A little advice please !?

Question

Ok...I've been dating my gf (serious relationship) for over a year now, she's 26...and we're long distance right now. This may sound like high school....but nonetheless...she was in the mall with her mom shopping and a couple of guys were checking her out and following them around the mall the entire day. After shopping she went to starbucks with her mom nearby the mall, and the two guys also followed them there, and finally built up the courage to hit on her. She told me she was flattered by the guys approaching her and knew they wanted something more than just a friendship. What bothered me most was instead of letting them down easy, she gave out her phone number to the guys, never mentioning the fact that she has a bf. Her reasoning to me was "they were polite" and that when they call she wouldn't pursue anything. I'm pretty confused with her judgment and am hurt by this. I'm not sure what to say to her...any help would be much appreciated. Thank you for listening.

Answer 1

I did that once... I would never acually do anything with anyone else, and never have to my hubby, but sometimes I have a hard time letting guys down, however I never answer unknown numbers so I have no intention of doing anything because I'm madly in love, but usually I don't really get into the fact that I'm in a relationship unless its necessary (like they creep me out) and I don't know why.
However I'm getting better at it. Maybe it comes with time?

Answer 2

It is terrible thing to see people married who do not trust each other. One usually dominates the other, and the other pays him or her back in some way, or not.
I have been married 31 years and trust is an issue forever. I go where I want, and she goes where she wants and we may ask questions but we also don't follow each other around or panic in some other way.
You should know your girl friend better than you are suggesting. And I bet you do. Sit down and think and feel into it for an half-hour a day. You will in short order figure out what you feel for you.
Then set down and check out what you would be up to if you did the same as her.
Remember however, that you and her are different probably.
Let me suggest that the phone number taking was just a polite thing because they were nice, and ladies like to encourage nice men for the benefit of all ladies.
With my wife, I know her. She will take care of herself and me, and however she does that is OK with me. I give her the right to be herself. It works.
Ladies love deeply and forever if you let them. If not, what do you lose, face?

Answer 3

Long distance relationship is built from a great amount of trust (I'm sure you're aware of that). Knowing people and socializing is part of life. Although in this case, well, i dont know your girlfriend. If she's an outgoing person, maybe what she did (by letting her guard down towards strangers) is normal to her. But if your gf is a shy-girl, it might be a little weird. Bear in mind, every single person would like to be liked, it makes us feel beautiful and interesting. So, maybe you can talk to your gf about you feeling uneasy about her letting her guard down towards strangers (bet you've done so) and she how's her response towards your complain, haha. Anyway, i had long distance relationship before and my gf and i both knew that there will be time when we will meet someone that is more caring, more interesting and for sure, closer. If we still love each other by then, then we go on with the relationship. If not, life goes on.
So, good luck, mate!

Answer 4

You have some problems up ahead, dude! Your 'Girlfriend' is really a 'Player'. If she was in high school yet, I wouldn't worry about it. She's 26 and should be at the point of her life to where she should know what she wants and where she's going. Giving out her phone number tells me she's available.
Your girlfriend sounds like she's craving some major attention. To win her heart totally you have to make seeing her interesting like the first day you met her.It sounds to me like you need to feed her attention craving by sending her gifts, becoming interested in her family and career and most important of all, telling her how beautiful she is to you and how there is no actress out there that makes you blow a nut like she does. P.S.Could you tell me her phone number when you pick this as your best answer?????????

Answer 5

well it's because she will pursue something. she sounds like she wants to play with you too. i mean why would you tell your BF that? to make him crazy. and guess what? it worked. or did she make it up. Would her mother walk around the mall the entire day with two guys following? come on of course not! would your mom?i think you need to crush her little games and find a new girlfriend. She's the type of girl that gives us nice girl a bad wrap. remember all ladies are not like that. and love goes on and on, so get looking!!

Answer 6

Hmm.....is she generally too nice to people? If so, you can explain what a guy thinks when he gets a girl's number (that he's gonna be able to hit it). Also...that's fricking dangerous....they were following her? Who does that? My third thought is why she even told you? I mean, honesty is important, but is she trying to get attention? Are you giving her enough? On the whole, I don't think it says one thing or the other about how she feels about you. If there are no other signs, I'd just chalk it up to a momentary lapse of reason and let it go....

Answer 7

if she was as serious with you as you seem to be with her, then she wouldnt have given out her number. re-evaluate your relationship. but dont just up and dump her, confront and talk to her about it. tell her that what she did upset you a bit and ask how she would feel if you had done that to her. and maybe, because it is long-distance right now she just wants to be close to someone. she'll realize that she made a mistake if you do decide to dump her. but give her a few positive points for actually telling you. it could have just been an innocent thing. good luck.

Answer 8

You are at long distance, and she is lining up possible replacements for when the long distance becomes too much to maintain the relationship.

Do something about it.

Find a locally available replacement.

You do not say how you became distant and if you have any control over moving back, or when - if ever.

Answer 9

first of all it seems like shes not to serious about you...i know that when i was serious about my b/f i wouldnt even look at other guys...dont laugh im being serious....he was the only one i wanted...but since you guys are long distance right now and im guessing that it was you that went away maybe she feels left behind and doubting your love.you seriously need to talk with her and ask her what she wants..maybe shes scared to break it off with you or maybe shes just hurt and trying to fill that gap bacause your not there..but she was in the wrong to give her phone number out..and if she was with her mother she shouldnt have let her either..good luck with your decitions i hope everything works out for the best....

Answer 10

Well maybe she is trying to get ur attention.... Or maybe pressuring you to make a decision. Does she want you to move where she is?.... has this been discussed at all?... I don't think she wants to start something with someone else otherwise she wouldn't have said anything.... But it seems more like she wants you to know that she feels like is running out of time. ask your self if you want to move where she is, see what it si you really want out of the relationship and once you know talk to her.