if you/your twins fight, is it verbal,physical,or both? When I step in to stop them, they pause long enough for me to think it's cooled then one or the other will say something,then the other.. back and forth.Both are headstrong and don't know when to shutup so it just keeps going. What to do??Any advise? No smartass answers please...I already have 2.
2007-01-14 13:13:31 · 6 answers · asked by momzilla 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm a twin and when me and my sister were in high school we would fight all the time... we almost never got along, but I think it was because we spent too much time together. We had the same friends, some of the same classes, and we were in the same clubs and sports. I don't know if your boys are together all the time, but if they are it would probably help the fighting if you got them to do things on their own.
Now that my sister and I are in seperate colleges we get along much better, because we are not together every second of the day. It is hard to be around anyone too much, even if you are twins. Just imagine having to be with someone 24/7 and then think of how good you would get along with that person after 16 years.
Also if they are together all the time they might be trying to compete against each other which causes alot of tension. Make sure that you treat them equally and that if one does something good that the other one doesn't that you praise them, but not make the other twin feel bad for not doing it. Don't compare them against each other. For instance if one boy gets straight A's on a report card and the other one gets B's and C's don't say things like see what your brother did.
Good Luck and just remember in less than 2 years they will probably be moving out!
2007-01-17 10:15:05 · answer #1 · answered by Kimberley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a piano teacher. I've had a lot of kids grow up with me taking lessons for years. I've had 7 sets of twins as students. There are 2 sets of twins in my program right now. I haven't had to parent them but I have seen them regularly. Both of the current sets of twins come in the summer to work on our farm so I see how they interact. I really believe it is natural. The verbal bickering just never stops but I've watched several of these pairs grow up and they are incredibly close. I think you can let them have at it and only step in if it is getting truly cruel or of it gets physical. My 2 oldest daughters were at each other verbally all the time, they seemed to have nothing in common (not twins, just 19 months apart). Every conversation turned into a spat. They are 37 and 35 now and they are very close. They still irritate one another once in awhile because of differing views but they lean on each other completely. Keep an eye on them yes, but let them work through it on their own.
Hope that helps.
2007-01-14 21:42:33 · answer #2 · answered by Kelley G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta hang in there a few years. They are at the worst possible age for their situation. I'm not so sure it's such a great idea for you to step in. You create a false truce. If it's physical, try calling the police one time. That might wake them up. Just right in front of them grab the phone and call the police. If you have good parental control, which few have, ground them from talking or even touching eachother for 2 days and see what happens. It's sort of like the Middle East, you have to shake things up if you really want to change it.
2007-01-14 21:34:07 · answer #3 · answered by The Scorpion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is normal for all brothers. It may be a little more so as they are twins and they both are at the same age and trying to deal with the hardships of growing up.
Good Luck
2007-01-14 21:18:21 · answer #4 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Our twins get along fantastic. They have their little fights and moments but they are best friends.
2007-01-14 22:42:58 · answer #5 · answered by Dave 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they fight verbally, but i know many other twins who get along very well, and they are very close to each other
2007-01-14 21:18:09 · answer #6 · answered by blue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋