Kids and spanking?

Question

HITTING PROMOTES ANGER - IN CHILDREN AND IN PARENTS
Children often perceive punishment as unfair. They are more likely to rebel against corporal punishment than against other disciplinary techniques. Children do not think rationally like adults, but they do have an innate sense of fairness—though their standards are not the same as adults. This can prevent punishment from working as you hoped it would and can contribute to an angry child. Oftentimes, the sense of unfairness escalates to a feeling of humiliation. When punishment humiliates children they either rebel or withdraw. While spanking may appear to make the child afraid to repeat the misbehavior, it is more likely to make the child fear the spanker.Parents who examine their feelings after spanking often realize that all they have accomplished is to relieve themselves of anger. This impulsive release of anger often becomes addicting—perpetuating a cycle of ineffective discipline.

Answer 1

Couldn't have said it better, and I'm so glad you brought it up here. Violence against one's children is one of the most awful and common travesties in the world today. Swat, smack, spank, tap, etc. - they all involve HITTING children. Those that do hit their children get angry when logic and compassion begin to overshadow the "surety" of their decision to hit. It is nothing less than assault and battery. I believe the anger comes because if most admit it is bad to do , they would have to then admit that the people who did it to them were somehow wrong even though these were the people they loved and trusted most in childhood.

For you who don't want to hear it - LISTEN UP. How would you feel if someone smacked you when you didn't do exactly what they wanted you to do? How would you feel if you were physically punished at work? Hitting is not only lazy, it is extremely dangerous as Ivelina has pointed out. Hitting is hitting is hitting - to call it anything but is to overwhelmingly sugarcoat, and manipulate, the truth. I don't care if your parents did it and you "turned out fine". If you were fine you wouldn't agree with utilizing violence against someone who is extremely vulnerable and defenseless. Please stop now, while there are still some souls (and bodies) to be saved. Children who are treated with empathy and kindness and disciplined in a positive manner will grow up to be empathic, kind, disciplined and happy adults. For those of you who constantly utilize the argument that "all the non-spanking PC kids are the ones getting preganant early and doing drugs", you are so wrong I cannot even muster enough words to explain it. Go to a prison for violent criminals. Ask how many were hit as children. Watch every hand rise in the place. A child who is treated with love (you cannot "lovingly" hit someone, it's an oxymoron) and structure very rarely becomes a criminal adult. They don't feel the need to rebel because they know they can turn to their parents when they are feeling angry or unhappy. Stop victimizing your children. You are teaching them nothing - except, perhaps, to lie to you more efficiently and hide their true feelings internally. Violence against children makes for depressive, angry, and anxious adults.

If children don't deserve our respect, then why do we deserve theirs? How much need for control must one have to resort to hitting their children? There are always other ways to discipline - ways that work in the long-term.

Thank you so much for asking this question.

Answer 2

An angry parent who spanks their child out of anger promotes anger in the child and feelings of unfairness. But a child who has done wrong and is spanked knows why they are being spanked. Children are smarter than we think. When a child is allowed to err with out repercussion he will continue to err and each incident will be greater than the first. I would rather spank my child as a small child than to have some police officer beat him to death as a young adult. If we allow or children to grow up without punishment and yes even spankings then we put our children at risk of believing that every and anything they do is acceptable. The will think they are invincible and that the laws don't apply to them. They will be fearless and fearlessness is a dangerous state of mind. Fearlessness and ruthlessness are one and the same. They need to know right from wrong and that some of our actions can be painful. Our children should not be afraid of us as parents but, they need to fear what may happen to them if they do the wrong thing.

Answer 3

do you prefer to grant them (i) a birthday spanking or (ii) a spanking as a punishment? (i) A birthday spanking shouldn't make the birthday undesirable for little ones, appropriate? So it might continually be with purely the hand...perhaps 15-20 slaps? Or any quantity that doesn't make your little ones cry. that's pants down and up too, regardless of the certainty that that's in inner maximum or in a occasion. Modesty isn't a controversy under the age of 8 for boys besides as females. (ii) all of us be responsive to and agree that punishment spanking would desire to be slightly greater sturdy, with a view to make a baby understand. "Hand belt paddle" relies upon on the form of offense. If that's a minor one, hand is fantastic, otherwise a ruler and/or a belt. Paddles would desire to ideally not be used with little ones, enormously under 10. Pants would properly be delivered down, returned based upon how intense the offense is. i'm not a confirm yet i'm a teenager who used to get spanked.

Answer 4

yeah right-if you say so. I am a firm believer in spanking, if it is needed. There is a big difference between discipline and abuse, ya know. A good ole spanking when deserved never hurt anyone.Too many parents are afraid of their kids. They live by the threat from the brat of him/her threatening to call the child protective services----------all I can say is go ahead and call I will dial the number for you/them because if a spanking is needed (and ONLY when needed) they will be spanked.

Answer 5

I never spanked my child, and he is now a well-adjusted adult. Time out always worked well. Perhaps it depends on the situation, though. I have some intelligent and well-meaning friends who spank. When I see the behavior that prompts the spankings, I realize that if my child had done that, I might have been a spanker, too.

I wonder if successful non-spankers are just lucky.

Answer 6

i agree with patty.
seriously, get help now, and stop making such a nuisance of yourself.
just thought to ask, how are your living children? and furthermore, why aren't you still in the hospital? after delivering quadruplets, you'd still be in there right now whether any of them survived or not. and at 17. such a tender age for so many children. let's overlook the fact that your body wouldn't be able to handle the workload of twins very well much less twice that much.get your homework done and stop being such a moron. it's getting really very old. fast.

Answer 7

Considering the fact that one of your other questions deals with you being pregnant with quads at the age of 17 and saying you were raped by your GYN while in the delivery room...... I'll just say that you have alot of time on your hands and maybe you should get busy with your homework or maybe spend some time with your parents instead of playing on the computer.

Answer 8

Do you have kids? If you have never dealt with kids you need to stop. Personally I think that's why we're going down is we're too soft. A swat on the aarse --NOT A BEATING--- never hurt anyone.

Answer 9

I totally agree with you in every way.

Answer 10

This is starting to get to spam level. Pack it in.