I have a very stable boyfriend, he works 2 jobs plus his band. But he always makes time for me, I even have the key to his house. I really thought I loved him until he told me because of his past(childhood) he has a hard heart. That he never has feelings like everyone else.
So basically I feel like a dead end with him..he says he cares about me but thats it. But yet he says he will do anything to keep me.
My secret love calls in the middle of the night every now and then, begging me to see him. He says he would of took care of me. That he will ram his self into a tree with his car if he cant ever be with me. When we see eachother its instant passion..I have to avoid him so I wont do anything to get into trouble. But I am scared to admit I want to be with him because the passion seems to unrealistic..like a dream.
2007-01-14 16:48:14 · 12 answers · asked by Navulam 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have known the secret love longer than my boyfriend.... and the tree statement was a figure of speech not realistic.
2007-01-14 16:54:19 · update #1
You really should listen to what your heart is telling to you to do and that sounds like go for the love. He sounds like the one that can fill that void that you have, that you can't get from the other one that will not fully commit to you. Quit wasting your time with him and move on to the one that really wants to be with you. You have no idea what you are missing. But, I would have to mention to him something about the threat of smashing his car into a tree. That's not cool at all and he needs to not think like that. I mean, how are you supposed to take him serious and want to be in a relationship with him if he is going to say things like that. I know I wouldn't want to be in a long term relationship with someone that thought like that so, make that clear to him that you don't like it when he talks like that before you actually make any kind of promises to him. Don't be scared of something that could be wonderful for you. Go for it and accept that passion with open arms. You have no idea what you are missing out on until you atleast give it a chance.
2007-01-14 17:01:48 · answer #1 · answered by airtightreality 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy, your passion, is not stable enough to be in a relationship. The thing about the car is a prime example. What you need to do is evaluate your life. Do you love or even like your current b/f or are you obsessed with this new guy? If you are obsessed with the new guy then I don't know. He is crazy, but you sound a bit eccentric yourself so maybe you would be a perfect match. Just please, don't hurt your current b/f no matter what you do unless he has hurt you. I'm a guy, and the reason good guys are hard to find, is because of girls like you.
2007-01-14 16:55:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be honest and decide which one of these guys you want, because you cannot have both. Your choices are the stable guy that is always busy at work that you know really does like you or you have the kind of unstable secret guy that you feel very passionate about. Do you want love (the boyfriend) or lust (your secret lover)? That is the question you have to answer.
2007-01-14 16:55:31 · answer #3 · answered by msi_cord 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to follow your heart.
I heard a really good quote the other day that I think you need to think about a little bit: "If the relationship is a secret, you shouldn't be in it".
You can't have the "best" of both worlds...If you play with fire, you'll probably get burned.
2007-01-14 16:51:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend needs to take care of himself first before he can take care of you, otherwise you are at a dead end relationship. He needs to talk to a counselor. He has issues. Until he fugues them out, he will not be with you or visa versa. Your other night in shinning armor...I don't know how old he is. It's kinds difficult helping you when I don't know his or yours age. Anyways, good luck :)
2007-01-14 16:55:30 · answer #5 · answered by rspheart 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your secret love sounds like me when i was in middle school. someone that would run his car into a tree if he's not with you? wow, sounds like total bull. go find a hobby.
2007-01-14 16:52:36 · answer #6 · answered by sd_waterman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sound like you need to be honest with your self if you are
having feeling for some one else then you need to be honest
with your boyfriend and let him know this. he just may not
know how to express his feeling because of things in his past.
but honest is the best approach with him and then you can
make the right decision for what need to be done.
2007-01-14 16:56:05 · answer #7 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This new thing could work or it could not. You shouldn't think about him when you make your descion. If you didn't have the other guy, would you leave or stay with your bf? Do that.
2007-01-14 16:52:58 · answer #8 · answered by I_am_me___ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you are getting anywhere with your bf. I think you should find someone who loves you.
2007-01-14 16:51:39 · answer #9 · answered by Amberlee :D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well... if ur boyfriend doesnt love you, or you dont love ur boyfriend, then dont hurt urself by making urself stay with someone u dont want to be with.
2007-01-14 16:54:34 · answer #10 · answered by Jillibean 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋