doesn't pay in a timely manner then they will take him to jail.
2016-05-24 20:51:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he make as much as he did when he was in Iraq? If not then he can petition the court for a lower amount of support. What she makes and who is paying what doesn't help in court for support. The support is for the child. Food, clothes, heat, school, etc. Have him petition the court.
2007-01-15 17:16:48 · answer #6 · answered by lynnie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should mind your own business and realize that his past is not for you to do anything about...You knew what you were getting into, didn't you? If you feel that your husband is not dealing with it in an acceptable manner, discuss it with him, and only him. If you do not get satisfaction, leave him. It's not your child or your ex, so be mature and secure, and stay out of it.
2007-01-15 17:12:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
you really need to stay out of this when it come to the child,
i know that sound harsh,but if she say these things and doing
things that she doing then you will only put you in the middle
of this, your husband need to talk to her about what she is saying
to the child or if the child is over age then he can talk to her
but if she see him then she will see for self how her dad
feel about her,there are parents that put the kids though this
to keept things going on.
2007-01-15 17:11:47 · answer #8 · answered by luckystar 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not her boyfriends responsibilty to look after your husbands child.
$500 a month is not alot of money, children cost ALOT more than that per month.
Tell your husband to start stepping up and to take care of his kids.
2007-01-15 17:16:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell her to back off. She has no business putting ideas into the kid's head, or trying to persuade the kid's thinking.
2007-01-15 17:15:44 · answer #10 · answered by dead_end_lies 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋