I'm at a crossroads with my best friend. I've known her for almost 7 years. We recently had a bad fight because I decided against living in an apartment with her.
I never saw it before but she can be so bossy and controlling to the point of being obnoxious with it at times. We can be ourselves with one another 80% of the time and we have a lot of fun. She's very eccentric and likes to stay up till wee hours, even if she has to drag me through the night when we hang out. The other day i just called to say hi while I was at work and she's like "Oh you need to check your email I'll let you know when I'm at work and when I'm not." WTH?
I actually feel sorry for her and don't have the heart to tell her this because I know she'll get upset about it. Also, I know when i decide to move out with my boyfriend she's going to hit the roof in a jealous fit. I have to distance myself NOW or..I don't want to break contact with her but how can I imply that I need space from her?
2007-01-15 02:05:04 · 5 answers · asked by asturiasangel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
i've tried to hook her up with guys but she just gets all defensive and thinks all guys thinks she's ugly (she is unattractive, I'm sorry...but uh...)
2007-01-15 02:12:14 · update #1
she has two college classes with me so I see her quite often but other than that I would prefer not to see her.
2007-01-15 02:13:42 · update #2
A gradual distancing probably seems best. Yeah, she'll hit the roof, but if you remain dignified and say that its your decision, your old enough to know what you want in life, if she wants to be a madam about it, then it'll make it easier on you to ditch her anyway. She sounds rather selfish, and although you probably understand her eccentricity more than most, she is playing on your empathy, she needs to realise she cannot control other people. It'll get easier when you leave college anyway. Stick to your guns hun.
2007-01-15 02:29:46 · answer #1 · answered by The Sooz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A TRUE best friend would UNDERSTAND ANY issue you have to discuss with them! She's obviously a controlling person & not very realistic. Even though you know she'll be upset, you cannot remain in her clutches, you must tell her the 2 of you are growing up & changing, maybe even going different directions but that she'll always be your good friend & you'll staying in touch with her is important to you. She'll only hurt herself if she dumps your friendship but usually people like that get over it & all works out in the end. Move on down your own path & keep her in her appropriate place or she'll ruin your chances to move on at all, maybe even ruin your life.
2007-01-15 02:18:00 · answer #2 · answered by SmallVoiceInBigWorld 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you really need to set down with her and explain how you feel in a nice way. Tell her you think both of you should have some space. If she can't accept that than you just have to let her go as a friend.
2007-01-15 02:12:30 · answer #3 · answered by Diane H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
find her a guy of her own that she can boss around and stuff. That will make the transition easier.
2007-01-15 02:09:09 · answer #4 · answered by oldsoftee2001 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
find her a gf since she runs guys off
2007-01-15 02:17:01 · answer #5 · answered by lilac. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋