I am asking bc I am 22 and just wondering what happens when I am 25 and my husband wants kids, but we both want and need to work to support ourselves? How do people do it all and still have a life?
2007-01-14 18:29:51 · 15 answers · asked by shell 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
It's a scary thing. I guarantee you that when your first child comes, it will be your number one priority, and everything else just falls into place. You do what you have to because your children need you too. When we had our baby, we were both successful restaurant managers with a killer apartment and living nicely. Since we had our son, I quit my job and stayed home because we didn't want to put him in daycare. We live in a "not so nice" place, but in a safe neighborhood. We aren't exactly "living the dream" but at the same time, we are so in love with our son that it's all worth it. Eventually I'll get back to my career, but in the meantime, my baby needs me. Good luck and don't worry. It all works out.
2007-01-14 18:42:25 · answer #1 · answered by munkees81 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you have kids, you really don't have another life. And if you do go out without the baby or kid, sitters cost alot... As for work and babies. I do it well. The routine is nice... a daycare or nanny or babysitter, and you have time with your child, quality time daily. It is highly cristisized to have children and still work, but if I had kids and didn't work.. my quality of parenting would go down. When you are with your kids all day.. you tend not to use quality time... Just like the saying that busy people get more done... It is true I find.. even at Chrsimtas holidays when the kids are home... by the end of the holidays we hardly spend quality time, but when they are in school, we use our evening to play games, read and catch up... Just follow your heart and don't worry.. the answer will come to you.. if I had the option though, if their was 2 incomes, I would like to only work 3/4 time, not full time
2007-01-14 18:36:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its hard, you will both need to sit down and listen to each others wants and needs and expectations. i am 26 and have a 7 year old son. I have had family help but pretty much I am a single mom. If you have family support and friends willing to help you out are always a good thing. Finding a great sitter or daycare for your little one is a must. It took me a while to find a sitter to watch my son piratically over night while I work. There isn't a Manuel on how to do it, you just find the best avenue for you and your husband and try it, if that doesn't work then you try something else. Your local church may have a list of people that they have worked or a daycare they recommend, just make sure there licensed with the state your in and visit where your going to leave your child, most places will allow you to leave your child for an hour or so, so you can see how they interact or if that place just isn't cosher with you. kindercare.com is a great place they practly potty trained my son and tought him to recognize his name, abc/124 and other things, its a bit pricy but you pay for the education your child receives. making time for yourself and hubby is also a priority, most daycares have a mommys day out or a parents night out you can leave them for a extended time so you can go to dinner and a movie. local orgs also do this just a matter of looking around and go with what makes you comfortable. good luck!!
2007-01-14 18:43:31 · answer #3 · answered by athena9980 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son is 20, has a 2 1/2 year old son.
He works a full time job.
He has primary custody of his son.
They both moved in our home 7 months ago.
He is getting ready to move out again.
He moved home because he had to save money to pay the Lawyer and get a car. His ex got the car, my son got his SON!
Anyway, he does a good job. He sends his son to day care and then I watch him from 3:30 - 5:00, sometimes longer.
My son has a very active life. He gets us to watch him when he wants some time to himself.
You can always look for daycares, maybe family, friends.
As far as have a life, your life will change, in a good way.
2007-01-14 18:40:47 · answer #4 · answered by faith♥missouri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, since you make virtually nothing you should be able to get a lot of financial support. A lot of times hospitals will even write off your bills. As for the dad, I'd get a legal statement from him relinquishing his rights. If you don't he could come back at any time and you could be forced to include him in the childs life. If he refuses to sign a statement then I would get a court ordered paternity test as soon as the kid is born and start collecting child support. It is unfortunate you are in this position. I would have to say if I were you I'd quit your job and get one with benefits. A lot of jobs are pretty flexible. You just need to find one. Maybe somewhere related to your current major that way you can just move right in to a higher position once you obtain your degree.
2016-03-28 22:21:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really have to rely on family and friends. It is A lot of work at any age. I am A stay at home mom,and I still cant seem to catch up or stay even on what needs to be done. I know it is said that you can do it all but, I don't see how. Most kids with two working parents end up being raised by A day care,older siblings.or who ever is around.My advise to you is, work several years,get money in the bank, get some security,then have your children.When you can enjoy them and give them the love and attention that they so richly deserve.
2007-01-14 18:41:58 · answer #6 · answered by foreversmilingirish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well that depends...if your husband wants kids so bad he better make sure that he is going to be taking half of the responsibility of taking care of the baby. He can work midnights and take care of the baby during the day or vice versa. That way the baby won't have to be in daycare at all!! Or better yet, can't he get a better paying job so you can stay home?
2007-01-14 18:36:25 · answer #7 · answered by jessteal2001 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Buy a house now and start making extra payments toward principle. Try to make extra car payments if you have them to pay off your cars and be sure to put at least 5% of your income into a retirement account. If you plan on having a child and you both had to work id hire a nanny. Its better to have a little less money now and be prepared then have no money working 40 hours a week in a couple years. I'm 21, and 3 months pregnant somehow my husband and i have managed to pay off a new house, pay support for my stepson, have a new car and have it payed for and we put money into savings. All of this off of 45,000 a year. It all depends on how much you are willing to put toward the important stuff now.
2007-01-14 18:34:59 · answer #8 · answered by J&A 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel once you have children they are your life. So you will definitely still have a life. You can either let one of your family members or a close friend watch them while you work. You could bring them to a daycare or someone who babysits. The only thing I would recommend is that it is someone you trust. Good Luck.
2007-01-14 18:46:10 · answer #9 · answered by Becky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This will be the easiest question I have ever answered, and the most serious too, it comes naturally, however as far as the "life" part goes,you won't have your life anymore, you can kiss that goodbye, however, I am sure that once you have kids, the new life you find will be much more fullfilling anyway, you won't miss the old one very much.
2007-01-14 18:43:15 · answer #10 · answered by Ms.knowitall 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋