I am 22 years old and never had a relationship and have rarely dated. One thing I have realized over the years that guys are rarely attracted to me because of my severe acne, even though who find me attractive, have only seen me in make up that covers my scars or acne (I have severe acne and scars). This has really made me loose confidence in myself and made me sad as they judge me based on how I look. I would really like some advice on what should I really do, should I hide my face behind on heavy make every time, as I fear what their reaction would be if the see my face or should I not care on how I look? I really need to know if I should be with a guy who should really care on how I look or it normal to be judged that way. This problem has made very insecure and rather than being secured, I am always worried on what anyone would think about me, which should not be normal for a 22 year old!! I need an advice on what should I do, to not to be judged based on my look?
2007-01-13 04:59:06 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Human nature..
Human psyche..
Life is not fair...
2007-01-13 05:01:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 2⤋
How you look is the first thing one will see / encounter before he can get to know anything else about you. It is simply the visual input that makes the first impression. Some people are not smart enough to realize that if they look beyond the looks they see the real person. It is a shame. But it is also a blessing. When you find the right person who values you for who you are, your personality, your sense of humor, your smarts, etc. you will know that he is the kind of person who thinks like you. He will be the kind of person who will still value you the same 20, 30 , 50 years from today when your bodies are old and your and your now-better-looking friends who are judged with how they look no longer have that look but you still have your real and true qualities. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Your acne.. it can be a blessing in finding out who really values you for more than your looks. Be positive. Besides.. hey acne... that's not a terrible thing.. it is just acne for God's sake.. Sooo many people have it. It's not some hideous thing. Smile. The beauty of a smile can hide one billion acnes.
2007-01-13 05:08:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
There is no answer that you will get here that will reverse these feelings. Although maybe some answer might inspire you.
But let me say to you that beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder.
Every culture in history has had its varying ideas about what makes a person physically attractive.
Acne is normal, treatable, and something that usually goes away over time. The scars can be eliminated with cosmetic surgery.
But something that you cannot change is what's inside of you. You can't get a sense of humor. You have it or you don't.
You can't just 'learn' talents like musical ability, writing, creativity, etc.
It is those unchangeable things that touch people most deeply.
And those things are what make you beautiful.
There actually are people in the world who do not care how you look. You rarely see them on TV or in movies. But they are out there.
And you are never what you think you look like. You are probably attractive to many, many people.
2007-01-13 05:11:23 · answer #3 · answered by Zezo Zeze Zadfrack 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea the world sucks. Based on our culture today, we have a very visual society where beauty is highly touted. Honestly a guy is that superficial that he doesn't want to date you because of your looks, then he isn't worth your time. A real guy knows that personality is more important that beauty, because beauty fades with age, but personality is something that is a part of you and won't change. So I say be yourself. It may take you a while to find a decent guy, but when you do, that relationship will be more real and of higher quality than anything that is so superficial. True beauty comes from within, so don't worry about what other people think about you. You shouldn't be offensive (make sure your clean and smell good), and if you have a sense of humor and a good outlook on life, someone will find you attractive. I guarantee.
2007-01-13 05:17:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothihg much u can do about how ppl judge others at first sight, physical attraction is needed a healthy relationship, ppl judge u according to your looks simply because its the first thing they see about u, its how u look, how u r dressed how u walk and so forth, ppl judge others in all kinds of ways, according to hight,weight, how u talk, how u walk how u do this how u do that and so on and so on. Should u cover your face up with heavy make up?? No that would be the wrong thing to do simply cuz heavy make up would make any person look ugly, trashy and so forth. Beauty is a false measure, even if a guy gets involved with miss america after 20 years, she will still get wrinckles, her breasts will still fall down south and so forth, what remains is your soul. Stay the way u r, dont mind what ppl thing, every person in this life has his soul mate that he will eventually meet. Ppl that die alone have experienced that only cuz they chose not to get involved not cuz they dont have any luck. I might find a girl really attractive while my friend might find her repulsive...Keep your head up..
2007-01-13 05:08:05 · answer #5 · answered by Alex S 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is a cruel world and we are exposed to too many materialistic items and fake beauty and artificial personality.
However dont give up as looks is not everything BUT its is something. If you have an acne issue, suggest you pay the dermatologist a visit, you should look goof for yourself.
I dress up as I love myself too much and I think I deserve every single dress, shoes, make up, spa, medicure and pedicure, its a way to indulge my self and to me this is what I call celebrating life, hey that is why being women is all about, we get to do so much stuff the guys dont..
It also makes me feel confident, I look healthy and happy. Men are attracted to women who knows how to carry themselves, what they want, what makes them happy and confident..
2007-01-13 05:09:09 · answer #6 · answered by Rosy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first step,see ur dr,or better yet,a dermatologist.retinoic acid creams and antibiotics should start to improve the situation.save ur money,start saving now-microdermabrasion and other treatments can rid u of the scars.insurance doesnt pay for "cosmetic" treatments,but save and someday u can really deal with the scars.till then,ur dermatologist can help u get a handle on the acne.u may need accutane-a highly effective treatment,but u may have to go on birth control,as drs rarely prescribe this drug for women of childbearing age,as it causes birht defects.exceptions have been made in severe cases,so talk to ur dr.if u dont have a dermatologist,even ur regular gp dr can help,or refer u to someone who can.2 of my college pals had severe acne,but found wonderful husbands.dont give up-there are treatments,and tho it may seem a long way off,like my friends,someone will see ur heart!never give up,people do care !!!! ps-it doesnt seem to matter now,but it is true that the oilier ur skin is,the less u wrinkle.when ur friends start to look old,u will look 10 yrs younger-something to look forward to,tho it sounds so far away !
2007-01-13 05:08:29 · answer #7 · answered by kyra k 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say you should not worry about about what others think of you. A guy needs to see that you are confident in yourself. And not held back by what you don't like about yourself. Ya most guys go for looks, but there are guys out there who look past floss. and see the real person.
2007-01-13 05:11:01 · answer #8 · answered by angel_lips 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldn't worry about what dudes think about your appearance and don't let it hurt the way you feel about yourself. I feel your pain. I've only had one real bf and even now I don't think he liked me because of the way I look. I've learned that I'm always gonna look a certain way and boys can take it or leave it. It's like this song called "Take Me As I Am" You should listen to it cause it just might change your outlook on things. hope that helped :)
2007-01-13 05:07:48 · answer #9 · answered by Losty 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's because everybody is easily swayed by the increasingly decadent pop culture we live in. Moral values are low, and people are always thinking of "live each day as if it were your last" rather than thinking about the long run. Music artists are no longer famous for the sound of their works, but the shapes of their bodies, and the same is true with film actors.
2007-01-13 05:03:20 · answer #10 · answered by glennkrueger 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
all people deserve a chance we need to start looking in the hearts of people not the looks,I have seen some fine looking women with a heart of hell so looks is not everything in a relationship.the world now is comparing and competing each other and that is not wise,everybody needs somebody and their is somebody out there for everybody no matter, looks, race ect..... The heart is where you look.
2007-01-13 05:09:38 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋