Serious question. How do you deal with someone who has their child do everything your child does?

Question

My wife and I have two children. The younger one is a boy of 7. It seems as though everytime we get him involved in something or get him something my sister has to do the same thing for my nephew who is 6. We got our children into martial arts, she did. We bought our son a gameboy, she did. We got our son a dirtbike, she did. This last one after chastising me on the dangers, etc. of a kid riding, and saying she wouldn't let hers. Two weeks later she "changed her mind" and had me looking for one for my nephew. We decided to do our son's room in moto-x theme now our nephew is going to have his done that way. There is more but I only have so much space. My wife and I understand that it isn't our nephews fault. To make matters worse they moved right around the corner from us so we can't even get away from them. Generally. I ain't shy about letting people know when they are ticking me off but, She IS my sister and she lost a child about 8 years back. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

My sister does the same to me, everything I want to do or buy as soon as I mention it she goes out and gets it, I feel like she is always trying to be better than me, I always considered us equal but she really pisses me off with it. I said a few months back that I was going to do a course in digital photography so her and her husband decided that is what they wanted to do, I said I wouldn't mund doing protraits and so they go and buy a camera 10x as good as mine, everything I do they have to go bigger and better, don't get caught up in the competition, don't talk to your sister abotu the things you are doing for your son or the things you are buyiong for you son. Get a headswell, ur sis is jealous of you. Just try to spend a little less time with her, and maybe suggest that the two kids don't always have to have everything the same, let them be individuals, I don't have much advcice other than that because I am afraid my sis and I will start a major fued if I say anything to her, so I get by with whinging an complaining to my mum and when she starts to brag I just change the subject or walk away.

Answer 2

They are cousins and only 1 year apart in age. Trust me, it sounds like they are just trying to give their son the things he sees his friends have. The things you mentioned are basic kids things that they all want about that age. Me and my cousins had rooms that looked alike because I thought his room was so cool that I wanted mine done the same way. When I went to visit him and he had a cool new toy or game, I'd go home and want the same thing. They're kids...it's normal .It was all very innocent. I think you are making way too much of this. Be happy that your sister is a good Mom and can do these things for her son. Stop being competitve. You should be happy for your nephew. If she starts buying the same furniture as you or wearing the same clothes, etc.....then I'd feel funny about it. For now, relax.

Answer 3

Tell her you and your wife are saving back money for your son's college education and when that time comes, you and your wife have no problem in letting him decide what college he wants to attend. If your sister was smart, she would do the same thing for her son.

Answer 4

are you competing with each other with your kids or something? They are cousins, they probably would wanna do everything together. Family is important. When I was small, most of my friends were my cousins or related to me somehow. And guess what, they STILL are my friends, they're the best kind. And I loved living close to my aunites and uncles and other family growing up. Do you not like your family and want your kids to not like theirs either???? dang

Answer 5

I can't see what's bothering you. She obviously admires you very much. Relax and enjoy the adulation.