he is active in the local lib dem group, takes part in a Morris dance group and does a lot of runs with a group, which I enjoy but cannot run so I walk and meet him at the pub for a beer.
When we do that, we have a great day but he doens't seem to be satisfied with that. He has complained I do not support him in his political activities. Actually, I think he wants me to help the lib dem group with their activities because he doesn't have a lot of time himself.
Do you think I should change? He once told me I do not need to get involved with politics and yet complains that he doesn't love me becoz we do not share things in common.
2007-01-13 04:36:52 · 12 answers · asked by ladysorrow 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think it's wrong for him to change your political affiliations - after all, you are a thinking person who is a voter in her own right, so you have a right to your different opinion. But, yes, you should try and share other interests to bring you closer together. Love is based on a sound friendship, which forms the basis of the relationship, and a friendship will also see you through the rocky times. You have to have some things in common to have a friendship, otherwise where is the affinity that a friendship thrives on? The Morris dancing sounds like fun, and he obviously likes exercise so you could get involved with that, if not running. I'm sure you have plenty of common ground that you could find together, if you both wishes, but your political and religious views are very personal. However, if he is only asking you to stuff envelopes for the LibDems, then I don't think that is challenging your integrity at all.
2007-01-13 04:58:36 · answer #1 · answered by gorgeousfluffpot 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He seems very immature - so he thinks that if you'd only join the lib dems then suddenly he would love you?!
I agree with the answerer who said it sounds like this relationship is more a battleground than a relationship. You should not feel obliged to join a political party just because he says so! I think you need to tell him that unless he is willing to accept your differences (and i think you've been very accepting of his hobbies which you don't share, so it's time for a bit of reciprocity), you can't see a future. Yes, relationships are give-and-take, but it sounds like you're doing all the changing and doing what he wants, and he is doing nothing. Don't give into emotional blackmail.
2007-01-13 04:49:39 · answer #2 · answered by Nikita21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loved you he wouldnt care what your interests you share, and would make an effort to do some things you like as well. Your interests make you who you are, and by trying to change it will just be untrue to yourself, for a man who doesnt love you full stop. He is looking for an activity partner, not someone to love.
2007-01-13 05:03:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say this, but it sounds like your relationship is a bit of a battleground, this can't be good for either of you.
If you sublimate your interests in order to accommodate his...how long do you think you will last before you start to resent him?
Maybe his selfishness means that the relationship can never work properly unless he accepts that you are a different person to him.
It is my personal opinion that couple who are like each other are invariably boring, and those who want their partners to be mirror images of them are insecure and probably immature as well.
2007-01-13 04:45:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
nicely, your dealing with the wars arent you hun? the first element thats obvious is that you've a self-worth problem, youve were given to placed that precise first n maximum recommendations-blowing ok? Whats surpassed off is youve moved from one undesirable relationship, idea because the different one wasnt as undesirable makes it better, if i had a range of tangible abuse or psychological abuse ide opt for fpor the actual i imagine, a manipulator will continually play on your weaknesses, and yours is self-worth, the shortcoming of ability or concern of speaking up, thats why its now lengthy previous to the position you cant end a sentence, ya see? you recognize on your mind whats incorrect and what you dont like so so you might initiate bein heard ok, whats up, you deservr to be heard, thats why your askin the question! in case you want to order it thats what your gonna ought to do, if he doesnt like it after a lengthy time period or turns into violent p.c.. your luggage n stumble on a better conventional relationship with a classic guy, theres lots available ya understand? flow on, be courageous! everybody benefits a probability to sense free in this existence, its up tp you to inform your self that n believe it!
2016-12-02 05:19:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you said it- he does not love you- If your looking for love and a longer term relationship you might take the loss and feel the pain and then find a better match for your future. You deserve better!
2007-01-13 04:43:45 · answer #6 · answered by gregg s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have to change to get someone to love you. It seems to me he is just looking for excuses. His saying he doesn't love you is obviously making you unhappy and causing you to lose confidence and doubt yourself. It's time to walk away with your head held high.
2007-01-13 04:44:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The man don't really love you. Do not accommodate him. Be yourself and look for somebody who can make you happy.
2007-01-13 05:28:29 · answer #8 · answered by db 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have not said if you love him.Before you moved in togrther, was the situation like this. At the moment, it sounds like you just share a house, perhaps you should talk, please, no babies until you sort this ,hopefully, hiccup out.
2007-01-13 06:15:49 · answer #9 · answered by doda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope do not change.
I think that your relationship may have run its course, find someone that LOVES you for you.
2007-01-13 04:50:12 · answer #10 · answered by raggyann 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋