Any experiences? Or info?
2007-01-15 08:35:23 · 15 answers · asked by Kat 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
i have an experience actually that is the perfect example for this. once i knew this guy who i helped out alot. when i say ALOT i mean alot. and naturally i liked the attention he gave me as a result and from good friends we went a step beyond..its a long story really but in that short time during which our relationship transformed, we did absolutely nothing of the sort that you can imagine. however, my reputation still went down and he exploited me, then got bored of me. i actually "broke up" with him yet he told everyone it was vice versa. sorry i cant even fully describe it all to you. its been said too many times. by now it is all rehersed but too much to type lol. o well just know this though.
my grandfather always tells me "DONT BE SO BITTER THAT SOMEBODY SHOULD SPIT YOU OUT BUT DONT BE SO SWEET THAT SOMEBODY CAN CHEW YOU UP"
and ii have learned what indifference is now. some people if you are too nice to will not think twice before exploiting you. it is really sad. that does not mean it is ok to be rude to them however. show indifference for indifference is the opposite of love. help people as much as you can but when they demand you dignity from you then you will know they are taking advantage of you.
your dignity is something you cannot give to anyone. and the person that tried to take it from you does not respect themselves and the person that cant respect themself cannot respect anybody.
2007-01-15 08:48:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel victim to this all the time. I personally believe you could never REALLY know if someone is taking advantage of you, but I think it could be when they start to seem distant. When you always have a smile on your face and look for the good in everything, and they do not honor that anymore. It begins to feel like everything you are and what makes you the person you are is not recognized as it should be. That is my personal take. And trust me, it is not a good feeling.
2007-01-15 16:40:55 · answer #2 · answered by LOVER 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you take your clothes off and there are footprints on the back.
Honestly, if you are concerned someone is using you, ask them for a big favor and see what they say.
My personal experiences consist of bending over backwards to help people who I thought were my friends only to need assistance and all of a sudden they are too busy or just stop talking to me.
2007-01-15 16:42:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
As soon as yo start feeling uncomfortably, or even worse, angry with yourself, then it is the time to realize that you are being too nice and evidently people will start taking advantage of you. Even unconsciously!Remember that all extremes, all "too much" is no good!
2007-01-16 08:35:46 · answer #4 · answered by Alice in Wonderbra 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
being nice is great! u should draw the line when..
a. people repeatedly"forget" their work and must copy yours
b. the same crowd asks you to do things for them all of which you get in trouble for
c. the same people pick on you for no good reason
im not saying abandon ur niceness and become confrontational, just dont be a doormate all the time. if someone crosses the line maybe let it slide that time. if i happnes again, speak out. it feels good to stand up for yourself and your friends (take it from someone who knows).
2007-01-15 16:45:24 · answer #5 · answered by blondeballer 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes when I want to feel generous, or by being nice.... sometimes letting your guard down a lot, may cause others to sense a weak link somewhere and take advantage..
2007-01-15 16:44:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you ge the feeling that you are giving and not getting. It's not subject to formula because one may be needier for a time and it's perfectly OK to be a giver for an exptended period but you need to feel that, if the situation were reversed, the other would be a giver for an extended time.
2007-01-15 16:42:59 · answer #7 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this happens to me all the time. I am a technical kind of person which I take in all the facts and I use logic deduction which I find and figure out problems or help others, but when it comes to charging for my services.. "I am no good."
I am no bill clinton ... I can't be like that, lie to people.. It's just not me..
Big Frank
2007-01-15 23:51:14 · answer #8 · answered by FXM65 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When the money runs out. I was in the Navy and used to get checks for thousands of dollars for reenlistment bonuses. They are all your friends until the money runs out and there is no coat tails to ride on.
2007-01-15 17:34:12 · answer #9 · answered by Janso 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you just know..its a gut feeling....they ask for things more frequently like a favor..because they know the "XX' person wont do it for them but you will... People are hypocrites...everyone wants everything for free..there not just wasting there time there being nice to you..they want something..
2007-01-15 16:40:57 · answer #10 · answered by RoseOfTheEnvious 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋