We're pretty good friends at work and sometimes I think he has feelings for me too but I'm not that attractive so I doubt that's it. He's probably one of those overly friendly people. I feel guilty about my feelings even if he doesn't return them and I'm just a mess all day long. I want - need - to stop feeling this way. I'm already looking for another job but there must be something I can do in the meantime to handle being around him. On the one hand it feels natural and makes me happy to be around him but on the other hand - the hand that slaps me in the face every time I see his ring - it's so painful. It also hurts because for all I know he realizes my feelings and pities me. It's not like I can ask him..."I'm in love with you. Even though you're married is there a chance you have feelings for me or do you just feel sorry for me because I'm in love with you"? Yeah, right. I could just see the horror in his eyes.
2007-01-13 15:00:18 · 9 answers · asked by Trainwreck 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dear Trainwreck, your probably right he is more than likely just being cordial because after all, you are co-workers. You need to really be very careful about this situation. One reason is because if you are looking for another job you are going to need a recommendation (good one) from this one. So watch yourself and conduct yourself on a professional level. He is forbidden fruit, he is married. So your on the right track looking for a new job. That way you will have new scenery and be away from that situation. But learn from this, and don't let it happen at your next job. If it does with another married man, well then you know you need to seek professional help. A pattern is forming. So try to focus your attention on your new job, new surroundings and new life away from this co-worker. Good Luck. You never know you just may find your special someone at this next job. And I don't mean a special (married) someone.
2007-01-13 15:12:26 · answer #1 · answered by ncamedtech 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a feeling you'll do what's right for you...... you are already taking steps in that direction in looking for a new job. The bottom line is that he's married - even if you did go ahead and tell him your feelings and if he felt the same way ..... what next? Would you be willing to be the "other" woman and then wonder and wonder if he'll leave his wife for you? Would you really want him to do that?
From the few lines you've written, you come across as warm and caring. Don't you think you deserve someone who'll be able to give you 100%? All the best to you.
2007-01-14 00:30:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's bad enough being with someone that's single and he cheats less known falling for a married man that's gonna have pity time for you. Just try to speak to him and go on and remember that he's married and how it would be a hot mess for you to fall for someone who's going home to their wife every night.
2007-01-14 02:13:33 · answer #3 · answered by 2sweet4u 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well these is one of two things you can do- look at what he does that is non attractive and think how he looks when he is on the toilet doing a NR2. Or you can just confess how you feel and get it over with.
2007-01-14 00:06:33 · answer #4 · answered by nleitch 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try honesty, that always works for me.
Or you could pin him up against the wall and lay one on him
2007-01-13 23:07:38 · answer #5 · answered by Keyser S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know now that you have feelings for me. See you in the photo copying room after 5.
2007-01-14 00:52:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
LEAVE HIM ALONE. What right do you have anyway. He has a wife and probably childred. Split em up and be a B***H. And that was putting it mildly.
2007-01-14 03:16:00 · answer #7 · answered by Honey 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well just keep talking to him, make funny jokes, flirt alittle and see what happens.
2007-01-13 23:08:26 · answer #8 · answered by susieq j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you`re scaring me mrs
2007-01-13 23:08:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋