A man is out on the interstate having an evening drive in his sports car. He decided to open her up and the needle jumps to 120mph. Suddenly he sees a flashing red and blue light behind him. He thinks about outrunning the cops, accelerates for a few seconds, then comes to his senses and pulls over. The officer comes over to check his licence. "I've had a tough shift, says the officer. "And this is my last pull over. I don't feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before you can go!"
"Er, last week my wife ran off with a cop," says the man. "And when I saw your car I was afraid he was trying to give her back!"
"Have a nice night," says the officer. :)
2007-01-14 08:37:13 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
fingers your a bit late with this one but i still read it but will have to take you down in points 8/10
2007-01-14 09:39:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
19. True story:
An old high school friend of mine had grown up and became a commercial airline pilot. On one of his days off he rented a small plane and flew out to see his parents. While he was in town he also looked me up and we hung out for the day. The next day he told me that he had to get the plane back to the original airport, but he wanted to stay longer.
So we made a deal.
I told him that if I drove out to the originating airport (150 miles away) and picked him up that he would have to pay for the gas.
Then he up-ed the ante.
With a smug on his face he said, "I'm flying a Cessna and your driving an Audi TT,.. If you beat me to the airport I'll buy you the most expensive dinner you can get in (our small town)"
So the next day we take off. We set it up so that I leave the airport at the same time he gets into his plane (to be fair). I punch it and push 120 mph almost the entire way, slowing only for what I think could be cops. About 100 miles into the trip I get pulled over by CHP. (I spotted him earlier so I had slowed down a bit). When he asked me why I was going so fast I openly told him the whole situation - basically I was racing a plane. He smirked and said that weather the story was true or not, it was certainly the most creative excuse he's heard, and with that let me go without a ticket.
After he left me I cruised up to 75 until he turned off an off ramp and then punched it up to 120 again. Little did I know that he was on a frontage road just beside me. About 10 minutes later I saw his lights coming up on me from behind. I pulled over and he told me that he had watched me almost the entire time but it took him 10 minutes to catch up with me. Strangely enough he wasn't furious, but kind of humorously annoyed. The best part was when he said "How many times do I need to warn you about not speeding?". I simply said "Two". He then laughed and let me off, telling me that if he caught me speeding again he wouldn't bother with a ticket, but throw me in jail.
2007-01-14 16:50:16 · answer #2 · answered by blevins2147 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was stopped doing 63 in a 25. I told him I was speeding up for the 55 zone 1/4 mile ahead. He let me go. Laughing.
2007-01-14 16:53:11 · answer #3 · answered by Smurfetta 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this as been posted a couple of times this wk end but i still think its a gd 1 lmao 10/10
2007-01-14 16:40:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heard it several times, still like it though.
A man is stopped by the police and asked to blow into the bag.
He says "Why are your chips too hot."
2007-01-14 17:10:33 · answer #5 · answered by Cowboy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ha ha 10/10
2007-01-14 16:42:55 · answer #6 · answered by truckiechicken 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good one.
2007-01-14 16:44:48 · answer #7 · answered by shortnotsilly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This has been posted before , but still funny
2007-01-14 16:46:48 · answer #8 · answered by Scotty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This car is stolen would be my excuse. lol
2007-01-14 16:45:39 · answer #9 · answered by Lawnmower 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL..Good One I like It....
2007-01-14 16:50:32 · answer #10 · answered by d!☮ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋