How do you know if your grade 2 child is really picked on at school, or if they are too senstive?

Question

She does tend to be senstive.. but I am going to talk to her teacher as she gets very upset very often about how she is treated at school, especially on the playground

Answer 1

Definitly talk to the teacher and tell her to watch the child on the playground to see what is going on. Even better take a day off or afternoon and show up at the school during recess to observe for yourself. Tell the teacher and school you plan on doing that so they can let you know what time recess is. It's your right as a tax payer to observe the school and see what is going on there.

Answer 2

Bullies abound in school.

Go to the school every now and then during recess or breaks to see how the children interact.

Keep on talking with the schoolyard monitor person, who will usually be either a volunteer parent or someone hired by the school to supervise the playground while looking for your child. Act very nonchalantly, not excited at all

See how your daughter behaves when she sees that you are there.If she runs to you with a desperate look that says "thank god you're here" and hugs you with all her might and not letting go, then there is a problem.

She may simply act pleased. Then you can tell that she has everything under control or the situation is manageable.

Explain that you just dropped by to see if you can be a parent volunteer for school breaks. If the news spreads around, the bullies will probably leave her alone, even if you do not follow through with volunteering.

Answer 3

There's nothing wrong with sensitive. My daughter is sensitive. When she thinks she's picked on, I talk to the teachers not only about wether or not she's picked on, but how is she doing with the other kids... Is she interacting, is she standing back... How's she doing socially? Teachers are pretty good at gauging that.

One year my daughter thought she was being picked on, and the teacher told me that she was really just being a little too insistent when it came to being right (ok, she was being a know it all).

So, when she says she's picked on, and the teacher says she isn't, I just ask her "So, what do you think is going wrong, and how can we fix it?" We discuss strategies for how she can better handle the minor mishaps of school life.

It helps. She's had almost no problems at school this year, and she's got lot's of friends to back her up when they do happen(Finally!!!).

Don't worry, and above all, if your kid feels picked on, don't act like you don't believe it... it only adds to the stress.

Answer 4

"One of the hardest moments for a parent is when kids come home and say, 'Mom (or Dad), they're teasing me.' It's important to remember that every child will be teased—and do some teasing—at some point at school. This level of teasing can be seen as a social experiment; kids are experimenting with power, aggression, friendship, etc. In fact, some teasing is a way that children attempt to express love and affection for one another—since it can be 'uncool' to express these emotions directly. If we respond with empathy, and also with a perspective that it isn't the end of the world, then children can find their inner resiliency inside and cope with a moderate amount of teasing. However, if a child is always the target—or frequently the perpetrator, then it's time for more intervention, such as talking with teachers and guidance counselors or seeking professional help."

Lawrence Cohen, Ph.D.
Co-Author, Mom They're Teasing Me

Another way to help your child, get involve in your daughter/son school by attending PTA meeting and getting involve in his/her classroom. It's important to have a connection with your child.
I understand many of us work full time, and leaves us little room for our children to help in their class, but we have to try a little harder to be involve in any possible way.

Answer 5

You should read The Bully, The Bullies and The By Stander by Barbara Colloroso, she talks all about this stuff.
If your child thinks she's being bullied she is being bullied.
Your best bet is to start off by talking to her teacher. They can keep an eye on things.

Answer 6

Yes she may be very sensitive, but she is also being picked on. Other children often single out sensitive children ans torment them more than others because they know from experience they will get the reaction they want from her.

Answer 7

If she thinks she's being picked on, then she IS being picked on. It's good that you're going to talk to her teacher. I hope they take it seriously. I was picked on 3rd - 9th grade (it only stopped when we moved) and it still hurts to think about it today.

Answer 8

believe your child and they will learn to believe in themselves