Why do I cry whenever I try to express myself?

Question

I feel like something is wrong with me. It's hard for me to express myself in front of large groups of people without crying. There are so many things I've wanted to do like public speaking but haven't ever been able to do that because I would get so nervous that I would start crying. Is there anything I can do to get over my anxiety?

Answer 1

First of all don't listen to Jess, that was an insensitive comment that he made. It's hard to stand up there with all the eyes on you, wondering if they are judging you. Toastmaster's is an excellent suggestion, they will give you feedback that is very positive, that will encourage you.
It is possible that you have something in your past that is fueling your fear, receiving harsh judgement or criticism, worth investigating. Just know that most people in your audience are afraid of public speaking also (even if they hide it well) and want you to do well!

Answer 2

Before the speech: Practice your speech in front of a mirror. Seeing your reflection will give you a similar feeling to actaully presenting in front of a large crowd. Practice in front of family and friends, too, so you will get used to speaking to other people.

A little bit before going on: Take a few deep breaths. Just close your eyes and relax a bit, try to think positive and release the tension

During the actual presentation you don't have to look people right in they eyes if it makes you nervous, just look up at a wall in the back, or a tree or something that makes look like you are making eye contact. Don't be embarassed to look at your note cards if you haven't memorized what you want to say, just make sure you don't loose your place by holding a finger where you left off. If you feel tears coming on, take a short pause and breathe and think positive. Remember to speak slower and louder than you think you are, because being nervous will make you speed up and quiet down. If you accidently make a tiny mistake, pretend it never happened, and the crowd might not even notice.
hope these tips help.

Answer 3

As someone who has a similiar problem rather than an expert, I have to say I don't think there's anything you can do but forget about doing anything that involves public speaking :)

I don't know if I'd cry or not because there's just no way I'd ever be in a public speaking situation in the first place (!). I once had a presentation that I was supposed to make at my job, and I was secretly planning to just leave the job and never come back because I just knew there was no way I could do a presentation to a huge group of people. (Fortunately - I got laryngitis because of a cold I had had. God must have been watching out for me!)

When I was a kid I was a really good reader, but if we had to read aloud I'd actually shake and be really close to crying (for no reason I could figure out).

There are, I guess, programs and therapy and medications that are said to help; if its really something you want to overcome. Maybe the fact that you want to do public speaking at all says that you have an edge over someone like me, who has just written off all things involving public speaking.

I have wondered what causes it, and I made it a point to try to help my (then) little girl overcome a tendency toward shyness by putting her in dancing school when she was very, very, young. I think children who have this tendency need to overcome it when they're very little or else maybe their brains just kind of get "shaped" in a way that makes it a very ingrained problem. I've often wondered if there is some similarity between this and maybe a very, very, mild form of autism (although, as you can see, I'm extremely verbal).

When I've heard of people who say, "Imagine people in their underwear" I think how ridiculous that is; because, for me, it isn't a matter of feeling an audience would be judging me or of having low self-esteem myself. My point is that people who think its something like a self-esteem problem don't realize it isn't.

I think - if you really want to overcome it - you ought to talk to someone (a psychiatrist) who specializes in this type of thing and who understands that it most likely is not a psychological issue as much as it is a physiological response.

I, personally, like to think there isn't anything particularly "wrong" with me. I like to think its just a matter of having a shy personality that I've overcome in all ways except public speaking and the like. You are among many, many, people who have this; so you're not alone. It is, I've learned, a tough one to overcome, though. Still, if you really want to overcome it I find it hard to believe that you would not be able to.

Answer 4

Practice, practice, practice.

You are highly sensitive; that's not a bad thing but it can get in the way of communicating. Try not to leave your emotions interfere; focus on saying the words without thinking about the issue or meaning of the words.

I wrote this with a bit of glare in my eye.

Answer 5

Your not alone. Even the President tears up on many speaches. It has to do with your inner heart and how sensitive you are toward humanity. The only prevention is to avoid speaking on heartfelt issues or practice the speach and visualize being stoic.

Answer 6

Yes, just keep trying. I used to be that way and I just kept doing it until I was not anxious about it anymore. You are an emotional person and most likely sensitive. Keep trying.

Answer 7

You are a very emotional person who feels deeply. Give yourself a hug and check out Toastmasters!

Answer 8

I don't know quite how to say this, but perhaps you are a Drama Queen.

Answer 9

not to sound mean...but what about therapy...they are doctorsand may help you with your dilema