I went to a basketball game last night, but I lied to my boyfriend because I know he would get very mad. He always thinks I'm going to cheat on him! He was working and it was going to be a really good game. I went with the girl friends only. I didn't tell him I went so that I could tell him later that night so he'd understand. I don't tell him because when I do he does things like go to parties, drink, and whatever. Isn't that worse than a basketball game? I don't know how to handle it. He called this morning calling me a liar and a cheater... It hurts. He said I deserve to hurt, it's karma and more revenge is coming. What am I supposed to do? It's been 14 months together.
2007-01-13 05:27:37 · 12 answers · asked by Cieeeee <3 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you shouldn't have lied to him, that's why he thinks your cheating.
2007-01-13 05:31:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like your boyfriend is very insecure and what an insecure person needs is security. Lying to him doesnt help the situation u should always be truthful regardless of the situation cause then he will see that u will always tell him the truth no matter how it makes him feel. Thats a way to build up trust with him if u want him to trust u don't lie. U obviously had nothing to hide anyway...u went to the game with girls, u sound like u don't want to cheat on him anyway so like i said be honest with him and let him know how it makes u feel to be accused of something your not doing and that u wont stand for that, regarless of how much u care about him...stand strong with that decision and he will see u tell him the truth and u dont like to be called a liar and he cant do anything but lay off and respect that otherwise u guys dont need to be together
2007-01-13 13:48:20 · answer #2 · answered by JAY 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've seen and heard this so many time before. It's a case of what's good for the goose is not good for the gander. He loves you so much he doesn't want to let you come close to meeting another guy that might steal you away from him. It's jealousy at it worst. A little jealousy is a compliment but it can be taken way too far. I've been like this a lot in my life and from my experience I can't seem to shake it. You can be sure he loves you a lot but you're going to have to sit down with him and explain that if he can go out then so can you. If you are both really in love with each other, you'll be able to work it out but it's going to take some work on both your parts.
The basis for any good relationship is trust and trust comes with talking things over with each other.
Good luck and I hope it all works out for you.
2007-01-13 13:51:29 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That sound like a crappy relationship. You should be able to do what you want whenever you want to. And not have to worry about retaliation and revenge. I say leave the guy and find someone more mature and ready for a relationship. Your dude sound like an a$$hole.
2007-01-13 13:34:02 · answer #4 · answered by voidone76108 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK you had to lie to him I understand that. He may be accusing you of cheating because he is insecure. Or Maybe he is cheating himself so he figures if he does it you probably would do it too. Your not in a healthy relationship. Sorry to break the bad news but he has a lot of learning to do.
2007-01-13 13:35:26 · answer #5 · answered by CamaroBoy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why wouldn't you both go to the game together? Do things together. You both need to sit down and makes plans to go out because this is going to only head for disaster in your relationship.
2007-01-13 13:32:07 · answer #6 · answered by pro2call10 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you with him?
Jealousy is a sure sign of a controlling personality and control can lead to abuse. He is already controlling you because you have to lie to him just to hang with your friends just so he won't get mad and hurt your feelings. Things are NOT going to get better with him!
It's time to leave his insecure butt and give him time to think about his behavior towards you and to give yourself time to think about why you would settle for someone who will treat you this way.
You deserve much better, dear. Please love yourself more than this!
2007-01-13 13:36:19 · answer #7 · answered by thezaylady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if hes that insecure.... dont you think there something wrong with him.. drop him and stop worrying about it.. that way he can know what hes missing... if a boyfriend doesnt let you go to a basketball game, there is serious issues you two need to work out.
2007-01-13 13:42:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldnt have to lie to him, that is no way to gain trust. I think you have to set some rules in the relationship, or start looking for another guy who is a little more mature and secure.
2007-01-13 13:31:47 · answer #9 · answered by rand a 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've been putting up with that bullshit for 14 months? It's your own damn fault for sticking around. You should've kicked him to the curb a long time ago.
2007-01-13 13:32:22 · answer #10 · answered by white.devil 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell him the truth. besides, if he dos't want to trust you, he probably dosn't love you. just be honest and flat out. try to avoid a shouting match by being VERY nice to him. im sure things'll work out.
2007-01-13 13:34:50 · answer #11 · answered by DeanB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋