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i'm really heart broken at this moment and i don't know what to do please i could use a good advise i meet a guy 3 yrs ago he had just broken up with his ex like almost a year and we started dating then we move in together although he always talked to her because she will call i told him i didn't like it and he stop then a few months later we got a house together and the a new car and then some land 2 yrs later i get pregnant and we get married big wedding , church and all and now that the baby is 3 months old he saids he is confused and started talking to his ex again and tells me that he loves me but that he is not in love with me and that he is talking to her to see if things will work out and if it doesn't then he will stay with me and i don't know what to do i love him very much and i don't want my child to grow without a father i don't know if i should wait for him or not. or what to tell him to make him snap and realize that he is doing a mistake. she got 3 kid that are not his

2007-01-15 04:20:10 · 9 answers · asked by grisfina79 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

9 answers

buy yourself a pound of self esteem and move on -- he doesn't deserve you -if he wants to see if his other relationship will work or not, he already made it very clear he is not in love with you- who wants sloppy seconds anyways??

move on-- the child will be normal in a 1 parent home, trust me

2007-01-15 04:29:46 · answer #1 · answered by gabby 5 · 3 0

Do not wait for him to make the decision. You make the decision for yourself and get the heck out of this relationship.
You can do better.
Your child can have a father, even if you don't live together.
Why on earth would you accept the fact he isn't sure and maybe Will go back?
That is a slap in the face. Get his stuff together and send him on his way back.
Unfortunately people don't learn by their mistakes. She is an ex for a reason but it might be his lesson to learn.
You have been patient , now you must do what is right for you a nd the child. Do not sit back and let him manipulate your life. Take action a nd get your power and your life back.

2007-01-15 04:34:54 · answer #2 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0 0

Sorry this is happening right after you had a baby. But if he wants to try and work it out with his ex after just having a baby with you and will come back to you if it doesn't work out, I think it is time to move on with out him. If he did come back you will always wonder am I the best he can get, is he just settling with me because his ex and him couldn't make it work. Also he will probably do this to you again, the next time he meets someone else.

It sounds like you and the baby will always be last in his life. He is not worth it. You can do better for you and your baby.

2007-01-15 04:34:37 · answer #3 · answered by T_Ann 2 · 0 0

I really feel for you. If he is telling you that he is not in love with you, then I truly believe it will be in your best interest to ask him to leave. The baby has not idea what is happening, and as long as you let him know that he needs to be part of his child's life, the child will be OK. You on the other hand, should not have to have someone around because it didn't work out with the other. Let him go, and he will realize what you have done and continue to do for him, he will realize that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. As young girls, we have loves that ended, and we get over them. Though we are older, we still get over them. You will feel better about yourself, knowing that there is someone else out there who will love you and be in love with you.

2007-01-15 04:34:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

well you cannot control his actions or decisions, and if he is going to do this, then you can only control your reactions. i don't know what kind of mother wants their child raised in a home with so much disrespect and dislike.
i also don't know why any woman would wait for a man who could treat her like a posession or an object. he has no right to cast you away and then pick you back up again whenever he feels like it.
but you are going to let him do that???? i am so confused. you need to grow some guts and get out of this situation. maybe in the future you guys will have another chance, but you don't have a chance with another woman involved.

2007-01-15 04:33:11 · answer #5 · answered by don't be rude. 3 · 1 0

another sad situation going on here. sounds like he met you on the rebound. he wasnt ready for another relationship but he jumped into one anyway.
that is the dangerous thing about getting with someone who just broke up with someone else . they havent given themselves to time to think and sort out everything that has just happened to them.
many times individuals will get with someone real quick because they dont like the feeling of being alone. even if it means substituting for someone they really wouldnt be with if they took the time to really think things through.
it sounds like you may be in that type of scenerio. i feel bad for you, but it happens. it is obvious by what you say in your writings that this guy wasnt over his ex when you first started out with him.
not a good thing, because now you are bearing the brunt of his haste, plus you both brought a child into the mess too. this poor child will no doubt be the one that has to bear the hurt of it all the most.
there is nothing you can do if this guy goes back to his ex. if a person makes up thier mind to go with someone else, it doesnt matter what you feel. that is the whole tragedy of it all. you are emotionally in love with this guy and he is having first, second and third thoughts about it all.
it doesnt matter whether she has kids that are not his. his vision is on her. waiting for him, may or may not prove fruitful. in any event everyone involved in this scenerio needs to stand strong, because the winds of great hurt are about to prevail upon you.
i am sorry to hear you are in such a horrible mess. i hope that you are a strong prayer person. this may be your only hope.

2007-01-15 04:43:45 · answer #6 · answered by Hawksflyn2u 1 · 0 0

one way or the different so a ways, i have under no circumstances had my heart damaged, i have always achieved the heart breaking...it truly is like you reported now and again worse for me reason I have a tendency to sense mega accountable and stuff....my very last boyfriend thoroughly fell aside after I broke up with him, he did not wanna enable me bypass, so as that grow to be puzzling to address.... :)

2016-10-31 04:14:34 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Truly, let him go and dont go back with him, if he doesnt love you now, he'll not love yo ever....think about you and your baby, he can get visitation every 2 weeks, but really from the bottom of my hart, let him go, is the best thing¡¡¡

2007-01-15 04:35:05 · answer #8 · answered by Lau 1 · 0 0

Tell him you will make that decision for him. Boot him out and let him know you won't settle for this BS nor is he doing you any favors by hanging around.

2007-01-15 05:04:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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