I'm really struggling with moving on. I am in therapy, individual, and group. I also take medication, but I'm still having a hard time. How do you or did you get past the feelings of being inferior and unloveable?
2007-01-15 08:34:43 · 6 answers · asked by GAgirl 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
It's been 2 years, and I have come a long way. I guess my biggest problem is that I met someone, and fell in love. I really messed things up because I couldn't trust his love for me, and I pushed him away. He is the first man since this happened that I am not scared of physically. We are going to try being friends and see what happens, but I'm not sure how that will work.
2007-01-15 08:58:40 · update #1
I hate to say this, but NO ONE can answer this question but you. I know these things you are doing seem like they aren't doing anything for you and you feel almost desperate to be "normal" again, but it will take time and you will have to be patient, but that doesn't mean you can slack off and just let the healing happen, you have to work at it. One day, you will be going about your business and realize that you placed the money in the cashiers hand instead of placing it on the counter to avoid touching him. Then you will be laughing with a guy and realize you aren't scared of him... They may be small steps, but they will get you to where you are going. Hang in there and just keep living every day.
2007-01-15 08:50:39 · answer #1 · answered by vlfranklin1999 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
So sorry to hear about what happened to you, but you can and will be normal again. It took me about 5 years to really move on, my rapist was a family member so that compounded the problem in ways. Finding forgiveness was key in my recovery, or else I would have just stayed angry forever. If you have found a good therapist don't stop going until you feel ready. I was shuffled from therapist to therapist (free clinic) so I had to retell my story and that was hard so I gave up. The sooner you can quit feeling like a victim and be the owner of what happened and how you let it affect your life the better. I had a hard time letting go and I now regret that I spent so much time feeling very very sorry for myself. Consider meditation, just sitting and repeating a reassuring phase with your eyes closed in a quiet room can help clear your head. Good luck with your recovery, I hope you get all of the help and support that you need.
2007-01-15 08:53:07 · answer #2 · answered by Tracy L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time heals all. Over time I got better. As a child I felt ashamed and embarrassed of what happened to me. Now I know better. It took a lot of time and help to get me here, but it was worth it. Stay in your therapy. It helps more than you'll ever know. Your smart, and beautiful. Don't let the bad things that happened to you in the past decide your future.
2007-01-15 09:01:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time hun, time. Some people never 100% get over it, some do in different ways. It's been over 3 years for me and I found a better guy so the time and my man now has help A LOT, don't give up hope and tell yourself everyday you'll get over it, life goes on, s*$% happens, it wasn't your fault, etc. GOOD LUCK! Be STRONG!!!
2007-01-15 08:40:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is always with you in one form or another. You just have to learn to cope with the memories and feelings that are left after a horrible experience. My best friend was gang raped when she was a teen, about 40 years ago, she still have some residual effects - like not wearing low cut clothing. I wish you well.
2007-01-15 08:42:57 · answer #5 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well as a normal man who does not do those things, I truely hope you will be able to get beyond that. I am sorry that you were the victim of a cowardly ***. I hope someday you will know that not all men are bad. Good luck, my prayers are with you
2007-01-15 08:45:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋