Should I tell a close friend that I suspect his girlfriend could be sleeping with his best friend?

Question

A group of my friends have been noticing some odd behavior between one of my friend's girlfriend and another friend. Some of this behavior includes private dinners together, traveling together and generally flirtatious behavior. However, I don't have any definitive proof and it could just be conjecture.

Should I say something or just let it be? I don't want to get involved but feel like I should say something as a good friend.

If I should say something, what is the best way to tell him and not cause more conflict?

Answer 1

i was in a situation where a guy was cheating on me, ALL his friends knew, and i kept on dating him. i had a bad feeling about him, but he told me he was faithful and wouldn't ever dream of cheating on me with anybody, that he didn't find anyone else as attractive as me, and all those lies that cheating guys tell. he broke up with me when i wouldn't sleep with him, and said "oh, by the way, i was cheating on you with ___ and i'm glad because she was so much more fun than you!"

His friends all assumed that I knew, or that someone else would have dropped a hint... but no, i wasted a year of my life with a cheater despite my doubts-- i just thought i was insecure! If only someone would have mentioned it to me!

My advice would be to ask "How is it that you and __ are so stable in your relationship that you don't mind when she goes out to dinner alone with __ ? I think it's amazing that you can trust her so much-- you must be pretty confident."

If he seems to have no idea what you are talking about, just tell him you thought he knew already and that you have no evidence of cheating whatsoever, but tell him what you know IF he asks you.

This is what I wish someone would have done with me when I was being cheated on.

Answer 2

Before you say anything to your good friend (which could just turn out to be not true or false accusations) and lose your good friend, I would try to approach in a gracious way the other partner. Do not approach accusing - but approaching something like this, "Hi, I've been noticing such and such a behavior from you and ***. This behavior to to others may appear as if you are ******* and if my good friend were to see or know she may be hurt by it. Then see what they say - go from there....

But no one likes a tale bearer - especially with this kind of news or accusations - Friendships are lost like this.

Answer 3

I'd probably nonchalantly ask your friend why his girlfriend and his best friend seem to hang out so much lately. Your suspicions that they might be sleeping together aren't based on any actual evidence. They may not have slept together, at least not yet. But, making your friend aware that the behavior "stands out" might get him to find out what's really going on. Be VERY careful with your words though, and don't put his girlfriend down, ever. You don't want to distance yourself from your friend. He may choose to believe that everything is all completely innocent, at least for now. Let him figure it out for himself from that point.

Answer 4

well u should try talkin 2 his best friend or even his gf...try if u can find out somethin....if u cnt get any info from them then just talk 2 ur friend and tell him that this is wat u think, dnt 4get 2 tell him dat u also might be wrong....in the other hand u might cause a conflict wid ur friend
if i where u id defiently try talkin 2 ma friend coz i wouldnt want them 2 get hurt if i was right.....
if u dnt tell him anythin he might get hurt in the end and it would have been ur fault coz u never told him anythin

and if he had found out that all wat u said wasnt true i dnt think that he'd get that angry coz i true friend would realize dat u where only tryin 2 protect them

Answer 5

Approach the partner first to see if you can get anything juicy then tell the boyfriend.

Answer 6

mind your own