My husband and I rarely communicate.We really dont have much to talk about.We just seem to pass each other up when passing.We rarely talk,and if we do its about nothing.There is no sex,we rarely even tell each other we love each other any more.
2007-01-15 08:36:38 · 18 answers · asked by bluenikki2000 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Try talking about something that interests him, or about your past vacation or memories that will bring back the feelings and may lead to more conversation. Or start a new activity that both of you are involved in and it will be something new to talk about, for example dancing classes, or art, or a new sport, but I'm not sure what you enjoy.
For sex, I suggest spicing things up. Surprise him with something he won't expect, like a porno movie or a new toy or just new moves (Cosmopolitan magazine always has a list of fun sex moves).
2007-01-15 08:44:20 · answer #1 · answered by Gist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bluenikki - you have to be the adult in this scenario. you have to teach him.sit down and talk with him. tell him your feelings. tell him that which have observed. tell him about the no sex bit. tell him.
how much do you talk with him? by your paragraph it seems just as little as he does with you. so, you're at an impass and someone - that'll be you- needs to take the lead.
turn off the tv. take all cell phones and put them in another room. turn off the radio and all music. turn off the computer. take your land line telephone off the hook. have nothing that can be distracting in the vacinity. look him in the eye, take a deep breath and go for it. talk. and don't let him interrupt or interject until you are done.
marriage counseling. maybe a pastor. something has to break this log jam or everyone will be hurt. take it from me. i was the log jam and i'm a hurting, divorced woman.
so, teach him. talk to him. why did you marry?
2007-01-15 09:30:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be vocal and let him know that you aren't happy in this situation. See if something is bothering him, or if he is happy with the way things are. You didn't mention how long you have been married, but I think if it is a lot of years, some distance might occur, but nothing as extreme as what you have mentioned. Maybe suggest a vacation that has fun activities that you both can do together?
2007-01-15 08:41:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Free time together would be nice what would you both do before married? ask him to go out get a movie have a bite something that gives you the chance to communicate. If it's night out shopping hold his hand and remind him that you love him, men have hard time saying the things they want to. If you think there is a problem wiggle your way into finding out you should know the man better than he knows himself!
2007-01-15 08:52:02 · answer #4 · answered by Donna M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to communicate to him how you are feeling and then you also need to become a good listener and listen to him when he tries to talk and communicate to you as well.... You both may very well need marriage counseling and help so this marriage does not fall apart on you... Love him where he is at and just be the wife you know you need to be for him.... If you treat him right i have a feeling that he will return the love back to you and love you for you.... We as wives need to learn to love and cherish our husbands and to admonish them and more then likely they will do that for us in return.... You both may very well need marriage counseling too... I am here if you need to talk at any time and here is a great site for help if you need it http://www.marriagetoday.org Also you may also want to go to Doctor Phil's website and find his and Robin's marriage website off of there.... Hope this helps you some and I sure hope you marriage can start to heal and get better.... Hugs to you.
2007-01-15 08:45:23 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get out of the rut you are stuck in.
Take a weekend away just the 2 of you. Go some where new and explore and find things to do together. Make it a weekend that is just about the 2 of you.
Good Luck
2007-01-15 08:43:43 · answer #6 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage goes thru many stages. Try to find where the stresses are. If after looking at that and trying to bring it up and it still doesn't work, it may be time to move on.
2007-01-15 08:41:09 · answer #7 · answered by ♦♦pixiechix♦♦ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like neither of you wants to rock the boat here. Can you remember a time when it wasn't this way? Describe this time in detail like where you were, what you were doing, what you were wearing, your hairstyles, body condition, work status, financial security, kids....?
Review what was lost and try to recover those things.
2007-01-15 08:46:46 · answer #8 · answered by El Pajaro Loco 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if this gets any quieter then this marriage will just wink out, sort of like a burned out light bulb. Have you ever thought of getting you and him involved with something you both enjoy, dancing, volunteering, movies, . Find something before it is to late
2007-01-15 08:42:48 · answer #9 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell your husband how you feel. If I had told my wife how I felt and worked things out I would still be married.
2007-01-15 08:40:57 · answer #10 · answered by nshappe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋