falling out of love? honey, id be absolutely nuts if i was in your shoes. leave his @ss! do you really like being stuck at home all the time being told you can or cannot do something?
make a plan and get the hell out. you only live once. dont spend your life being his puppet!!
2007-01-15 11:03:20
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answer #1
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answered by pussycat 2
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PLEASE be realistic!! 'How on earth can you love someone like him'??? What you are really suffering from is 'fear, and a low
self esteem', and because you 'ARE' being abused you have
automatically submitted to his total control over you.
You are basically Co-dependent, a needy woman who has fallen into the trap of spousal abuse.
You must do everything you can to get away from this man.
If you really think he loves you, then you certainly do have a
mental problem, and I'm not trying to be rude here..
This man does 'NOT' love you at all.
He's a controller, and abuser, and if you don't get away from him
your kids are the ones who will suffer in the long run.
Do you want your kids to grow up and behave like he does, because they will if you stay with that loser!!
He not even a good father either, so GO< get away from him
before something 'does' happen..
You deserve much better than what he has to offer, and so do your kids!! poor little darlings..
The best option is to call the police the next time you feel the least bit afraid of him.
You have 'got' to get over thinking all this is your fault.
Your husband is a 'sick' person and it's HIS fault..
PLEASE GET AWAY FROM HIM !!!!
2007-01-15 15:48:56
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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I'm gonna reread this question several times to see if I comprehend it properly. BUT I'll attempt to answer....and plz don't hold it against me whatever I say because as indicated, I don't think I'm getting this right at all. He wants to do what?? Your cheating aside. PAST. GONE. So I'll pretend that didn't happen because even if you cheated that doesn't make it right for him to also carry on an affair now...3 years later It's either he's gonna be with you and make it work OR try to see if he can relive in that pasttime paradise with that old high school flame. One or the other but definitely not both. He can be as open as church doors on a Sunday, I wish my fiance would fix his mouth to be confessing all this to me. And why are you torturing yourself sitting and listening to all the details of their relationship? Man this post just shows me more and more than the world really is full of diverse couples/relationships. But to your question if you want to share your hubby or stick around until he leaves YOU, then go for it!
2016-03-28 23:18:57
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answer #3
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answered by Anonymous
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Go to a women's shelter and file for divorce. He's a mentally abusive, controlling @$#hole. He won't be able to bother you there, or even find you. The courts will make him pay child support and alimony. When it's his turn to see take the kids, if you end up with joint custody, you can ask him to meet you at the police department so you won't have to put up with his crap. If he threatens suicide again tell him to go ahead. He's just using that to keep you trapped. The courts would probably ask you both to go through some counseling but you will have the option of saying no to the counseling. Good Luck!
2007-01-15 11:06:11
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answer #4
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answered by Anise 1
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u are married to the wrong man, and feel stuck because u have 4 kids, and no job, plus he controls everything. giving u no power or opinion at all. he also makes fun of u, so how could u love a man like this. suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem. u can get out of this, u need to leave him, go back to family, file for child support, get a job, get some therapy, practice unconditional self assurance for yourself, don't measure your self worth by other people, as it will only hurt your self worth, and make u feel as if u can't change your life. don't allow him to treat u like this, stand up to him, unless u are afraid of abuse, but definitely get away from this life. being alone is better than living like this.
2007-01-15 11:10:28
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answer #5
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answered by jude 7
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Your husband has you right where he wants you. It's called always having to be in control, a power kick, so to speak. Your husband has some very deep seeded problems. You need to get out of that situation as soon as you can. He's got things to hide, thus he put a filter on the computer. Shame on his mom for actually bragging about his always being in control. I am guessing that he is following in his dad's footsteps, as it's learned somewhere. He wants you out of circulation with everyone even your family. You need your family now more than ever. Get in touch with a family member & go get some counseling. Please, don't let this man take away the rest of your independence. He obviously feels threatened if you were to have your independence. I think your life is difficult enough, & you don't need anymore mouths to feed, if you catch my drift. It won't be easy to get out of this man's clutches but it is possible, with careful planning. Make a plan to get help or take the children to a safe haven, then get help. You need your family more than ever. get help for yourself, don't wait, & once you're feeling good about yourself, you'll feel stronger mentally & physically, & you can do make a life for your children & yourself, away from this man.
You can do it!!!! Take care of yourself, no one else will. Do it for the sake of your children too.
2007-01-15 11:29:15
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answer #6
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answered by Shortstuff13 7
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It sounds like you both need counseling help of some sort...would he consent to that?? When people control, they usually have abuse issues from the past of some sort. If you don't get some help, your children are going to grow up with some big problems ...and I am sure you don't want that for your children. If they are boys, they will treat women the way your husband treats you and if they are girls, they will put up with bad treatment like you are doing.
You could try going to Al-Anon for a starting point...or look into a women't shelter in your area where you could go with the children and get a fresh start...particularly if he does not want help.
You deserve a better life, and so do your children. I wish you well...
2007-01-15 11:15:38
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answer #7
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answered by mynickname 3
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Oh my god!! What a horrible situation you are in! There is nothing you can do to change this horrible man, and my suggestion is to get your children and your self out of there as fast as you can. He seems to be very destructive towards you and that will not stop with you children. You have health reasons as well why you should get yourself out of there. You should pack up your 4 children while he is at work and stay with family and not tell him where you are staying. I would send divorce papers by mail. Good luck!
2007-01-15 11:39:37
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answer #8
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answered by GIRL 2
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Wow four kids in 3 years....at least one part of your marriage is working. Sounds like you need to make some decisions for yourself. Is this really how you want to live? What are your other options? Would he be willing to make some changes? Answers those things honestly to yourself and you will know a lot more about where you are at and where you need to be going.
Good luck.
2007-01-15 11:06:47
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answer #9
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answered by Airlantiss 2
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he is treating you like a dog.....and obviously your not one.....i was in an abusive relationship and got out...you need to get a part time job and then work your way up to full time....you are not his slave and he needs to treat you with more respect and you need to stand up too him and tel him not to treat you like this.....he is only doing it because you let him and if you show him your not going to take it any more he may take it out on you so when you get the part time job save your money and buy you a car then save for rent for a apartment then get the he** away from this crazy control freak and you can make it with out him....no one said that women need a man to survive this world.....many women have walked in your and my shoes and have made it but many look for the same type of control in a man.....please get out before its too late....your children do not need to see you like this and you need to look for happiness in your children to make it through this and you will see light at the end of the tunnel......wish you the best of luck if you need support please email me and do not think your a burden i am willing too help you through this.....
2007-01-15 11:15:29
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answer #10
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answered by wendy p 3
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