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sounds like both of you should learn more about swinging from some real swingers to find out if it is something you both want to do. check http://www.lifestylelounge.com/login.asp?referredby=NUDIST4U to chat with some real swingers and see what its all about

2007-01-14 10:03:46 · answer #1 · answered by Nudist4u 2 · 1 0

The most important part of swinging is the ability to communicate honestly and openly with each other.

Before you wade into the Lifestyle you need to both be honest and open with each other about why you want to do it and what you both expect to get out of it.

Swinging is something done by couples FOR the benefit of the couple. Therefore it has to be something both of you want to do, and something that brings good benefits to both of you.

Now, for some responses to the know-it-alls above:

"You should not swing any way because your saying she doesnt have what you need work what ever it is a diffrent way."

A common misconception about swinging is that people do it because something is lacking in their relationship or sex. Not true at all. People do it to explore their sexuality and fantasies together. It is additional sex, not replacement sex.

"eww, that is disgusting. shame on you."

For you, swinging may be. That is your opinion, not fact for everyone. Don't assume that your way of living is right for everyone. Don't judge others just because it is not "right" for you.

"I've noticed a lot of people "just say this". I've done a lot of research into swinging and usually if you go to a party....you're separated...and you don't know what SHE'S doing and she doesn't know what YOU'RE doing and there is a lot of jealousy that goes on...ya know what?"

This may be the case for what has happened to her, but for the majority of swingers it is nothing like that. This is a classic case of someone not understanding what is is all about doing it wrong.

"ok - this doesn't ever work out. Ever. you already know she certainly isn't "ready" for this! Please don't push her into this; it will have a terrible impact on her self image. if you "NEED" more than one woman; Why are you even in a relationship?"

How do you know this never works out? What is your experience? Have you been a successful swinger in the Lifestyle for many years and so happily married you can't imagine life without your spouse?

I'd guess not.

Secondly, a terrible impact on her self image? If she is all for it, that I will tell you from experience, it is women who benefit the most from boosts to self-image in swinging because they discover that they are desirable and it is okay to be a sexual being.

If we do this why are we even in a relationship? Because it is something we enjoy doing as a couple for us, as a couple. Again, a comment from someone that has never experienced it.

"It would be the biggest mistake any couple could make.... If having sex with strangers is so important to you ..... break up and go have fun. because you'll end up broken up anyway. But to include someone else in your warped idea of fantasy fullfillment is just so sad. Not to mention, the fastest track to HIV."

Again, this is purely your opinion, and I've found those with the most opinions usually have the least amount of facts.

Fact: the divorce rate amongst swingers is less than 1/3 of the general societal average.

Fact: In a 2000 study of swingers done by Bellarmine University, when asked the question "Among all things in life, how important is being married?" 86% of swingers responded "very", "most" or "somewhat" important compared to 72% in the General Social Survey done by the University of Michigan. So clearly, swingers value marriage more than average America.

Fact: Safe sex is practiced far more widely amongst swingers than it is among non-swingers, such as singles or cheating married people. Swingers are generally more conscientious about practicing safe sex since that is the exact reason they are there and it's not just something that happens like "hooking-up" with someone at the bar.

For some great, objective information about swinging, it's pro's, con's, and issues, check-out The Swingers Board.

2007-01-14 16:26:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I've noticed a lot of people "just say this". I've done a lot of research into swinging and usually if you go to a party....you're separated...and you don't know what SHE'S doing and she doesn't know what YOU'RE doing and there is a lot of jealousy that goes on...ya know what? I suggest talking about it...getting turned on together and forgetting it. If you want to stay together that is...and it sounds like you do.

2007-01-13 19:46:20 · answer #3 · answered by DoubleD 1 · 0 1

It would be the biggest mistake any couple could make.... If having sex with strangers is so important to you ..... break up and go have fun. because you'll end up broken up anyway. But to include someone else in your warped idea of fantasy fullfillment is just so sad. Not to mention, the fastest track to HIV

2007-01-13 19:49:40 · answer #4 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0 2

You should not swing any way because your saying she doesnt have what you need work what ever it is a diffrent way.

2007-01-13 19:39:49 · answer #5 · answered by Cynthia C 1 · 0 1

If you think she is just saying it, she probably is! She will let you know if she's really into it and trust me...you will know!

2007-01-13 19:40:06 · answer #6 · answered by sweetgrl 1 · 1 0

Hey why not dance through a mine find?

2007-01-13 19:41:44 · answer #7 · answered by Bo V 4 · 0 1

ok - this doesn't ever work out. Ever. you already know she certainly isn't "ready" for this! Please don't push her into this; it will have a terrible impact on her self image. if you "NEED" more than one woman; Why are you even in a relationship? Quit being a player!! Get honest!

2007-01-13 19:46:34 · answer #8 · answered by ~ kelby67 ~ 1 · 0 3

hit man. what u got to lose. put the moves on her and hit it like a cave man

2007-01-13 19:40:10 · answer #9 · answered by PhatCat 2 · 0 2

Go for it! It's my favorite type of dancing.

2007-01-13 19:39:57 · answer #10 · answered by Steve S 1 · 1 1

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