Why is my girlfriend so clingy & controlling?

Question

I have been dating my girlfriend for about a year now and she is so clingy, she is suffocating me !

Here are just a few of the things she does:
-She calls me every hour (I am serious)
-She says I love you every 5 minutes
-She checks my phone calls and e-mails
-She always wants to know where I am
-She always wants to go everywhere with me
-She keeps saying I am cheating on her and I have never cheated on her or any of my past girlfriends

She is really bugging me, but I don't want to break up with her, so how can I get her to stop being so clingy and controlling ?!

Thanks for your help :)

She is really sweet, but very controlling and clingy :(

Answer 1

Tell her you're busy. Cancel your cell phone/don't check your email/filter her email as spam. She should not be calling you that often - it's her low self-esteem or lack of things to do that does that. It's not healthy for neither her nor you.

Answer 2

from my experience, girls like that seem to have real problems with self-esteem (among other things) And from what you say it doesn't seem like she has any trust in you.I don't know how you feel about that, but that would be a big problem with me. And though you may not want to break up with her. From what you say she seems extremely controlling. I don't know how you put up with it for a year.

Strangely enough I personally just ended a relationship with a girl who was controlling/clingy like that a few months ago. I didn't want to break-up with her either . But her annoying/immature behavior forced me to make that decision. I felt bad at first of course, but I was so glad I finally had room to breathe again and had time to do things I wanted to do.

Now I don't think there is any quick-fix for people like that. But the best advice I can give you is to TELL HER. If she can't handle an adult converstation. She obviously has more issues to work out. You may not want to, but breaking up with her may be the only way you'll get any space. It may not seem it but there are better, more grown-up women out there.

Answer 3

Be honest with her. Tell her that she's pushing you away by trying to be so close. Explain that you need a little space, and that you'd appreciate it if she'd trust you enough to not check your phone and e-mail. I'm assuming that you don't check her phone and whatnot. As long as that's the case, just ask her, "Honey, would you like it if I always checked your phone/e-mail?" She'll more than likely get the point and understand.

Answer 4

well baby she is just being tooo possessive about u....sheez keepin a check on u....may b coz the way she loves u , she must hve loved some1 the same way in her past ....and tht person wud hve cheated on her....
give her space
give her ur everything
make her feeeeeeeeeeeeeeel secure and special
and tok to her abt this
may b u get smtg u really wanted!!
coz u hve been datin her past a yr now and u hve the rite to knw everythin then may it b sometg abnormal abt ur chic....
this problem is very rare ....so the solutions do difeer
she says u cheat her!!! say u cnt cheat her coz one cnt cheat iz own soul....
u got wht i mean
make her feeel tht she is flying in the sky of ur love...
make her feeel superior than ol the other
whtever happens...plse b calm and never leave her...coz if wht u wrote is actaully the truth then she reallly loves u and will go into deep depression if u leave her...
i am soooooooo dead sure tht is wud actaully help the best!!
take care....!

Answer 5

You can't---I repeat, you can't---hear me??? You can't!!! you need to get away from that person. It is overbearing and will only get worse. She may have a mental problem but before she gets a rage and knifes you--get out and go.Men are like this too---and they are just as bad---why would you want to stay---are you sick too?? There isn't a chest or a love technique worth tolerating what you described---you know it won't last so don't be stupid. If you stay, don't say I didn't warn you. Aren't there any other women in your town??

Answer 6

My God. I've heard of clingy girls before, but this one takes the prize. What you need to do is gradually train her to adapt to your absence. Spend more time with your friends, or just with yourself, with your ringer off. If this doesn't help matters after a month or two, you'll have to ask whether you prefer your girl or your freedom.

Answer 7

She obviously loves you very much and is begging you to tell her that you love her also. That is all. It is obvious you have not made your feelings for her clear. When you have a good thing learn to appreciate and reciprocate, or once it leaves it will never come back again. Be logical.

Answer 8

i don't know could be a serious head injury
mine like it to she gets well pissed of if i don't call or text all the time to the point of she call me at work which could get me the sack if i caught shes always doing it wont go out without me but wont stay in if im out whatever you do do it suttle because mine hold has a right go if i tell her shes controlling

Answer 9

she has a lot of work to do with her selfesteem.She probably has none!!!!!!
Control allways shows insecurity in every aspect.
I once said tht (u are cheating on me)for a person to whom I showed my interest really open.He later asked for my number as he did a favour to me.In 2 weeks he made 3 unanswered calls,sent 2 messages answering to mine and took me out once.I just said at the end,tht buddy u are really indifferent and "in which row of your love-dates have u put me?".But u have no relation with him..So I estimate it's clearly her insecurity.

Answer 10

tell her to stop it in a nice way so she wont hate u tell her that ur not doing anything wrong and that you really like her so u wouldnt do anything stupid to hurt her tell her that she is suffocatting u tell her that you need some space to relax and some how lock your emails and phone and if she doesnt stop going every where with you start going to places that she wont like