She told me she doesn't like me and she wants to break up after 5 years 11 months and i talked her into staying. She swears were ok and were going to get married. I'm still unsure about it and when i bring it up she says i want to go home or I'm going to get off the phone. She says why would i want to talk about bad things. I said how do you feel she said the same maybe because you wont let it go. I said if you have a problem we need to fix it then she said i wasn't the one who said i have a problem you brought it up. I am afraid if i let it go it will get worse, but it could just be a phase that has nothing to do with me. Should i let her sort her problem out or should i keep trying to talk about it.
2007-01-14 14:32:06 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
u need to let it go and stop talking about the same thing over and over again...listen to what she says! she loves u and wants to marry u !
maybe ur being annoying about it!
2007-01-14 14:37:32 · answer #1 · answered by mzpurrty43 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey brah, step up, be a man and tell her that you want to take a break. Don't wait for her to decide that she wants to take some time or even dump you. Tell her that you need time to reevaluate the relationship and that her constant threatening to leave has made you less than excited about the relationship.
Now, you've been in the relationship 5 years, how many years has she been saying she's leaving? If it's a recently occuring theme, then chances are she may be planning a break up pretty soon.
Women are different then men...they remember everything. They are like wild animals, they will tear you apart with your insecurities in about 18 seconds. If she refuses to talk about problems, then how can you effectively get over them? It's not helping either of you two out. Also, women are ruthless when it comes to publicity, she will call and tell you she loves you, text you up the walls and at the same time be with her friends straight up dissing you. Also, if your sex life currently seems pretty good, watch when Harry met Sally.
Sounds to me brah like you've been worrying about this one for too long, and in your head you already know the real answer. Choose it, it's a personal decision. Pass the ball to her...Step Up, Be a Man, and tell her that you don't want anymore threatening, if she can stop give her a chance, but if she doesn't then tell her it's time to go.
You'll be fine either way. Don't settle for less.
2007-01-15 01:28:13 · answer #2 · answered by TheJman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoa you've been on this merry-go-round for almost 6 years? How low is your self-esteem that you feel you have to hold on tooth and nail to a woman who clearly does not want to make a commitment to you? Oops... that was a question... Okay, my answer is let her GO... by that I mean put an solid end to your one sided relationship. Maybe she will "sort" her problem out or maybe she will keep wallowing in her immature behavior... but don't keep putting your heart on her chopping block. She sounds like she just likes having her way with you because she knows she can control you through such manipulation. I believe they call it... She is holding you as an emotional hostage... but she can only do that if YOU ALLOW HER TOO... say Bye, Bye, Babe and pick up the pieces that remain of your life.
2007-01-14 22:39:41 · answer #3 · answered by wonderful1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop bringing it up and try to focus on the positive things, i know your worried it will get worse but if there really is a problem it will come out eventually, but if there isnt and u keep claiming there is then u might just ruin a great relationship.
2007-01-14 22:35:57 · answer #4 · answered by Onie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should let it go and hopefully let the problem get fixed by itself. I don't really understand what is all said, but don't badger her about some "problem" which I have no idea what it is. That can get quite old sometimes and will eventually probably irritate her to death. Specially if there is no problem, which it seems like there isn't.
2007-01-14 22:35:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can see you have almost 6 years invested in this relationship. But if you guys can't communicate effectively, I wouldn't take that marriage leap.
Try some counselling, after all, you've been together quite some time - couldn't have all been bad. But if you guys can't find a way to talk that works, you've got to let go.
2007-01-14 22:37:32 · answer #6 · answered by KirksWorld 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't give up. You need her to tell you what the problem is. It sounds to me like she's lieing about things being fine between you two because of the way she's acting. You need to know and if things aren't ok between you two then you and her aren't meant to be. You need to find out for sure.
2007-01-14 22:36:32 · answer #7 · answered by Irish Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's in the past, leave it there. If she has gotten past whatever you two were at odds about, why can't you? Once something is forgiven and forgotten, let it be.
2007-01-14 22:37:02 · answer #8 · answered by Deb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she cant keep running away from her problems especially if this problem keeps bugging you. keep asking her until she gives you a proper answer or until you guys fix the problem
2007-01-14 22:47:28 · answer #9 · answered by dahyahnah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go buy the book "men are from mars, women are from venus."
i just read it and it sounds like it can help you and your girlfriend alot
its by john gray, phd
2007-01-14 22:37:15 · answer #10 · answered by Thrumper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋