I just found out that my fiance of a year has genital herpes!!! He has had them for about 6 years, far before me. He didn't tell me because he was scared I couldn't love someone who had genital warts. Which ptobably means he knew I wouldn't sleep with him. He told me three months nto our relationship. Since he told me I have been too scared and mad to sleep with him anymore. I love him dearly and people cannot change their past. I am being sill I know that but what do I do? I don't want to get what he has. I can I possibly spend the rest of my life with someone with this illnessa nd not expect to get it myself. HELP!!!!!
2007-01-15 09:59:35 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I have very little experience with STDs, however I looked it up and found a few links that might be able to help you and your fiance deal with this problem.
The first link is to a government website that gives a few facts about genital herpes. Furthermore, it says that they're working on a vaccine to prevent genital herpes. So there is hope! At the bottom of the page, there are some more links and some toll free numbers that you can call to get more information.
I hope you and your fiance can work through this. Good luck to you both!
2007-01-15 10:09:27 · answer #1 · answered by Avie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I got clinically diagnosed with herpes (type 2) about three yrs ago, whilst I was still attending college and had a foolish one-night stand. I understand a lot of young women say this, but I swear I had never done that sort of thing before. I just made a mistake that one time and all of a sudden I felt like I was going to have to live with the implications for the rest of my life. The worst part was feeling I could never date guys again. In the end, who wants to go out with someone who has sores around her "you know what" area? But since a friend shared this video https://tr.im/WwFjm everything improved.
Not only was I able to eradicate all remnants of the herpes virus from my body in less than 3 weeks, but I was also able to begin dating again. I even met the man of my dreams and I'm so lucky to write that just a week ago, in front of everybody in a busy restaurant, he got down on one knee and proposed to me!!! This program gave me back the opportunity to be happy and experience true love again. Now I hope that I can help others by sharing this story.
2015-09-25 00:22:37 · answer #2 · answered by Jayde 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not judging but not only do you have the genital herpes issue, you have an honesty issue. You say he was scared to tell you because he felt you couldn't love someone with herpes. But has he been dishonest about other areas of his life. Some people say it's not lying when they keep something from you but it's still a lie by omission.
Don't start your married life out with lies, it will only get worst. You sound really scared of this, your feelings are valid so trust yourself. If you love him enough to look the other way on his lie, then that's a decision you should make now about the longevity of your married life with him.
2007-01-15 10:53:56 · answer #3 · answered by Alaska Angela 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, have you slept with him yet? If so i would say it's to late, and i think he should have told you long before now,,, that is just wrong. And if you were doing anything i hope you had protection, i agree no one can change their past but, what happens now is the point, if you love him you just need to try and stay on protection (all the time) or better yet have him wrap it,,, any disease is not a good thing, if you are strong enough, and you love him enough you and he will find away. So sorry and good luck
2007-01-15 10:11:45 · answer #4 · answered by sweetemtation_123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He should have disclosed the fact before you slept together. I would give it some serious thought before I contiued the relationship. Do you love him enough to over come this obstacle? What limitations does this set if you are afraid to sleep with him? This will definiatly cause a new set of problems down the road. If you love him enough visit a doctor together to get all the facts and information to lessen the possability of tranmission. Do not be afraind or embarassed to ask all the questions you want because this will greatly affect your life.
2007-01-15 10:19:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice, go speak to your doctor for information on this. There are many wrong things said about genital herpes. Also good idea to look it up on google. Since your boyfriend told you, I would believe that he truly does care about you, and trusted he could confide in you. I know of a few people in this same situation, that lead a wonderful happy and full relationship since full knowledge was sought, and they know how to cope with this situation without it interfering or causing any problems with their partner. Just think, people has dealt with alot worse things than this, and are still together! Truly this is not reason enough to break off this relationship, afterall, you said you love him dearly, so go forward, get educated, and show him you love him unconditionally.
2007-01-15 11:03:55 · answer #6 · answered by GentleSoul 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a problem as long as you remember to use protection every time.
In the future, if you do want to get pregnant and have unprotected sex, you will most likely contract the disease. With the treatments that are out there now, though, it's not a big deal, and the symptoms are really minimal. It's not like you'll pass it to your children, either. Herpes won't detract from your sex life in any way.
2007-01-15 10:08:00 · answer #7 · answered by John C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As Dear Abby might say, what would make your life better? Staying with him and having a limited or a non-existent sex life? Perhaps he is worth it and if so, that says a lot. If you feel betrayed by his late disclosure of his condition, then you have to decide if you can overcome that.
2007-01-15 10:07:10 · answer #8 · answered by Bob T 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you should break up and move on....
You will eventually catch it if you continue the relationship.
2007-01-15 10:30:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋