shes diognosed with a mental disorder and she gets verry angry for no reason.she is trying to get help and I still lover her she has my 2 children and I want to know what to do?
2007-01-14 16:30:57 · 26 answers · asked by turcotte1976 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Because of the children you should do everything you can to make this work. Maybe her doctor can offer you some good advice also, go with her to her next appointment and talk about this. You always have to think about your kids. They did not ask for this and are truly innocent victims in this. You have to at all cost think of them first.
2007-01-14 16:35:35 · answer #1 · answered by doris_38133 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Depending on what "mental disorder" she has, it's possible that's what drove her to have an affair - it's not necessarily that she doesn't love you, she just wasn't thinking straight and it made her feel good for a little while.
If we're talking years ago, get over it and just get on with your lives. If it's more recent though, decide if it's likely she's going to hurt you again. Did you know the guy? That would make it very hard to get over.
Ultimately, don't stay together for the kids. I know that's the direct opposite of what most people think they should do, but coming from a family that would have worked a hell of a lot better if my parents had just divorced when I was little, I can tell you it's not worth staying together if the benefit to your kids is just that you're both around all the time. If that time is spent fighting and there's no love in the house anymore because of what she's done, then it's just time to move on.
2007-01-14 16:37:23 · answer #2 · answered by RIffRaffMama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheater, always a cheater. If you are able to live with that, and her mental disorder then continue your relationship. If the cheating bothers you and/or her anger problem, then get out of the relationship. You will always be the father of your children, but you do not have to be with the mother of your children if it is too painful for you. You deserve someone who will be loyal and treat you right.
2007-01-14 16:35:53 · answer #3 · answered by newmum06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mental illness has nothing to do with cheating-And if she gets angry for no reason I would be worried about my children being in harms way. Even if you still love her think of the children's safety-Tell her she either goes to get professional help and stops cheating or you will leave with the children.
2007-01-15 17:24:45 · answer #4 · answered by ekalatucka 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she deserves a second chance. first, think about your kids. how old are they? if you kids are less than 5 years, try to fix the relationship. the kids are still young to be in a position were they didn't choose. they need guidance for now especially if their mom is like that. the kids need you.do it for them. but it doesn't mean forever. if after giving her a chance to change and things are still the same and if you're not happy anymore, then you gotta decide on how you guys could live separately without affecting your kids. love is not the only thing you need in the relationship. you need respect too. and happiness. not all people who loves are happy. they're suffering from inside. and it eventually leads to a situation wherein you don't want to go on. so, before it comes to that point try to weight things for awhile by giving her a second chance to change. and try to see if you can live with her the rest of your life & see if you see yourself living with her happily for a long time. good luck.forget the past.
2007-01-14 16:49:28 · answer #5 · answered by K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never good to cheat on anyone but sometimes things happen that should not. If you love her with all your heart, I think it would be good to sit down and talk about it. If that does not help but you both are committed to staying together, maybe seek family counseling. The most important thing Is not to do is insult her. Some people that cheat may not regret it but I can probably say that more people that have cheated don't feel to good about hurting the one they love. Or about them self's. Good luck dear.
2007-01-14 16:43:56 · answer #6 · answered by lost angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on how much you're willing to endure in the name of love. And you have to consider that if it's almost unbearable to be with her for you, how hard is it on the kids to witness her angry mood swings? It might be worth it for your kids sake, so they could have at least one stable rock to cling to during all this. And you may have to protect them from her as well, it depends on how violent she could become during an episode. And to see a parent lose control like that is detrimental to a child. Think about staying with her, at least until the kids are grown. Then you'll know inside that you really did do everything you could to help. It'll be tough no matter what you decide. Good luck
2007-01-14 16:38:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
why did she cheat? was it due to mental disorder? if she cheated just because she felt like it at the time, you don't need to be with her. your first concern should be with the children. if her mental disorder causes her to become angry for no reason, you should consider what can happen to the children if she gets angry at them for no reason. i understand she is getting help, but the children should come first. if protecting the children means being with her, then that is what you should do. consider getting custody if she ever does anything to harm a child. love sometimes means making tough choices, but love her enough to walk away if you need to.
2007-01-14 16:40:30 · answer #8 · answered by bbme 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is a deal breaker for me, but if you are willing to forgive her and help her get help and she's willing to be with you, then work it out. Especially where there are children involved. But, listen, children are very perceptive and will know if something is wrong with your relationship. So both of you need to give it a hard and honest try for their sake. Good luck!
2007-01-14 16:36:56 · answer #9 · answered by Butterfly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she needs effexor it,s for people that have depression, i would first get her to see a doctor for her depression, then see it,s she changes her behaviour, it may be her depession that makes her do thinking like cheat, often people cheat if they are not happy in a marrage or a serous relationship, but if she cheat after she is on the pills then i would say you need to see a expert on relationships if that still dosen,t work then you should get a divorce and deside what happens to the kids.of who is responsible to take care of the kids.
2007-01-14 16:43:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋