How can I get my dog to not be afraid of me?

Question

I have had Astar for 9 months now. She is approximately under 2 years old and a mix of rotweiler and blue tick. I don't know much about her previous home except that her owners were going to shoot her. Overall she is an excellant dog! (ex. she loves playing fetch/ tug of war, sits, laysdown) The only problem is that when my kids are at school she acts scared of me and sometimes will urinate a little if I approach her. Also she does this when I raise my voice. Besides myself there are three other people in the house but I'm the only one she acts this way towards. I can't understand why or figure out what i can do to help her overcome being scared of me, considering I have never hurt or layed a hand on her. Any advise would be greatly appriciated! Thanks!

Answer 1

This is her way of telling you that she knows you're top dog in the house. This is submissive behavior. Here are some good sites with some excellent advice.

http://www.uvhs.org/behavioral_docs/submissive_urination.pdf
http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/submissivepeeing.htm
And a nice thread on “excitement pee” which is actually submissive peeing. http://www.oes.org/page2/2208~Excitement_Pee.html

(I’d post it, but most is copyrighted. Links, ok, but copying for posting a no-no.)

Answer 2

You don't say if the 3 other people in the house are adults or the kids, male or female. Urination is not only a sign of fear but it is also something dogs do to show submission (their way of acknowledging you are boss). The other possibility is that she has a weakness with her bladder control although this is not as likely if it only occurs around you. If it happens when you raise your voice, my guess would be a submission thing. Try to avoid raising your voice, especially if you are angry. Instead of approaching the dog, squat to her level, call her to you using a quiet happy voice and offer her a treat, give her time as the older a dog, the longer it takes for them to adjust to a new home. If you don't know much of her history, then you need to be doubly patient and assume the worst (that she was abused by someone) and work hard to earn her trust that you wont do the same. Let someone else punish her if she needs it, and you be responsible for her food and a great deal of her play. Give her the good times and she will learn not to be quite so submissive around you. However, dogs ARE a pack animal. When they don't have a canine pack, their human family becomes that pack. All packs have an Alpha leader, and it may always be that YOU are it and she may always exhibit submissive behavior to you.

Answer 3

I had that same problem with one of my shepherds.

When they do the submissive urinating... They are showing the alpha that they are not wanting to take over their position... There are a few things you can do to alleviate the problem

When she is in front of you do not bend over her or lean towards her. Bend your knees into a squat position.. approach her palms up and pet under her chin or on her chest rather than with palms down to pet her on top of her head or back. After the initial approach you may pet her anywhere.

See with dogs.... a dominate dog will place their head over the other dogs neck.. if there is to be a challenge the two will start to "face off".. if not the other one will become submissive and may urinate a little or even roll over belly up. They try to make themselves smaller .... It is the way of the pack....

That should help some & probably more than you think... lol

GOOD LUCK

Answer 4

Dogs do not live in the past. they live in the pack they are part of.

Look up submissive peeing on the web. Bascially when she pees like that she is telling you she knows you are the top dog. You are giving her some signal that makes her think you are about to put her in her place. So she is yelling uncle, before you bite her. I had a dog that greeted people at the door that way. If you need to walk toward her do not look her in the eyes. Look away and ignore her a bit. Look away fast if you see her start to arch her back, cause she is about to pee. It is a dogs way of showing respect.

Answer 5

Well i know for dogs that they are usually afraid of the same sex of human that harm them (or age in regards to children vs adults). I have had dogs before that are terrified of men because they were beaten with newspapers and had their noses rubbed in urine....the list goes on. It is possible your dog was abused by someone similar to your sex and/or size and the dog thinks you may do the same thing. Just be gentle and work towards a bond. Be patient and in time it will come but if you try to rush it you might make matters worse.

Answer 6

Raising your voice is a sign of nervousness and being out of control. She needs to see you as a calm and dominant pack leader. Eye contact when you're upset with her is scary for dogs too. She sounds like she's had a dicey background and needs love and someone she feels confident with. Do you raise your voice at the kids when they're misbehaving? This could be terrifying to her, and when she's alone with you she may see herself as a target (no litter mates to blend in with). Try to use calm authoritive methods around her (and the kids). Take her out for walks and teach her to heel. Walks and training are a good way to bond, and to keep her mind active. She wants to make you happy, that's why she's scared right now. I believe she may be confused about her role( and your role) there in your household.

Answer 7

Think of how you communicate with her...what kind of tone do you use and and are you authoritative? Make sure to get down on her level and communicate in a loving tone. She may connect you with being the bad person if you are the one that punishes her all the time when she does something wrong. Make sure to pass that responsibility around. Next time she does something wrong have someone else punish her.
If you have never hurt her in any way I dont know what else to tell you. If you have then you have already answered your own question.

Answer 8

Maybe you sound or look like someone who abused her in the past. Dogs are very sensitive to tone of voice. Sounding happy to see her when you approach her will help. Try to give your dog affection such as petting. Also, giving her food or a treat when you see her will help appease her fears of you. Eventually, you will win her over. Initially, you'll need to greet her and go to the kitchen cabinet to get a treat and then bring it to her. Eventually, when you greet her, she'll follow you to the kitchen in anticipation of getting the treat. When she starts to follow you (instead of waiting for you to bring the treat to her), you'll know she's learned to trust you. Don't betray that trust by being rough with her. Doing that could send her back into a life of fear of your presence. Love conquers all.

Answer 9

You don`t say what gender u r, but it`s very apparent that she was abused or yelled at in the past by someone of ur sex. Only patience and loving kindness will ease her fears. Never yell or raise ur voice, even to ur children in her presence, as she considers herself to be one of the pack and will think u r yelling at her also. Petting, soft talking, playing, feeding and giving her treats r all the things u can do to overcome her fear of u. Be consistent and patience with her and u`ll win her over.

Answer 10

you just have to be patient! are you a guy or women? she may have had a bad experience with one or the other. just keep trying to show her affection and she will slowley come around.

here is a tip...it may sound wierd but it will help: stick your hand face Down in front of her and speak very softly to her as she approaches she may have her head down... if she shows no sign of aggression just fear gently pet her from the top of her head all the way to her tail... as she becomes comfortable pet her on the inside of her back leg (either one). To a dog this is a sign of affection and should help calm her nerves toward you... But, like i said be patient because its may take a few times before she comes around.