Why is it that women who were molested as young girls have problems with relationships as they get older?

Question

How do you correct the issue? And don't say get some professional help....

Answer 1

Why? That is a ridiculous question.... it can never be corrected completely and will always leave a scar... people can heal and move on if they deal with their issues, either spiritually, or by talking about it. Women are delicate flowers and must be nurtured- love and support+time heals a lot of wounds.Try listening to her. Be there for her emotionally. Make her feel special by doing sweet little things to give her reassurance. Things that are terrible that happen to kids go into their foundation of being. Professional help is underrated but so is a good conversation and a hug.

Answer 2

Sorry, but getting help is the only way we have. Sort of like our justice system. It's the only one we have, so you have no choice. A woman has to understand why this happened, why she was not at fault, and how to trust again. Get rid of flashbacks, fear, etc. If a person can do that without seeing a therapist, good for them, but if you need the help, then she needs to get the help. Maybe she has some really level headed friends that will listen, and offer some helpful suggestions. But does her friends have experience with this type of situation, and will they offer the correct suggestions? I wonder....... Seeing a professional is not as misunderstood as it use to be. Would you hold it against someone if you knew they were seeking help? To me, that's the most sane thing a person can do.

Answer 3

Because betrayal and sexual exploitation during various times of development rob women and men of their comfort, trust, idealism, aspirations, life...... If a person is rear ended in an intersection while stopped and seemingly safe - don't they also have a residual affect while in cars? If yor're home is robbed, wouldn't it be normal to feel insecure there, less than safe? Isn't it odd that we should think that there shouldn't be something terribly wrong with a person after they've been broken to the point of 'leaving' their body and losing a sense of value in it thus throwing it away to others and to added forms of sexual disgust? My gosh, the physical expression of love is supposed to be a beautiful experience and it's constantly being tainted by the media! If you know someone that needs guidance or direction - I loved the book, Haunted Marriage. It is sooooooo good for any survivor or friend or spouse of survivor to absorb!

Answer 4

Not all molested girls have problems, but alot do. Most problems are related to the fact that molestation is a violation of and important trust during childhood. Molested girls also tend to confuse sex with love, physical acts with emotion and tend to be more promiscuous as a result.
Professional help is not required, but it is advisable. Trying to deal with your own emotional issues tends to be like performing your own brain surgery. I found that a therapist was a good idea. Finding a good therapist can be difficult. You need to find one you are comfortable with and can talk to. The point of talk therapy is to shed light on behavior we ourselves can't see that is harming us. At times, you can get similar results talking through things with a friend.

Answer 5

All of them don't. They are the ones who accept what has happened and get on with their lives, they are the ones who know they cannot undo what has happened. The only thing that holds them back is themselves. Yes, many do seek professional help; others such as myself never did. I decided to do the above. It was the best thing I have ever done. In order to heal you have to first accept. Once you accept you have to forgive yourself even if you did nothing. You must never take blame for what you never did.
May I say that my marriage is great and yes in the personal faction of sex.

Answer 6

That just isn't true. Almost every single woman I know has been molested or raped, and less than half of them have trouble in relationships.

Answer 7

Not all molested girls have problems later in life and some
women who have relationship problems falsely blame it on childhood molestation...
Or use it as an excuse for other problems....

Answer 8

They grew up in a household where abuse, sexual and otherwise, was the norm. That's the only life they've known. The only good way to cure it is professional help. (Sorry.)

Answer 9

I suffered through it. Abuse like that will make you perceive men as brutal,nasty dogs who only want what you have between your legs.
This is why I taught my daughter (age 8) to wait till she is married to preserve her body and reputation.
As women of color, we need to be more careful sexually than white women because the labels
slut and whores affects us the most.
Listen to any hip-hop cd and see how men of color really feel about us.

Answer 10

they're always expecting their trust to be violated, and place most of their self-worth on a strictly sexual level. best way to get over it, is know your true self-worth, trust your instincts, don't give in, never give up, and then, you will be able to trust again. not easy, but worth the effort and struggle.