How do you forgive and forget? I kept getting asked "cant you forgive what I did?" I kinda forgave her but its always in teh back of my mind and sometimes stupid things make me think about it. Now trust is a really big issue. I have a lot of trouble with those 3 little words if I cant trust the person. BTW, she did teh only thing I asked her not to that I wouldnt be able for forgive, but she did it anyway. I dont get it.
2007-01-13 04:00:18 · 29 answers · asked by Jack 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
the past always trouble. it pains a lot if you remember. so forget it is the best remedy.if somebody cheat you it (to forget) will heel your wounds.to forgive is the most generous value.if you forgive somebody it will relax your mind you will be cheerfull..your life will be enjoyable.
2007-01-13 04:19:11 · answer #1 · answered by ramila p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once an act is done, all you can do is forgive. Trust is something so easily thrown away and so difficult to get back. My best friend fell out of trust with me once. I've forgiven but I've never forgotten. I'm always on guard, even if just a little bit. Forgiveness frees you to move on. If you feel like you can't ever forget and issues come up between the two of you, then there might be something going on that makes you feel that way. Have an open, honest communication with this person and let them know how you feel. Maybe you can move on if your feelings are heard clearly. A lesson I learned many times - always communicate in person - never email or mail or even phone. If it's that important to you, take the time to meet in person.Take care.
2007-01-13 04:13:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgiving is difficult; forgetting, nearly impossible. If you can't trust her maybe this isn't the right relationship for you. Being stressed out because you are thinking she might be doing it again is not healthy for you. And if you told her it was the one thing you could not forgive, and you do forgive it, she will be walking all over you for as long as you two are together; because she knows you will let her get away with whatever she wants.
2007-01-13 04:13:22 · answer #3 · answered by Aviator1013 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can do both. If your situation is anything like mine was then you just need to pray and ask for enlightment. I did. And right now I think I've just put in the back of my mind. I don't think about him as much or what he did. I don't think I could forgive him, in a way because I think that that is not my job. He needs to ask for HIS forgiveness not mine. I may have just confused you more but I guess the only thing I can say is that you seek God or pray and you'll feel better, trust me.
2007-01-13 04:25:17 · answer #4 · answered by naca101 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously your request was not reasonable to her. You can not dictate to another person what they can and can not do. If what she did was disrespectful to you and your relationship, then she does not care about the relationship. You can forgive her , but only so you can move forward with her. You don't have to forget, its just that she wants you to so she can feel more comfortable with what she has done. If the tables were turned you better believe she would never let you forget. Don't let her off the hook, she needs to prove she can be trusted. if the effort is too much for her, then Bye Bye
2007-01-13 04:09:17 · answer #5 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A person can forgive, but forgetting is something entirely different! Time is the only way for the pain to subside. If the person keeps doing the same thing over and over again it is hard to forget about something they had done.
If she keeps doing things like she did, move on. You can not change the way the tide flows...Do not sand against the grain, so many other sayings out there....
2007-01-13 04:07:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...its more of a individual thing...you got to practical enough not to think...as i think mind always think to great depth for negatives...but if you can let go the small things then consider this as yet another small thing and let it go...then you can forgive and forget...but the issue here is you are building a time bomb inside which can exoplode very badly...so make a correct choice
2007-01-13 04:13:37 · answer #7 · answered by Nitin G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she did those things to see what your reaction would be. other than that-she did it because she does not want to be with you. Find out which?
If you can't forgive or forget-you can keep experiencing the same issues until you learn the lesson which is "to forgive and forget."
2007-01-13 04:06:38 · answer #8 · answered by singsong 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have found you have to eveluate each person individually. find the boundries of their personalities and deal with them on that level.
eg. you will have some friends who are not worthy with money, so don't lend them any no matter their weeping stories.
. Another friend may have a blabber mouth. so don't tell her any secrets..
others are sex addicts..keep them far from your man. find the own unique quality or thing thats good about them and deal with them on that level only.
you can't expect wine for bread. you will be disappointed. No one is perfect and some you just have to drop if they are users.
You wont forget, don't..you have discovered their limits.. ..but do forgive..you are just wiser.
.hopefully you will discover their limits before you entrust them with the wrong thing.
2007-01-13 04:11:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok this is easy..i been there..First of all if she did the one thang then she really doesnt care bout your feelings...yeah you can forgive but u will never forget..If its still coming up then the trust is gone and she will never get your trust back..I hope she had a good reason for it..your a nice and loving guy for taking her back but your also know that it will not work out...as much as u would love it to save yaself the heartache and tell her to get the steppin..u derserve someone who appreciates you and ya'll relationship!!!...good luck!!
2007-01-13 04:11:48 · answer #10 · answered by confused69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋