I confesed my feelings for a girl after we met for 2 weeks and she felt the same too. We had finals coming up and did not have time to go on dates, however we were intimate when we had the chance and I felt that she was being true and we really did click.
I decided to take her on a date (which she wanted) one day after a 3 days absence when she was not being herself.
After the first date, she suddenly just said "lets just be friends". I told her to take time to think about it since her reasons were about insecurity. We hanged out more after finals, but she still felt confused about us and was not open.
I suggested later to be friends since I felt things shouldnt be confusing. However she wanted me to know that all her life and she ever had was commited relationships and that she really did liked me and not to think she was playing me. That I would be treated better as a friend.
Now we talk on AIM but I feel like we are not as open as we were and talk less, What went wrong??
2007-01-14 02:38:54 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I plan to actually ask her what went wrong.. Do you think its a good idea? How you think I should approach this.
2007-01-14 02:40:11 · update #1
I think that's a great idea to ask her!
You deserve an answer, because you laid your feelings out on the line so why should she have the right just to say suddenly "lets be friends"
Denfinetly do it in person, with just you too, none of your buddies, none of hers. Over the phone or AIM is way to impersonal.
Be straight forward with her, don't beat around the bush.
Once you've asked her why, allow her to explain herself, don't interrupt, it's rude and it could end in a screaming match.
Be fair, but also make sure you're getting a good answer, "because" is an excuse.
Good luck!
2007-01-14 02:43:56 · answer #1 · answered by Kipper to the CUP! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel and it's really a confusing situation and we cannot always control the situation. The best thing that you could do is ask her but obviously she will not say anything and the only thing that she will say is let's be friends. I could say, she had a bad experience already with past relationships and she wanted the real thing which it cannot always be like that. One thing I remember a phrase in a movie I watched the "Wedding Planner" J-Lo was the actress, anyway, the father of J-Lo quoted, first you have to build the friendship, then respect and it will grow to love. That is so true you have to build that kind of friendship between the both you and friendship is the strongest thing that nobody could ever destroy it. So, try to build the friendship first with her, nothing went wrong maybe she was just scarred or something. Well, goodluck............
2007-01-14 10:59:35 · answer #2 · answered by Teacher Meg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably had a bad relationship in the past and is insecure about moving on cause she might get hurt again. I know I was. It took me a while to trust guys again. I also realized though that to findthe right someone you have to take chances. Thats life. I did that and now I am with a wonderful man who treats me better hten I ever had. Have an open honest conversation with her. Tell her you know she is scared but she needs to take a chance with life. Either it is with you or another guy. Tell her how you feel about her and tell her that you will give her a little time to think what she would like to do. But dont wait around forever for her.
Good luck.
2007-01-14 10:48:19 · answer #3 · answered by moo shell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. It sounds like she has trouble comitting, and she had a change of heart and would rather have you as a friend with *benefits* then committ to a relationship. She's not ready to enter in to a relationship, that's all. You have to decide if being her friend is truly enough for you, and give her the space to figure things out.
2007-01-14 10:46:33 · answer #4 · answered by restless_nymph 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way to know is to just ask her about it. Maybe she's confused on the way she feels about you, or maybe it's something in her past. Ask her how she feels about your relationship, and try not to pressure her.
2007-01-14 10:48:25 · answer #5 · answered by Addikt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would leave it alone. She said what she said, thats it. Leave her alone and move on. Don't get caught up in a emotional trip! Next you will be a stalker or some desperate guy who wont give up. Keep your dignity.......
2007-01-14 10:46:37 · answer #6 · answered by sirjames 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe shes scared of a relationship.. ask her why does she just want to be friends and tell her how u feel.
good luck*
-Mrs. Vaughan.
2007-01-14 10:44:44 · answer #7 · answered by Niela-Tequila 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you cant take a hint. She is trying not to hurt your feelings. She is not interested in you. Ouch
2007-01-14 10:44:37 · answer #8 · answered by Fergy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will never get the real answer unless you ask her directly.
2007-01-14 10:48:15 · answer #9 · answered by lonelygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just sit her down and explain how u feel
2007-01-14 10:42:48 · answer #10 · answered by carebear_destroyer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋