My sister has a 3 year old son and a 9 month old daughter. He is so mean to her. He literally trys to hurt her! He will head butt her, try to knock her down, pull her off the couch, pinch her, hit her. My sister can't leave them in the same room together and use the bathroom without him doing something to make her cry. She left them in the same room together, her daughter started crying, she come back in the room and her son had already sat himself in his time out chair!! He knew he had done something wrong. My sister has tried to punish him. She will stand him in the corner, give him time out, send him to his room, take away his toys. Is there anything anyone can tell me that she could try? Now she gets sick everytime she has to punish him. She has talked to him, he says he does it b/c he loves her. Why does he hurt her? Does he do it to get attention? If he is, what can she do to make him stop? She is so scared that he will really hurt her. Has anyone ever been through this?
2007-01-14 05:51:55 · 16 answers · asked by buddahbump 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
He is obviously jealous and trying to get lots of attention. If he does not get positive attention, he will try to get negative attention ....and he is succeeding. He gets punished, the baby doesn't. The next time he hurts her, your sister should ignore him and take the baby to a "safer" place. Then she should give him more positive attention, read with him, play with him and reward him every time she finds him doing nice things.......good luck! This is just a phase!
2007-01-14 06:00:57 · answer #1 · answered by conyek 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, I have a set of little cousins that do the same thing. The boy is jealous to have another kid that's getting attention and he doesn't understand that there's room in his parents hearts for two kids so he takes his anger out on his little sister. He's broken her arm and even caused her to hit her head on the coffee table, causing it to bleed and sending her to the emergency room. It is the parents job to discipline this boy before he seriously hurts her...and any parents don’t want to think about their children being a threat to each other but it can happen and maybe this boy's parents need to be reminded of it. When he acts up send him to a corner and have him stay there. Don’t talk to him or acknowledge him while he's in time-out though. You have to be firm in discipline though cause kids aren't stupid, they know when time out doesn't mean anything or if they have parents that are push-over’s. (Not to say they are) Also, you said that your sister has tried talking to him...he's a 3 year old boy, he doesn't understand that he could really hurt her, and to hear that he's doing it because he loves her is far from the truth. It's just another way of "working" his parents, he thinks he's being smart and will get out of punishment for it. Most don't believe in spanking their kids anymore, but really, in this case, it might be necessary. I'm not talking about REALLY getting crazy or anything but sometimes a kid just needs it to understand what they're doing is wrong. If your sister cant leave the room without something happening then have her take him with her as part of the punishment. If she's doing house-work, making dinner, etc. have the boy follow her around the house. Remember that whatever the parents do, they need to be consistent. When he acts up they need to call him on it every time and there must be consequences.
2007-01-14 06:13:48 · answer #2 · answered by Heather 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well the mother doesn’t sound like she’s helping much, is she? Simply excusing their behavior is not the way to go. She needs to sit down with her children and explain to them that they WILL do whatever you ask them to do because you are HER husband. Period. This way they know that mommy doesn’t approve of their behavior (#1) and that she and you are a unified front (#2). You guys MUST be unified in discipline or else the tactics will not work. It would be too one-sided. If their daddy is in their life and he is a cooperative gent, he should be told to tell them the same thing. When they are at you all’s house, they need to listen to you. Think of some punishment for them if they do not listen to you. For a while it will be for their mother to discipline them if they don’t’ do what you ask. Then after they get comfortable in their new roles you should be able to discipline them within reason. If you guys spank I would suggest leaving the spanking to her forever. Time outs, when implemented correctly, can work just as well. Y’all need to watch a few episodes of the Nanny, lol, as well. OR you could sign up for her to come to your house. I’d come instead but I’m pregnant and already have a job lol.
2016-05-24 00:48:20 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son is 3 and daughter is about to be 11months. My son jsut wants to play with her but can't yet cause she's too little.
Once I put my daughter on the floor for tummy time while my son was watching a video and went in to the kitchen for something and when I came back into the living room sy son had picked her up and was trying to hold (carry) her and when he saw me he droped he and ran away cause he knew he wasn't sopoosed to do that. Even know that she can crawl adn is starting to walk all he wants is to be able to play with her but he can't, but it is getting better as she is getting older.
Maybe your nefew just want's to play with his sister. Try to incled him in doing this for his sister, like my son get;s her a diaper when asked. and gets her some toys to play with.
I hope this helps.
Best of luck!
2007-01-14 06:40:40 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like your sister has tried almost everything.
Has she tried giving the son little tasks to do in connection with taking care of his sister? When he helps with feeding her, dressing her, playing with her etc., he should have lots and lots of praise. Give him the impression that when he is being good, he is a big boy and a wonderful big brother.
If this doesn't work, maybe your sister should consider getting professionel help in dealing with the little boy - preferably before he actually hurts his sister.
Good luck!
2007-01-14 06:00:44 · answer #5 · answered by Great Dane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
AFTER GIVING BIRTH MOTHERS ARE USUALLY SO BUSY WITH THERE NEW KIDS WILL FEEDING,BATHING THEM AND ALL THAT STUFF THAT THY USUALLY DON'T HAVE TIME TO PLAY WITH THERE OLDER KIDS AND THEY FEEL LEFT OUT SO THEY TAKE THERE JEALOUSY AND SADNESS INTO ANGER AND TAKES IT OUT ON THERE NEW SIBLINGS.YOU SHOULD TELL HER TO PLAY WITH THE 3 YEAR OLD MORE WHEN THE 9 MONTH BABY IS NAPPING OR WHEN SOMEONE ELSE IS HOLDING HER IT MIGHT NOT SEEM MUCH BUT IT REALLY HELPS U CAN BE SAVING HER FROM HAVING TO WORRY THAT HER KID WILL TAKE THERE ANGER OUT ON OTHER PEOPLE WORSE WHEN HE GET OLDER
2007-01-14 06:02:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my 4 yr old is being ugly, he is asking for my attention. Try spending some quality time with him doing what *he* wants to do, even if you don't like it (ie playing legos, toy soldiers, cars, etc). He is begging for attention or is board.
2007-01-14 05:58:57 · answer #7 · answered by Sherral 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its just because that the the 3 year old son thinks that shes like an enemy cause shes a girl or hes just jealous of her... just keep them away from eachother until the little boy grows up.
2007-01-14 05:55:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is definitely looking for attention from you sister. try having your sister have her son help with the baby. for example asking him to feed his sister. involving him with activities with the baby will may satisfy the attention he needs and start to grow to love his baby sister.
2007-01-14 06:34:31 · answer #9 · answered by bluebearstuff 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is jellous of his sister.He needs his butt spanked good. Your sister probly pays more attention to her she has to divide her time between them as much as posible
2007-01-14 05:56:34 · answer #10 · answered by railway 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋