Will try to make a long story short here. My father recently died, I'm 19 and going to college, but during breaks I am living at home. My mother and I are not getting along, and I have done basically everything in my power to try and work things out with her, but whenever I try to discuss an issue with her she tells me I'm irrational, or that it was in the past and doesn't matter anymore, or she doesn't remember what I'm trying to talk about, and tells me it never happened. She went through a period where she told me everything was my fault, and she's been horrible to my friends, too. I suggested family counseling, she was against it but finally agreed but then when I gave her info on it she never bothered to pursue it, I'd need her insurance info to set things up. It'd really mess her up if I left, but I am always very depressed when I'm at her house, and we're always fighting so I'm wondering if it might not be best, but am not sure what to do. Is leaving wrong?
2007-01-13 14:58:00 · 7 answers · asked by wonderer152 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your dad recently died. No wonder she is having major issues. Your mom really needs you right now but moving out might help the problems. She might realize she needs to treat you better once she sees your gone. Move out but stay in close contact with her and do not start arguments with her. Just go to visit her a couple times a week or once a day to make sure she isnt isolated in her grief completely. Broach the counceling again later when she feels a bit stronger or more hopeless and willing to go. You should be free to move out for your own health and it may better the situation I just suggest keeping in close contact with her.
2007-01-13 15:05:49 · answer #1 · answered by jennyve25 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through something similar with my mother, she always wanted to be right and never wanted to hear the truth, i left the house for a couple months and i went to live with my brother. All the time away it helped her realized a lot and change her attitude......I would suggest you give it a try and find another place to stay for a while, let her clear her head and see how she will react to it. Sometimes is good to get away. I don't believe leaving for a short period of time is wrong, just don't forget about her....................good luck
2007-01-13 15:06:03 · answer #2 · answered by J . B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, leaving is not wrong. I was in the same situation as you and I moved out. Things did not get better between my mom and I, but at least now I do not have to live with it 24/7.
2007-01-13 15:24:50 · answer #3 · answered by snowangel_az 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you leave. She is probably taking you for granted right now...if you're gone, then there is no one she can blame but herself. After a few weeks, visit her and let her know you care, just you want to be treated with more respect. After all, you are her daughter.
2007-01-13 15:15:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to leave. Her problems are not yours and you deserve a happy life. You sound like a very mature and responsible person and you need to take her weight off your shoulders.
2007-01-13 15:13:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wouldn't be wrong, but definitely try to improve your relationship with your mother once you're out. Visit her often, show her you still care about her and about your relationship with her.
2007-01-13 15:03:30 · answer #6 · answered by Jess H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move out as fast as you can. Your mom sounds mentally ill and if she isn't willing to help herself you can't be responsible even if she says you are. Go to therapy by yourself.
2007-01-13 15:02:40 · answer #7 · answered by Sterling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋