My 10 yr old son has sex questions already...?

Question

My son had to watch the boy body part movie at school a couple of months ago and he currently has started asking questions about sex. I think that is pretty soon and I am starting to shy away from having to answer. My parents never had the sex talk with me and I ended up pregnant at 16 and having him at 17. I just want to do the right thing but am not sure what that is.

Answer 1

Now is the time to begin talking to him. If you don't answer him, he may seek answers elsewhere.
Just because you answer his questions, does not mean you are condoning him being sexually active or encouraging behavior that you don't expect of him at age 10.
If you need to, check out a book from the library and help him find the answers he is looking for.
Keep the terms you use on a level he can understand at age 10, and do not volunteer more information beyond what he asks for.

Answer 2

OK -- first of all, sex is NOT that big a deal, ok? Almost every single adult walking down the street has had sex at some point (and a LOT of the teenagers, apparently). Put it in perspective, and that will make it easier for you. The less embarrassed you are to talk about it, the more likely it is that she will come to YOU for questions and answers, instead of her friends -- and that's what you want! (It's interesting that parents dread this process, and yet seem to be perfectly ok with the idea that a teacher should be perfectly at ease discussing it with 30 kids at one time!) It sounds like she is exhibiting some perfectly normal curiosity about sex. Have you had the talk about her period, and "becoming a woman", yet? If not, you better do it FAST -- my daughter was 10 when she had her first period! If you're flumoxed on how to do so, try getting the American Girl book "The Care and Feeding of YOU". It has a LOT of information in it with regards to her body, puberty, etc., and it's written at just her level. You do NOT have to give her a "play-by-play" of what sex is like. That's TMI. She's fascinated by the mechanics right now -- "what goes where". Keep it simple and matter-of-fact. A lot of girls her age have no idea what an erection is for a male, because if they've ever seen a penis at all, it's usually been a quick glimpse as Daddy or brother was getting dressed or accidently coming out of the shower. A good start is to ask her what SHE thinks sex is -- it's always interesting to see what kind of misconceptions kids have! You may have to gently correct a mistake, but generally, just keep it simple. A 10 year old does not need to read the Kama Sutra in order to know about how things work! Describing sex is also a way to slip in your own value system with regard to sex, i.e., some people may say, "A man and a woman" -- others may be more specific and say, "a husband and a wife" . . . Good luck!

Answer 3

The right thing is to answer his questions. You don't have to get graphic and everything, but answer the question honestly.

Also, you can pick up some great books at the book store (or online if you are shy) and read them with your son.

Learn from your own lifes lessons. I assure you, that 10 year old knows more than you think he does. Also, it is your responsibility to raise a son who is respectful to not only his own body but to womens.

Give him the talk mom... it's the right thing.

Answer 4

You already know what happens when you don't hear the right information about the birds and the bees...I would say he's old enough to hear the straight talk from you. You can relate your own experience and how it affected you and what you might have done had things worked out differently. Undoubtedly you are glad you had kids and everything, but maybe emphasize that having them so early might not have been the best time. It's better to hear the truth than bits and pieces of falsehoods that can lead him to think "It will never happen to me" simply because he was uneducated.

Answer 5

whoa my little bro. is 10 and had to do Family Life at School. Which is "THE TALK" so thank God that my parents did not have to give him the talk.
Here is some good advice.
Talk to other adults/friends that have given their children "the talk" ask them for ways to explain it and how to tell your son what is right to say or do and what is not. I got the talk at 9 and i was scared half to death about it too. So you might want to have something around that wont scare him or make him saw ewwww. Because he might not be paying any attention so have a little re-cap when the talk is over...just to be safe.

Answer 6

Well the right thing is the exact opposite of what your parents did..think about it. If you want your son to be open with you then you have to start now b/c in about 2 years he won't want to talk to you period, and especially not about sex... I havetold my kids that they can ask me anything and that i will always tell them the truth and we have open sex discussions. Wouldn't you rather they hear the correct info from YOU than every stupid and untrue thing their friends could tell them....such as you cant get preg the first time, have her jump up and down afterwards...If your kids can't talk to you then they WILL take advice elsewhere... and you may be a VERY early grandmother...and P.S. If he is old enough to be asking he is old enough to know the basics.

Answer 7

I watched my first sex ed video at school 3years ago when i was in 5 grade and i turned out fine. I never ever had a talk about sex with my parents but if your so colse to you son if think it is ok to talk to him about it but a less detailed version. If you dont have that talk with him jus make sure you raised him right and you know that he wont make any dumb decisions.

Answer 8

I think you answered your own question because of your personal life experience.

Kids are maturing faster these days then ever before. It is NEVER to early to talk to them about the dangers of drugs or what sex is all about.

At 10, you don't need to do it all in one sitting or be real specific, but you can talk in general terms.

If you start the communication process NOW, your son will feel comfortable to talk with you later.

Answer 9

Absolutely sit down and talk to your son. I learned about sex from kids at school when I was 9, that's not the way to learn. It's not too soon.

Answer 10

You should know the answer to your question just based on your life experience....
If he's already asking questions (which is not unusual at this age) then answer them. Do your best to make the answers age-appropriate but be honest. The more info you give him, the less likely he'll end up repeating your past....