This guy i like, & have known for about a year, has a g/f, but he has told me straight up that he likes me a lot & is attracted to me. His g/f lives 3 hours away. i haven't done anything wrong- no kissing, no hugging, NOTHING. Since i hang out with him frequently & enjoy spending time with him, i can see that he cares for me. Anyway-- i went and saw him at his work the other day, & as i was leaving, he asked me what i was doing that night. i told him i didn't know. Later, he called me & told me that his g/f was coming in to town, but he wanted me to come & hang out if i wanted to. i told him it would be awkward, but he insisted i come. so i stopped in for about 15 mins (there was a group of people there, not just us 3). When i left, he texted me & said that he wished i would have stayed longer & that i looked absolutely beautiful. i didn't respond, & i havent answered his phone calls all weekend. his g/f is in town til tom. why did he want us both in the same place at the same time?
2007-01-14 10:34:31 · 7 answers · asked by jvcheerio 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i've known this guy for a little over a year. i've heard numerous times that he "wants his cake and eat it, too".. however, i'm not giving anything to him except my time. if he ever says anything "inappropriate", i throw it in his face that he has a g/f, and he will change the subject. i try to limit our time together, and he always complains that i don't hang out with him enough, but i tell him that when he is single, i'll hang around more. He is well aware that i will not contribute to him cheating on his g/f, but he continues to text me, call me, and ask me to hang out. i'm just so confused, and i like him so much...
2007-01-14 10:56:39 · update #1
thank you dai_nite... i HAVE thought numerous times about his g/f. i would hate to be in her shoes... however, i also would never agree to a long distance relationship. (this guy and his g/f met online). I even had a dream that she told me i was spending too much time with her boyfriend, and to back off. I am starting to feel guilty, but i am not doing anything wrong. I haven't crossed any lines. I have even tried distancing myself from him, and he continues to text me, even when she is in town. Now that i rarely answer his calls or texts, he is beggining to ask if i am mad at him. Being an 'insider', i think that he cares for us both... but still is unsure of who he wants to be with. The reason i am so attracted to him, is prob because he is one of the nicest guys i've ever met, esp compared to the other jerks i've dated. i'm tired of hearing that this guy is a jerk, because he isn't, i am just wondering what is going through his head....
2007-01-14 11:17:50 · update #2
Maybe I have the wrong take, but my first reaction is that this guy is a jerk. If he weren't a jerk he would have broken it off with the g/f as soon as he started having feelings for you, or he would have distanced himself from you if he wanted to stay with her.
He likely wanted you both in the same place at the same time because he enjoys the game and the excitement. Or maybe he was hoping for a jealous reaction out of one of you, who really knows. You might think he has genuine feelings for you, but I bet the g/f that drove 3 hours to see him probably thinks he has genuine feelings for her too! When you look at the situation from the outside, he doesn't appear to care too much about either of you.
Put yourself in the g/f shoes, and ask yourself how you would feel if you knew that your man was attracted too and hanging out with another woman while you weren't around. If you end up in a relationship with this guy you will never have trust...and without that you won't have much.
2007-01-14 11:02:16 · answer #1 · answered by dai_nite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its clear that this guy wants to have his cake and eat it too. Three hours is not that far away and i wouldnt even consider that a long distance relationship. If you let him he would be more than friends with you for sure. You said that you like him, but look at the way he talks to when he has a gf, if he does it to her, he will do the same to you. This guy sounds like a dog, and for the fact that he invited you to come over while she was there, shows that he has nerve and maybe he's trying to get an ego boost from all this. I would space yourself from him,.he seems like bad news, if he liked you soo much as he says he does, he wouldnt be with her. Remember that.
2007-01-22 10:18:10 · answer #2 · answered by jade 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he wants you around because he wants someone on the side. ANd since his gf lives 3 hrs. away. Well you his side kick which one day he will go as far as you let him. Then when you ask him to leave his gf he will come up with a lame excuse. But all his doing is using you.
2007-01-14 10:43:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is just trying to have a girl on the side when is real girlfriend is gone. If he really liked you and cared for you, he would break up with his current girlfriend and start a relationship with you.
2007-01-14 10:46:10 · answer #4 · answered by anon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's either messing with you, or he's trying to dump his g/f. Either way, he's stepping on 2 boats at once. This guy is so not worth your time. Of course, like any other girl, you are going for him anyway and in the end, he'll dump you just like he will do to his g/f and...
2007-01-14 10:44:19 · answer #5 · answered by melomane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he really wanted to see you. If he really likes you, he should have no problem breaking up with his current girlfriend. Don't get involved with him until he does that because if he's not willing to break up with her for you, then he obviously doesn't like you as much as he makes it seem
2007-01-14 10:47:42 · answer #6 · answered by gmatthews86 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he wants his cake and eat it as well --- while you may like him HE is cheating --- he is thinking more of you than his girlfriend --- i suggest you let him know that while you like him you will keep your distance --- its then up to him to choose
there is of course another possibility (depending on how old you are) he and his girlfriend are looking for a threesome
2007-01-14 10:45:37 · answer #7 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋