He left to become a freshman in college right afterwards and i visited and then he started to act weird saying he just had alot going on. We often see each other and he sometimes is very angry and sometimes very nice. I love him alot and it is really ruining my life...he broke up with me on the phone and we never really talked face to face. He is also drinking alot and flirting with other womwn, but seems upset when i am with other guys...please tell me what to do.
2007-01-14 06:28:51 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My daughter-in-law was just nine when she was killed by a speeding car. The driver was "pre-occupied". Nevertheless it collapsed his world as well as mine and people react differently.
The college thing I guess, is a poor attempt to give his mind other things to think about...sort of cram it to the hilt...but it seems as though his attepts are not working.....and he needs help. He may be trying to deal with things but cant really reach a goal....
The best thing you can do is write him a long letter, not a demand or pushy one, but an understanding one. Let him realise you are there if he needs you....and then, back off. Give him some room. Hopefully he will realise he's lashing out at the ones that love him....but then he will "crack" before he comes out the other side. Be there, be prepared.
Good luck.
2007-01-14 07:25:52 · answer #1 · answered by ~☆ Petit ♥ Chou ☆~ 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well if he killed a little girl in a car accident that can scar a man for life. Changes a person you know. Its just sounds like hes going to college to do college guy stuff, drink alot, have sex with many women. He is just getting upset because when he comes home he wants some more tail while he is away from college. My advice for you. Dump him and look for a guy that will respect you and give you is attention 100%.
Ask yourself this.
Do you really need this drama in your life right now?
2007-01-14 06:34:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a sad story. He is suffering from a lot of stress and trauma. I can only imagine how bad he feels. He probably wants to crawl into a cave and hide, but since he can't reasonably do that he is trying to deal with his emotions by drinking and keeping himself distracted. Ideally, he needs to be seeing a counselor and a psychiatrist. It might be helpful for him to at least for now take an antidepressant. I know it's hard for you, but the best thing for now would be to be his friend and offer support. After what he has gone through, he is probably not ready for the intensity of a serious relationship.
2007-01-14 06:34:28 · answer #3 · answered by schweetums 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he still didn't care he wouldn't be jealous. Got a funny way of showing it though. He is dealing with GUILT feelings about the accident even though he isn't acknowledging it or admitting to it. He may not even be aware of what is actually bothering him. He may think it's behind him, and it's not. Therapy would be a good start for him. He has to want to go though, but I feel when he does he will see his issues and learn how to deal with them instead of trying to drink them away and trying not to become attached so as not to get hurt again.(Even though YOU are not the one that hurt him) He is supressing his feelings when they need to be out in the open for the healing process to begin. Be patient and try to help him if you care for him.
2007-01-14 06:37:22 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to understand that he probably does have a lot going on. This isn't something that one would easily get over. Give him his freedom to do whatever and let it go. He may get his act together and come back at which point you can evaluate him.
No one can ruin your life unless you allow yourself to feel defeated. There are other guys out there who would like to meet a nice gal. Good luck.
Jan
2007-01-14 06:40:09 · answer #5 · answered by Jan C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure he is dealing with a lot of issues. Accidentally killing someone is not an easy thing to deal with. He sounds like he is becoming self destructive and needs professional counseling. It has nothing to do with you. If you love him then help him. It might not be easy. Maybe you can talk to a counselor to find out what might be going on in his head and how you cam help him. Best wishes.
2007-01-14 06:37:59 · answer #6 · answered by margarita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I read that right, he was in a accident that killed a little girl? If that is the case, then he's going through a lot psychologically. It has to been killing him inside and maybe he doesn't know how to handle it. He should go to counseling and speak with someone about how he feels.
2007-01-14 06:34:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Were you with him when this accident happened?
Maybe you just make him think of the accident and it is to much for him to handle.
It sounds like he may need to get some counseling if he is drinking heavily and acting different.
2007-01-14 06:33:08 · answer #8 · answered by flappymcp 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
give him space and let him be single and free and continue to be his friend if thats what he wants and if you can handle that (you may not because you have feelings for him) he may have post traumatic stress and being with new people in college canhelp him forget but since you knew what happened it might make him feel guilty. i think he needs to be alone to heal so just be his friend and available if he needs to talk dont pressure for something more right now
2007-01-14 06:34:56 · answer #9 · answered by xoheidixo10 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry on your loss. once you've her username and password, you are able to only delete the account, yet i does no longer imagine that you've that. deliver a letter to the CEO explaining the problem with a replica of the death certificate. you'd be shocked what that would get you many times.
2016-10-31 02:20:21 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋