All along I thought my boyfriend's family liked me well not until we had a heated discussion and the issue was brought about.
A week later he asked me to come over their place for lunch.. I told him that i don't want to because I feel uncomfortable being with his family. He got mad, he wanted me to do something to win over his family. I explained to him what i really felt... That I need some time too to accept his family.. I told him to understand my situation but he insisted that I come... It felt so unfair because i cause i never forced him to please my mother.. eventhough my mom doesn't want him for me...
I don't know what to do... I love him but I don't think he truly understands what i'm going through... A lot of issues has been going on between us and everytime we talk it always ends up in me just doing what he wants.. i want a break up if it's the last thing i can do to make him listen and undestand..
Please tell me what i should do....
2007-01-14 10:47:01 · 10 answers · asked by Ninja Princess 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Listen to me and to your mom. This guy is NOT for you. Remember, what you see in his parents are also IN HIM, and they will be "magnified". The old saying is quite true, "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree". There are a lot of really nice men and their families out there. Don't settle for the "rest" when you can have the "best". Take a pass on this guy, the "hurt" will only last a little while. Better then a lifetime of misery! Run don't walk. Good Luck and try and remember what I have just told you.
2007-01-14 10:53:56 · answer #1 · answered by peaches 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
firstly, he sounds like the type of guy who places his family as priority, especially when it comes to the portrayal of his GF's image to them. If so, that will place a lot of pressure on you. He 's got to understand to begin with, so talk it out with him about that point. But don't sound accusatory, ie YOU'RE always getting me to do stuff for your parents, etc. Try to get him to see what you're going through.
second, if there are a lot of communication problems, you have to start thinking, is this going to last forever? Communication is a relationship, it's got to be open, honest, two-way, and quite objective. It's really hard for a relationship to last if there's no communication.
Thirdly, wow, what age are we in? It's commendable that he's still of the kind that wants his parent's approval on his GF choices - and i have to admit it's easier on the relationship if there's no tension from the parents. but come on, it's his GF, not theirs.
2007-01-14 11:00:14 · answer #2 · answered by AW 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes people just won't understand and you need to hold your ground. If youjust keep bending to his wind, he's going to keep pushing it. Eventually, he'll think that it's not even bothering you anymore even though you voice it. You gotta stick to your guns for once and put your foot down. Let him know that you have a mind of your own and you can make your own decisions.
Also, he's gotta know that if he keeps forcing you into these situations, that your issue with his parents aren't going to mend as soon as they could be. They could even be getting worse.
2007-01-14 10:54:22 · answer #3 · answered by Rose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A relationship is about two people...two who love each other and want to please each other. It's about love and honor and trust. It takes communication and commitment from both parties to make a relationship last.
It is nice to have the parents best wishes for the two of you but it is not a fundamental part of the relationship.
I can see between the lines you are not committed to this relationship and to continue on would be disastrous for both of you.
2007-01-14 10:57:33 · answer #4 · answered by sassywv 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With a girlfriend / boyfriend comes the family.
Just try to work things out with them. The main person to work on things with the the girlfriend / boyfriend.
Good Luck
2007-01-14 10:50:58 · answer #5 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to make the extra effort if you want things to work out between the two of you...
2007-01-14 10:50:34 · answer #6 · answered by Christine =) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are letting him control you. You give in every time to please him. Think of yourself. Tell him you need his respect. Sometimes you have to demand it. Before you can receive respect you have to have respect for yourself and not let him tell you how you think or feel. If he loves you he will understand this.
Good Luck
2007-01-14 10:56:40 · answer #7 · answered by kellyfl59 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Break up if it isn't working. You already know that it has to be his way or no way. That isn't going to change. It will only get worse.
2007-01-14 10:51:19 · answer #8 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
love alone is not enough. Its about give and take. How much are you willing to give and how much are you willing to take. if he gotta go, he gotta go
2007-01-14 10:51:04 · answer #9 · answered by alexis christian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2007-01-14 10:56:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋