Here's the scoop: This girl, we see each other on a regular basis in social settings, she makes awesome eye contact with me but we never talk. She knows my family a little, I know her family a little better. In fact her parents and I have some financial dealings together and we socialize with each other everyonce in a while.
Dilemma: I'm 36 going on 37. She's maybe 17 I don't know - I haven't checked. So say 20 years. And yes, I would talk with her parents before anything whatsoever and get their permission IF I moved forward.
The Twist: I gave up chasing women a long time ago. I figure if someone is interested she'll say hi. I have no problem holding a conversation with someone I want to talk with. I'd bet money she never says hi. Barring that, I'm happy to keep on keeping on and just live my life.
I'm completely uninterested in screwing up something just to test the waters with her. What thoughts, perceptions or observations do you have?
2007-01-14 15:48:59 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Find out her age and think about whether or not you really want to get involved with someone that young?
I think for starters you should find out what her interests are and more about her before you consider this. There is a huge age difference between you two and it may also be possible that her parents may not like the idea of an older man dating their young daughter.
What happens if they do agree and you do get involved with her and if things don't work out well with her? What if things become sour with her after a few years? What will your relationship be with her parents down the road?
None of my parents friends have ever stepped over that boundary with me. I once had one of my mother's friends escort me to a function that I went to once and he was much older then me and also we didn't have all that much in common.
I liked to dance and he was not much for dancing so he sat at the table most of the time while I danced with other guys. Some of which I knew from work or from high school.
He did that as a favour to my mother mainly because my mother cared about me not getting into trouble. I was also pushed into the idea even though I didn't like it very much. I do know that my own mother at the time was just looking out for me. He was a very good friend of my mom's so I could understand that much.
I would suggest that you get to know this girl as a friend first before you would consider the idea of dating. First off you have to know if she has an interest in you and also if her parents consent to it mostly because she's under age.
2007-01-22 12:38:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most 17 yr old girls like to smile and make eye contact with men, as they're learning to be women. I think that a 20 yr age difference is too much for a 17 yr old girl. If she was 27 and you were 47, I would say go for it. I don't know how liberal her parents are, but most parents wouldn't give permission. I think all around it's not a good idea, especially with your families being close.
2007-01-14 15:56:28 · answer #2 · answered by sheila b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I totally disagree with most of the answers here. I know there is a huge age difference, but really, if you too like each other, what's the big deal? Besides, it sound great that you are asking permission of her parents. I would say that you should wait a little to see how she reacts with you, because just eye contact may be that she admires you or that she things you can be a great friend. If you don't feel like waiting, maybe you can tell her how you feel before talking to her parents.. there is no reason why you talked to them if she doesn't feel anything for you, and that may change the finantial status with her parents. So.. what I'm trying to say is that you should do either of the things I told you and always remember to be very respectful with her, because the age thing will be kind of hard if you manage to have something with her, especially on likes and dislikes...
Good luck!
2007-01-14 16:07:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
you hate rejection
you love being single
but you also know that you are not complete
somehow and perhaps this woman can make you feel complete
but you feel unsure because of the age gap
amd perhaps the uncertainty
and youre tired of the game
but then you should try what you are thinking
it might not work or might not even do you any good
but what the heck youre 37 matured enough to face problems regarding this,
go ahead if you like her
just be ready because she is 17 or 20 and there is a certainty for immaturity that you need to work out
but theres nothing wrong with trying than asking what if forever?
2007-01-14 15:54:30 · answer #4 · answered by haringmarumo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Leave it alone! Consider the age difference. You are way too old for her and she is way too young for you. Take it from me (I'm 23) she probably has limited dating experience and is likely not mature enough for you. So maybe you should give it some time and approach her when she's a little older. Since you know her parents, you'll be able to keep in touch.
2007-01-14 16:06:00 · answer #5 · answered by katnap20 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I use 1 and 3 and 5 and 6 and 8 A LOT. and 2? sort of. like, "Ok, i'm coming!" when really im just buying more time to get ready=] LOL=]
2016-03-28 22:10:59 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your in lust, not in love. With 20 years difference between the two of you, your interested in a booty call and reliving your teenage fantasies more than anything. You have nothing in common. She's young enough to be your kid. She's a fresh, young piece that you want to "hit". Get your self esteem back by being comfortable being yourself. She already has a dad. She doesn't need a boyfriend that looks like one.
2007-01-22 14:37:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's really too young for you, but if you want to talk to her you probably should say hi, duh. Girls and women still want to be pursued it's a turn on, but you don't want to be that guy who's robbing the cradle, ever read Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. Most guys want someone who they have things in common with and I doubt a 17 year old girl would have much in common with a 36 year old man. Get real and grow into your age. You should be looking for a mate not a highschool fling. Come on!
2007-01-14 15:56:10 · answer #8 · answered by dollface 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do you know that you were finishing college when she was born? Consider that at this moment, she's still younger than the age you were when she was born!
I know you're thinking that it's not a big deal, but it is. Take this from someone who's younger: young girls would rather date hot young guys rather than hot old guys (that's an oxymoron, anyway).
Girls who date guys who are that much older than them are usually looking for something else ($$$)
Find someone amazing your age that you can relate to better! I'm sure there's someone out there for you...
Good Luck :)
2007-01-14 15:55:46 · answer #9 · answered by abby j 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is 17, make sure it is legal in your state because she is a minor.
Consider that maybe she just exchanges glances with you because she thinks you're attractive, but she doesn't mean anything by it. Maybe she is too shy to say hi and wants you to make the first move.
Try talking to her and getting to know her first before you make any assumptions. Good luck! ;-)
2007-01-14 15:53:29 · answer #10 · answered by lildevilgurl152004 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋