Locking a Child up in a Cage for Discipline?

Question

I have been watching Super Nanny and one technique that Super Nanny uses it the Naughty Bean Bag Technique. If the child is naughty, he or she is put on the Naughty Bean Bag and must stay there fore five minutes before apologizing. If the child leaves then the parent has to put the child back on the bean bag.

My wife and I have tried this technique on our 5-year-old son and when we try is what we find is that our son takes a long time (maybe half an hour) to apologize and every single time we bring him to the bean bag he tries to run away and we have to carry him back.

My friend James recommends I lock the child up in a room or cage. My wife said this was horrible but James said that it's practically the same thing. If the child is on a bean bag and every time he tries to escape he is put back there then that is virtually the same as if the child were locked in a room because the child's movements are deprived and this is what the whole punishment is about.

Should I lock my son up?

James argues that the Naughty Bean Bag Technique and locking the kid up in a cell both achieve the same thing but locking a child up saves the parent time whereas the Naughty Bean Bag Technique uses up the parents' time resources, which are wasted and could be put into other important things like doing the dishes or cleaning the floor.

My wife said that locking a child up is child abuse and morally wrong, but James argues that locking a child up is the same as Super Nanny's Naughty Bean Bag Technique and Super Nanny's technique is televised and praised by parents. If Super Nanny's technique is morally okay then it logically follows that locking a child up is morally okay.

The Naughty Bean Bag Technique is a variation of the Naughty Chair Technique, which is detailed at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naughty_chair

Answer 1

I don't think so, because it's a part of a child abuse.

I recommend you to try to under stand your kid's 'naughty' behavior, whether it's a bad thing or not. Maybe, your child is just too active, and he thinks he doesn't have proper means to satisfy his activity.

Or, you can take your son to a child expert. so that there's a chance that the expert can tell you how or what your son really needs. You can discuss about his behaviour at home, and how to handle it.

Answer 2

Locking a child in a room or cage is going to do nothing for this kid. Its like calling him/her a animal you would only put a dog in its cage when it acts up. Your bean bag chair will work and its not child abuse in anyway. Its the same as making your child sit on the couch. Locking him/her up in a cage is something I would expect to read out of a book like The Child Called It. Its something I would expect you to turn this father in for. Its wrong. I watch that show myself and find it useful in a short 6 weeks I'm going to be a mom and when my son needs discipline I will use there idea. If I remember right the Nanny's have the parents tell the child why they have to sit on the naughty spot a 5 year old is not going to know what he did is wrong unless he is told.

Answer 3

Locking a child up in a cage is child abuse. Parenting takes patience and consistency and fosters a trusting relationship between parent and child.

If you feel you need more help with your son than a TV show can give, I suggest you contact a local social service agency to hook you up with some parenting classes.

A good rule of thumb to remember is discipline is always instructive for the child. If your child isn't learning from you, you aren't doing it right! :)

"Time Out" Technique
1. The reminder and the reason:
"Johnny, we don't hit. Hitting hurts. Next time I will
put you in the naughty spot".
2. The time-out:
" Johnny, hitting hurts. You must not hit. Now you must
sit in the naughty spot for five minutes. I will start the
timer as soon as you are quiet. When the buzzer
goes off, I will come and talk to you."
3. Consistency: No more talking to the child. Place the
child back in time-out in an area you can supervise.
Continue to place the child on the time out spot until
he staus there. Go about your usual routine and
ignore the child. When the buzzer goes off, go to
your child.
4. The apology: Use the question/planning method:
Question: "Why did mommy put you in the naughty
spot?" (Child: Because I hit) Planning: What are you
going to do next time? (Child: I will use my words
instead of hitting)

Answer 4

No, don't lock your child up. Didn't we hear something in the news recently about a couple that locked their kids in cages-bad deal. Parenting is a very serious job, one that we as parents can't take lightly. Continue to use the Naughty Bean Bag chair. If you son takes a long time, that's ok. Be right there ready to assist in any way that is necessary, maybe ask him after 15 min. if he thinks his actions were right or not and what he should do (apologize). If he gets up off the bean bag chair-then you have to put him right back on the chair. (I'd even go so far as to suggest that after a couple times of having to put him back on the chair maybe you swat his butt lightly to show you really mean business). Remember, it is very, very important that you use the bean bag chair as something your child will know he'll be put on if he misbehaves.

Answer 5

no its not the same thing for this reason....if you lock a child in a room then they cant get out and learn to control their behaviors..if you continue to put the child on the bean bag chair they will eventually learn they cannot leave the bean bag chair but still feel as though they have a certain amount of control..they will also see how much energy it takes for you to keep putting them back on their so they will feel important. Then eventually they will learn to sit there and will do it because they can. I think the bean bag is harder at first but pays off much more in the end.

Answer 6

I think it would be morally wrong if you caged your 5 yr old son. And i think locking a bedroom door or any kind of door would be cruel.

Persistance and consistency is the key.

Maybe you could start taking away things that your son really enjoys, as punishment if he keeps moving from the designated spot he's supposed to stay at.

Personally i wouldn't listen to what your friend James has said to you. I hope to God he doesn't have any children.
Definately listen to your wife, she seems to be well balanced!

There is a big difference in a cage/locked bedroom compared to a simple bean bag. Locking him up or caging him could see your son suffering emotionally later down the track.

Try and work out why your child is doing what he's doing, and possibly then you may be able to prevent it from happening again.

I stumbled across this site while trying to answer your question, i hope it helps!

http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/parenting_tips/discipline/time_out.html

Answer 7

No, your son needs to learn to stay in the bean bag. This is the part of discipline where your son needs to learn self control and locking him up in a cage is cruel and abusive.

I am curious as to why your son stays in the bean bag for 30 minutes instead of five? Is it because he will not apologize?

If your son gets out of the beanbag chair take him and put him back in, no matter how many times it takes. Eventually he will get the idea that he isn't getting out of the chair without following mom and dad's requests.

Locking a child in a cage because you don't want to follow through with discipline is lazy.

Answer 8

No!

Your child will learn self-discipline (eventually) with your current method. Locking him up is just plain wrong!!

There is another method called progressive isolation. You give your child a time-out in his room with the door closed (not locked) for a set time (maybe 2 minutes). If he obeys (stays in his room with the door shut) then the time-out has ended. Otherwise, the clock is reset, and the time is lengthened (perhaps to 4 minutes). You repeat this cycle, increasing the time each cycle until the child obeys. Afterwards, ask him to tell you why he was punished. He probably knows, but if not, tell him. Explain that he'll be punished in the same way if this happens again. This technique worked wonders for me when my children were very young.

Good Luck!!

Answer 9

No, you shouldn't lock your son up.

Keep doing what you're doing...stay strong and be firm. However the less said the best.

You did this and when your time out is done, you may leave the time out area. If you continue to use this he will learn. Remember you are the parent and you set the rules

Best wishes
I believe there was a couple in Ohio that lost their children for locking them up...type in News and locking children up.(under your search) Not a good thing....teaching them fear.

Answer 10

Parenting involves interaction and involvement. You may have to take him back to that chair many times. If that was my kid he'd get a swat on the bottom if he was definant that many times. something to let him know I mean business. You don't have to hit hard just enough to feel a tinge which s a deturrent from repeating the crime enough that the second time only the threat of it creates compliance. I only use this as a last resort though. I will take away priviliges first. I like the punishment fitting the crime too. If he crayons he cleans it off the walls and the like.